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oh... hehe, i didnt say, wholely, i said, according to the experiences i have seen in my life... my friends, cousins... relatives.... people around me, most of them are victim of this situation...sometimes their family has issues, and sometimes they themselves have.... after knowing AMPLE about eachother..heheheh

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No.

I used to think engagements are awesome because you get to dress up right away. But in all honesty, its a terrible idea.

There is no religious value to an engagement.

A better alternative is a simple nikah and then preparing for the mayun, mehndi, shaadi and valima.

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No, it's just a waste of time and like PSquared said.. it has no religious value to it whatsoever. An engagement is pretty much equal to uncertainty for both parties.
What most of the people i know did was, perform the nikkah and after a couple of months the rukhsati and everything around it. In my opinion, that's the best way.

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Well , why not ?

Isnt it better to learn swiming in a swimming pool and then dive into a rough sea ?

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^ Why make life hard on yourself?
You're still going to end up diving into a rough sea, because being engaged is not the same as being married and living with that person 24/7.

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But engagement also works as a easy way out in arrange marriage ..

if things don’t work well , ya can call it quit , much harder if nikah is done ...

what is the harm in an engagement.

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Aliyish..
You have the choice to say 'no' if you don't want to be pushed into an arranged marriage.
It's about how strong you are to refuse... so in that way there's no need to even call it a quit.

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No it hink you should get engaged after marriage, not before.

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^ That's a great alternative Sara!

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

This thread is not about that kind of engagement , it is very innocent thread about exchange of ring , dawaat etc etc.

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yes and no depending on the families involved

i think YES when it comes to arrange marriage-- like if i was to b paired up wiht sumone my family chose- and ive never met the person or know him from the past then id like for us to get engaged frst have sum time to ourselves to get to know one another and see our compatibility-- then get married after when were ready for sure- and plan it all out- but if i was to marry someone i chose and ive known him for a while and our families know one another- then i dont think id go for engagement id go straight for nikkah- cuz we all already know one another --so its a Yes and No from my side lol

I agree with this person on what they wrote above!

Have to add to no 6: Hindu cultural norm

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i think its ar rite for smaller periods to give both parties time to prepare for the wedding and think abt the relationship, u can pull out any time if u r not feeling comfortable . . .u know. in nikkah, u r kind a stuck. Engagements i have seen does not include boy/girl seeing each other during that time or talking on the phone.

One would ask then how would u get to know the person an pull out?
well ur family does that when they meet the canidate time and over

i remember my chachu was engaged for few months back in early 90s and we were having little parties every now and then but then every thing finished. Which party and why pulled out, i still dont know. . ... any way my chachu got married next year and living happily with three kids now. no problems. and the new girl he married is my fav chachy :)

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i believe it's okay if there is engagement before marriage.People don't really have to spend a lot of money on engagement ceremony,it can be a small get-together where the two can exchange rings with each other..

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I think engagement a looonnng engagement is really important...not like the one the girl and the guy meet but maybe just talk and get to know each other betterover the phone.

That's totally not true. Ask someone who is Arab, or Iranian. The engagement is the only party a girl's family throws (in Islam the guys side pays for the wedding) Its a big deal.