Re: Parents and Beliefs
JazakAllah khair koolkomal, Dushwari, Pathani, Da DutchesS, Promiscuous Paki, ~Iraj~, WitchDr, Iconoclast for sharing your kind views. They really helped me alot.
I would like to clear few things here. Alot of times such discussions take place among uncles or relatives and at that time if I remain quiet they would bulldose me with their biased views.
If I leave, than I am non respectful person. If I start giving logic, than after sometime they would not be aware if their views even make sense, as the only thing that seem to bother them is "How can a boy whom we even saw in "push chair" (when one year old) can now prove our views wrong ?"
Than they would start telling me that their experience is even more than my age and I haven't yet slept any nights with empty stomach. Than with a sobre look they would say " We know Allah's orders are true and we also believe that the way of the Prophet (saw) was the best, but the zamana is different now, the time 1400 years before was different,..blah blah..."
I know I am not a good muslim but I don't want to sound like a "Munafiq" by molding my personality according to the "group" I sit in. Also everyone says that "Rizq" and "Respect" is in the hands of Allah, but their attitude and way of thinking says that it is in the hands of their BIG BOSS (nauzubillah)
They say that you see it is enough that you do basics of Islam right, and the details are not very important (as if they have been given a garantee of Jannat by Allah, inspite of whatever they do) but when it comes to exams in Universities, they would be angry at me for achieving 85 % instead of 90%.
After getting logical proofs and reasoning they would say " Everyone would be held answerable for their own deeds" but after a couple of days they themselves would feel uneasy with your Beard or Hijab, and couldnt resist to comment.
When other relatives spend three hours till late night in the musical evenings, it is all fine, as they are unwinding and relaxing themselves. BUT if you are half and hour late from the Masjid than the house is on fire.
Previously they used to keep saying that once you become stable in your career and get engaged, than do whatever you like, BUT after you get a scholarship for Ph.D abroad and you get engaged, then Shaitaan brings more "waswasa's" (false suspecions) in their minds. And they say that you are at a very critical stage of your career so be careful. Than I start wondering that who was the one who advised me " Son, ALWAYS do in your life whatever satisfies "your" heart, and don't listen to anyone in achieving your aim"
Should I have to even tell them what my REAL aim is ?
I am not only talking about my parents, but some general examples of elders I have seen among my relatives and observed people around me, who are enjoying high status in society and seem to think that they might never be held answerable for minor details if they are following the basics of Islam Correctly. They seem to forget that Allah says that don't do a small sin by thinking of it to be minor and don't leave a small good deed by thinking of it to be minor as you never know due to which of your deeds Allah might forgive you.
