Mostly, the person going through the pain is the one who actually knows and feels the nature and intensity of the bitter experience he faces in life, but mostly other people in their surroundings simply don’t seem to feel it the same way and give advices which are biased in one way or the other. EXCEPT those who have gone through very similar difficulties, because they give practical and realistic solutions instead of what they were taught to believe or think.
When you go through a pain, do you consult the person with whom you have close relations and understandings or the one whom you don’t know much but he is someone who has already gone through similar situation ?
How do you judge if the person is actually placing himself sincerely in your position in order to understand you ?
Re: Not puting oneself in someons's position and advising
deepnds on the situaton, either, both, niether..
Re: Not puting oneself in someons's position and advising
^ How would you deal with people who keep insisting on giving you free and biased advices, without even completely understanding your situation. They think they are doing a great favour to you but actually telling you to compromise on your beliefs.
Re: Not puting oneself in someons's position and advising
talk to them, explain where you stand.
There are people who give advise..sometimes unsolicited (moi being very guilty of that), wo mean to help you and are trying to do it in th ebest way they know how to. intentions may be good but the views, pespectives, uderstanding of the situation etc may not be there. You can either further try to explain things to them or realize that they mean no harm but what they are saying does not work, and just let it go.
Then there are ppl who advise because they just want to be in your business. u can eithe rjust let that go in one ear and out the other, or stop them in their tracks. up to you :)
Re: Not puting oneself in someons's position and advising
^ well said brother. I understand that there are alot of people who are sincere with you and wish comfort for you but they sometimes fail to realize that our beliefs at times demand sacrifice, not worldly comfort and benefits.