my frend was telling me today how some family asked for her rishta one month ago and they still haven’t come to see her. she was saying that they called her family and said they wanted to come (were acting like dey were already engaged/getting married) and then called 2 days later and said that they were busy because an issue came up with work/school and they couldn’t come till later., they gave specific date but its been a few weeks since then. and no followup till this point.
is this normal? i told her that dey are probably busy because dey live on the opposite coast and its not that easy to get out of a job randomly and come. she thinks they have moved on but i find that difficult to believe since they were extremely persistent about the whole thing(went through lengthy process to get contact info, i woudl assume someone that’s not that interested wouldn’t try so hard)
I don’t know how rishta process works so I can’t tell what is going on. From experience, does it take this long and she is just being impatient or chances are they moved on?
Its perfectly normal for families to move on despite spending so much time and efforts on a girl/ family in an arranged setting and they do not regret making efforts when moving on if they find a better prospect somewhere else. This could also be that there is some disagreement going on within their family, may be the guy is not as willing to proceed with your friend, or the sister wants to get her brother married off to one of her friends etc. Anything can happen in marriage matters and things should not be considered final unless and untill engagement/ baat pakki rasam has been held (well for that matter, there is still no guarantee but usually shareef families respect their commitments). I have also seen families contacting again for rishta for as long as after 2-5 years and asking whether the girl is still unmarried and then they finalised the rishta.
they must be weighing their options? or maybe they are going ahead with another rishta but keep you at tabs too since the other may or may not work out? Who knows.
so wierd. i remember when they asked her, bechari ko exam ke week tang kiya tha. she kept saying that she didn't think her parents were looking because she's going to medical school iA in September but they insisted. and then they called and her family said the same thing that they want her to complete education...and they kept sayin they were okay with it and now no response. The only thing I could think of is that maybe her caereer choice? but that's not a surprise, they knew from before. God knows...ajeeb....
yeah i just thought that it would be extremely rude to call, make a date to come over, then call and say that they're gonna make a different date, and then....never call back. Batameezi, right?
I believe, if they are no longer interested, then they should let her family know about this but as Zareenkhan said above, perhaps they must be weighing their options.
my frend was telling me today how some family asked for her rishta one month ago and they still haven't come to see her. she was saying that they called her family and said they wanted to come (were acting like dey were already engaged/getting married) and then called 2 days later and said that they were busy because an issue came up with work/school and they couldn't come till later., they gave specific date but its been a few weeks since then. and no followup till this point.
is this normal? i told her that dey are probably busy because dey live on the opposite coast and its not that easy to get out of a job randomly and come. she thinks they have moved on but i find that difficult to believe since they were extremely persistent about the whole thing(went through lengthy process to get contact info, i woudl assume someone that's not that interested wouldn't try so hard)
I don't know how rishta process works so I can't tell what is going on. From experience, does it take this long and she is just being impatient or chances are they moved on?
current situation suggest that your friend's family want to meet face to face with guy family. But no move yet happen its mean both are free and can look other options.
current situation suggest that your friend's family want to meet face to face with guy family. But no move yet happen its mean both are free and can look other options.
yeah they thought larkay walay would follow up for the meeting since they were the ones that called and then cancelled. but who knows. the politics of method with whch these rishtaay happen is so cnfusing. i dont understand why people aren't just blunt about it or at least polite and make one phone call to say something so that other party is not left waiting with any hope. just end it.
It dnt know if its true or if alot of people follow this but i think some people do istakhara after looking at a rishta and give a yes/no based on it?! So i have been told.
ahhh they came over yesterday!!! She doesn't know how it went though , her parents think that they're interested since they seemed to have done thorough research beforehand and still came...so who knows.
It happens in arranged settings. Guys families don't see anything wrong in being out of scene and then suddenly appearing to take things forward. It might be that they had seen elsewhere and then thought this proposal was better or previously they were not interested in the marriage (the guy being busy with his education/ project etc) and now when they think its good time to move things forward, they just come back to the girl and start proceeding.
