No Boxed Gifts Please...

Arts & Culture Culture, Arts, Literature & Linguistics
1

Why do ppl love to write that on their shaadi cards?? Why is it such an burden for the ppl getting married? I’m not too sure if the ppl that have this written on their shaadi cards really care about their guests…

  • “O people! Muhammad has no sons among ye men, but verily, he is the Messenger of Allah and the last in the line of Prophets. And Allah is aware of everything.” (33:40)

“The Hour will not come … until nearly thirty “dajjals” (liars) appear, each one claiming to be a messenger from Allah.” (Sahih Bukhari, Sahih Muslim)
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2

Recently, my friend got married and that was written on her card. I guess they dont want to put up with corny gifts, and prefer the money to buy their own things.

But still, its kinda wrong to write that on an invitation! If anything, the guests ought to be considerate and include a return receipt so that the newly-weds can return what they dont like, w/o offending the guests.

3

wht the?..wht this world is coming 2?..now v’ll have to ask ppl wht they want, how they want?..frankly speaking, i’ll prefer not to give any giftz to such ppl…they make me sick

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God bles u all…

DerVaisH

Ai khuda jazba-e-ehsaas na bakhsha hota…
Acha hota ager pather ka tarasha hota…
Waja-e-tehQeer hon insanon mein insan ho ker…
Pather ka hota to inhe insanon ne pooja hota…

4

Yea, it may be an "inconvenience" to the newly weds, but it's also an "inconvenience" for a guest who cannot afford to give large sums of money. For instance: if $25 dollars is the budget for the wedding gift..and on the wedding card it says that no boxed gifts...it makes the guest feel bad/cheap for only giving $25. On top of that, some ppl have to make comments on the amount because it didn't meet their "expectation" of $100 or more.

  • "O people! Muhammad has no sons among ye men, but verily, he is the Messenger of Allah and the last in the line of Prophets. And Allah is aware of everything." (33:40)

"The Hour will not come ... until nearly thirty "dajjals" (liars) appear, each one claiming to be a messenger from Allah." (Sahih Bukhari, Sahih Muslim)
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5

why can’t they be like normal poeple and register somewhere

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6

yeah i suppose registering is the best option.

the problem, you see, is lack of sincerity these days.

I mean a newly wed should be happy that people are happy for them and are giving them a gift, no matter how lame the newlyweds think it is.

On the other hand, is the gift given with sincerity, or just cuz its expected. I have received gifts that I have looked at & cringed, but then the problem is the whole reciprocity deal.

here is an example..people come to visit you and they bring some crapolla wrapped up. you look at it and wonder what the person was thinking…many times is recycled..they got something that they did not like and well lets pass it on. People say , oh well dont think about what you got, its the thought that counts. well what kinda thought really went behind passing some lame ass thing that you did not want for yourself to me..

The problem now is..when I have to give a gift to this person for something..should I just do the same thing, or should I actually be thoughtful and give them something that they will like.

I had written a post about the whole recycling gift theory and many people looked at is as being materialistic. I think its the opposite.

Get me a gift if you want to, dont feel obligated, if you do it does not have to be expensive, just sincere.

I mean there are only so many crystal vases, clocks and picture frames oen can use. That sort of junk is now going to charity.

If you are coming over to my place for dinner, we would appreciate some flowers or chocolates much more than a beat up old box of silver serving spoons circa 1989

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[This message has been edited by Fraudz (edited August 06, 2002).]

7

You won’t believe it, but this type of message first started appearing in Israel as a precaution after a couple of newly-weds (to their surprise) got a bomb as a gift. Lucky for them, it was a cheap one and didn’t go off as intended.

How about sending some anthrax for a Salami?

8

[quote]
Originally posted by NYAhmadi:
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How about sending some anthrax for a Salami? **
[/quote]

how about salami for salami?

9

Fraudia, Salami is haram. Unless it is Hungarian.

10

not necassarily..christian weddings in Pakistan have similar rituals and they can accept any salami for salami, does not have to be hungarian.

btw, whatchu got against italians?

11

you are missing the point here folks…in the old days..a barresaghiri shadi was much more than a non dinner event…a gift..a boxed gift..was not just a jora in a dabba or a tie/jurabein/vest in a dabba..it was a whole ball game…firstly, the person gifting it would have to write their name somewhere inside or outside the dabba, it would duly be registered by the massi or phophi of hte dulhan /dulha and be kept in a khufia store room which was always hands off to kids…a diary entry was made..YES a diary was skept to write down who gave what to whom and on what day of the shadi..that included dabba gifts as well as money…entries like…laal dabbai wala organza ka dupatta… shagufta (dulhans name

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) ki phopho saas nai ammi (dulhans mom ) kau baraat peh dia…2000 rupay nakad (in cash) shagufta keh jethani keh ammi nay diayay…
after the shadi, the diary would be consulted on the shadis of those who gave to their shadi…trust me, Ive seen printed diaries with columns like…paisay/tuhfa…rishta…tareekh…
on the dulhas side…on every backside of the money garland was written the name of the giver and amount of money stapled together…
so you see, no one has time to do all that..they just want money , its convenient to enter in the diary plus its better than receiving a jora form dulhay keh mamo ki dukhaan

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  • Uniform ideas originating among entire peoples unknown to each other
    must have a common ground of truth..*
12

Wedding gifts are a matter of taste. Usually the person who gives them choose according to his taste which is often not that of the couple. Why is why I suppose the whole "list in a shop" phenomenen started.

I have seen this "no boxed gifts" business happen only in two cases: where the couple were going to be living far away from where the wedding or reception was held. Add transportation to something you didn't want in the first place and a gift becomes a pain.

13

Of all the weddings my family and I have attended, only one didn't have a "no boxed gifsts" on their shaadi cards.

  • "O people! Muhammad has no sons among ye men, but verily, he is the Messenger of Allah and the last in the line of Prophets. And Allah is aware of everything." (33:40)

"The Hour will not come ... until nearly thirty "dajjals" (liars) appear, each one claiming to be a messenger from Allah." (Sahih Bukhari, Sahih Muslim)
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