Obedient Wives

[S02]

Re: Obedient Wives

@NomiCA

Fuel of hellfire is increasing by the day…

disobedient wives are one more addition …**

Volume 1, Book 2, Number 28**

Narrated Ibn 'Abbas:The Prophet said: “I was shown the Hell-fire and that the majority of its dwellers were women who were ungrateful.” It was asked, “Do they disbelieve in Allah?” (or are they ungrateful to Allah?) He replied, “They are ungrateful to their husbands and are ungrateful for the favors and the good (charitable deeds) done to them. If you have always been good (benevolent) to one of them and then she sees something in you (not of her liking), she will say, 'I have never received any good from you.”

Being ungrateful is not the same as disobedience. Being grateful does not mean you have to be obedient. The issue in this hadith is respect and appreciation, not obedience.

[Moodie_Foodie]

@Gaia

Are no more! Well, at least not in Life1 .

In the past (I guess our parents generations) a husband was the next best thing after God. At least that’s what my Mom tells me about the times when she got married. It was just a fact of life, that you do as your husband says because he will have your best interest at heart.

Now, those days are long gone when biwi’s do exactly as their husband says. They want to work, want to be part of financial planning in the house, don’t really want to live with MIL’s, and husband’s word is definitely not the final decision in the house.

So is this good or bad for future marriages?

The only thing bad for the future of marriages is this type of mentality. You do realize this is the year 2012 and women can work and raise children n take care of the house and it is perfectly welcomed if the husband chipped in and took some of the responsibility in his hand. In a marriage, respect and mutual understanding is what makes it successful, not obedience on the wife’s part. Husbands should be respected, not placed on pedestals for worship and as flawed as humans are how can they be the next best thing to God!! When referred to husband as a mijazi khuda, its in respect only as well as not denying him physical intimacy. However, he can also not Force himself on her if she does say no. In my personal opinion, it boils down to respect, trust and understanding, not obedience that makes a marriage successful or something that define the wife and husband.

[Reha]

Re: Obedient Wives

No marriage that I have seen worth admiring has been a product of obedience. The enviable relationships where husband and wife truly cared for one another and created a loving environment for their families…those people don’t simply obey.

My grandmother and mother were not obedient women…they were very hardworking, loving and caring women. They took care of their families out of love. My grandfather and father didn’t boss them around or any of that filmi stuff.

If two people simply stay married because they think they have no other option…that doesn’t make their marriage successful. That’s a waste of life. If two people marry each other, love and care for each other…that is a marriage I’d want to have someday, Inshallah.

Why is marriage always depicted as some sort of punishment looming ahead for the woman where she will be tied to the stove? Who would ever find that kind of union or partner attractive?

[TT]

Re: Obedient Wives

@NomiCA

Fuel of hellfire is increasing by the day…

disobedient wives are one more addition …**

Volume 1, Book 2, Number 28**

Narrated Ibn 'Abbas:The Prophet said: “I was shown the Hell-fire and that the majority of its dwellers were women who were ungrateful.” It was asked, “Do they disbelieve in Allah?” (or are they ungrateful to Allah?) He replied, “They are ungrateful to their husbands and are ungrateful for the favors and the good (charitable deeds) done to them. If you have always been good (benevolent) to one of them and then she sees something in you (not of her liking), she will say, 'I have never received any good from you.”

Good one. Why am I not surprised to see another post about how evil women are coming from you?

[NomiCA]

Re: Obedient Wives

@TT

Good one. Why am I not surprised to see another post about how evil women are coming from you?

that is the word of the Prophet of Islam … not mine…

@Sahar02

Being ungrateful is not the same as disobedience. Being grateful does not mean you have to be obedient. The issue in this hadith is respect and appreciation, not obedience.

oh..sorry…you refuted what i said…

(i don’t want to say religious things in life1 matters…but this is just because you deleted my earlier post and now you refuted this…so i had to quote this.)

An-Nisa..verse 34

Sahih International
Men are in charge of women by [right of] what Allah has given one over the other and what they spend [for maintenance] from their wealth. So righteous women are devoutly obedient, guarding in [the husband’s] absence what Allah would have them guard. But those [wives] from whom you fear arrogance - [first] advise them; [then if they persist], forsake them in bed; and [finally], strike them. But if they obey you [once more], seek no means against them. Indeed, Allah is ever Exalted and Grand.

Yusuf Ali
Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has given the one more (strength) than the other, and because they support them from their means. Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient, and guard in (the husband’s) absence what Allah would have them guard. As to those women on whose part ye fear disloyalty and ill-conduct, admonish them (first), (Next), refuse to share their beds, (And last) beat them (lightly); but if they return to obedience, seek not against them Means (of annoyance): For Allah is Most High, great (above you all).

**
PS
i sincerely apologise to anyone who is offended by posting these verses here…or doesn’t agree with the content of what the verses.

PS2
the topic at hand is obedience of wife…thats why i posted this…there are many verses and hadith about men too…but thats not the topic so i didnt post them here..**

[Catskin]

Re: Obedient Wives

What desis think obedient wives do?

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[NomiCA]

Re: Obedient Wives

did i just killed the thread by posting the verses from quran??

[Krypton]

Re: Obedient Wives

I think all the issues boil down to translation, interpretation, context, and the understanding of everything from the male perspectivein religious texts.

[NomiCA]

Re: Obedient Wives

@philosophy

I think all the issues boil down to translation, interpretation, context, and the understanding of everything from the male perspectivein religious texts.

you are most welcome to share “translation, interpretation, context, and the understanding” of the above verses from a female scholar…

[S02]

Re: Obedient Wives

@NomiCA

did i just killed the thread by posting the verses from quran??

Probably since you did not state your own interpretation or point, just quoted the text.

Also, the trolls left.

[NomiCA]

Re: Obedient Wives

@Sahar02

Probably since you did not state your own interpretation or point, just quoted the text.

Also, the trolls left.

the text is self-explanatory…and i didn’t put my own interpretation because that would be mine… i quoted two separate translations too…so that no ambiguity is left in the meaning/interpreation…

[S02]

Re: Obedient Wives

^Yup. You brought something to our attention, but I guess people didn’t feel there was anything left to discuss. Shall I close the thread now?