age is just a number but he's been married once before, it could've just been bad luck but has she found out why the other marriage didn't work out from a reliable source, not saying she should be a gossip but it's always good to know all that background before diving into something her parents wouldn't approve of. I mean is it that rare for men to be nice, at work people have to be professional and have to appear as such, who knows how he is at home with friends,family other women.
she really doesn't know much about him other than the image he portrays at work. those wolves in sheep's clothing can be deadly.....just sayin she should be more practical and see all sides of this issue before making such a big decision
age is just a number but he's been married once before, it could've just been bad luck but has she found out why the other marriage didn't work out from a reliable source, not saying she should be a gossip but it's always good to know all that background before diving into something her parents wouldn't approve of. I mean is it that rare for men to be nice, at work people have to be professional and have to appear as such, who knows how he is at home with friends,family other women.
she really doesn't know much about him other than the image he portrays at work. those wolves in sheep's clothing can be deadly.....just sayin she should be more practical and see all sides of this issue before making such a big decision
Exactly! I was also gonna ask you Niksik if your cousin has thought about asking him why his first marriage didn't work out. It could be anything of course, but if she is serious about him as a potential hubby, i imagine it'd definitely be worth finding out, right?
As for the man's first marriage, what I know is that the ex wife and him just didn't get along. She came from a family that wasn't as well off and spend a lot of his money on fuzool stuff. She didn't want to have kids. Now, of course we only hear one side of the story, but the guy has been divorced for very long now, never remarried. He says that he didn't have "feelings" for anyone all this while and was pretty content with his situation until my cousin came along and thoughts of marriage crept in.
I also warned my cousin that maybe he's looking for a younger girl so he can have kids...just playing the devil's advocate here...dunno.
Maybe he does truly love her. Anyway, she did ask around about his first marriage and people don't have much to say. It's the "oh they were very different" that she's heard of mostly.
Suggestions for how to convince her parents that an older man is better for their daughter as they have more life experience, are sexier and richer?
Hmmmm
older men are sexier because youre only looking at George Clooney.
Please realize that for the vast majority of men, looks take an ugly turn as they enter their mid 30's and its always downhill after 25 no matter how you cut it. there is balding, the face shape is no longer the same, the forehead gets bigger etc. You certainly havent been looking closely.
As for the man's first marriage, what I know is that the ex wife and him just didn't get along. She came from a family that wasn't as well off and spend a lot of his money on fuzool stuff. She didn't want to have kids. Now, of course we only hear one side of the story, but the guy has been divorced for very long now, never remarried. He says that he didn't have "feelings" for anyone all this while and was pretty content with his situation until my cousin came along and thoughts of marriage crept in.
I also warned my cousin that maybe he's looking for a younger girl so he can have kids...just playing the devil's advocate here...dunno.
Maybe he does truly love her. Anyway, she did ask around about his first marriage and people don't have much to say. It's the "oh they were very different" that she's heard of mostly.
Whatever the reason is, 24 years difference is just too much in my dictionary to give a nod.
Yes Yes, I know there are exceptions and guy may be genuine, Yes I know age is only a number and you are as old as you feel but if I see life ahead, I see many complications...
I dont know if people would agree with me or not but i think that as women get older and more mature, move into their early 30's, become more independent and experienced; they are less likely to have relationships and settle down with significantly older men, than women who are in their early 20's.
if she can bring her parents round well and good, otherwise the element of risk is rather higher. arranged marriage isnt a threat anymore, there is a getting to know eachother phase, does help and you dont really start off as strangers after marriage.
My advice to her has been to block her mind from this proposal for a while, go about living her normal life and entertain the other rishtas that are coming through. She may realize how strongly she feels or not feels for this person during that time and can then make a reasonable decision.
Marrying an older man is not something wrong. But chances are that a girl might be marrying an older man because of some reason, his wealth, sober personality, qualifications and professional success, infatuation, etc.
Once the girl is married, she might start seeing things differently when the husband can't accompany her in her hobbies and routines because of age or different in perspective, attitude or understanding and also when she sees younger husbands of her friends and cousins.
Nik, if your friend is able to convince her parents for this proposal, there is no guarantee that she will be satisfied with her decision after marriage. I agree marriage is a gamble and there are many unforeseenable factors which affect the outcomes of marriage but in this case, this age factor will add to the risk.
One day at a pakistani show, I saw a couple in entry/ticketing area.
Wife kept her self and looked like lahori movie star.
Husband looked like lahori transporter.
Wife was being taroo openly, and very keenly.
Hubby could not care less.
