Re: No to Jahez (Dowry from wife)= No to Bari/Vari/Bride Gold (Dowry from Husband)
It’s a highly encouraged pattern of behavior. It is not required if you can’t afford it. But if you can afford it, gift giving to your wife, including gold and jewelry is something that is mentioned even in hadith. You can certainly spend your money in other ways, but if you’re buying yourself fancy materialistic objects it would be next to assinine to not give gifts to your wife of a similar-luxury level.
And let’s be honest. How many wealthy Pakistani guys will spend their money on fancy cars and watches, and football games, etc? So ok, great. Now go buy her a gold set. (If that’s what she wants).