Nikah vs Rukhsati

Why do desi parents opt for Nikah only when they can finish off the “whole ceremony” at one time?

might not want to?

maybe the daughters young, maybe in middle of studies, maybe not right time yet. maybe cant afford wedding... allsorts of reasons.

my sis had hetr nikah done an year ago …coz her hubby is abroad n he insisted it is practical to have nikah earlier so the paper workk gets done in time …instead of waiting long afterwards …now my sis is getting married (rukhsati) this weekend :crying:

plus having the nikah done beforehand allows a couple to get comfortable with each other in a halal manner.

veezay sheezay kay masayil hoatay haiN.. tum naheeN samjho geee


veezay sheezay kay masayil hoatay haiN.. tum naheeN samjho geee

HAHAHAHAHAHAA:rotfl: :rotfl:

YOu are so right buddy…!!!

Me and my boyfriend have been apart for as long as i can remember. This whole “VEEZA SHEEZA” thing is definitely what’s keeping us JUDA. I have to bring him over here, so he can adjust everything. FOR THAT TO BE DONE, I have to go through NIKAH. Once he comes here and settles, we will take off for Pakistan and get married there..!! how does that sound..?? EXCITING??? COMPLICATED??? EXPENSIVE?? BORING?? AWAITING??? whatever you want to call it…Things are not as easy as they seem..!!!
GET IT SIDRA?

[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by larki: *
plus having the nikah done beforehand allows a couple to get comfortable with each other in a halal manner.
[/QUOTE]

yea rite

most ppl i know just treat nikkah as an engagement nothing more. they're sitll not allowed to talk to each other, or it's frowned down upon

personally , if im still in college wheni get marreid, i wudnt mind sneakin around wit my hubby ...kinda like having a boyfriend, but halal..hehehe

I don't understand why it's done, as far as I know in our family there's no such thing as just the nikkah. After nikkah, islamically speaking a girl and boy are husband and wife. Rukhsati is a very desi tradition.

[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Sara516: *

yea rite

most ppl i know just treat nikkah as an engagement nothing more. they're sitll not allowed to talk to each other, or it's frowned down upon

personally , if im still in college wheni get marreid, i wudnt mind sneakin around wit my hubby ...kinda like having a boyfriend, but halal..hehehe
[/QUOTE]

its frowned down upon cuz parents dont completely trust the guy, n i guess theres more chances of breaking up but I dont see why u cant go out with ur own husband

it's true that people can break up more easily since usually the marriage isn't consummated during the nikah period due to purely cultural restrictions (i.e. waiting for the rukhsati) and as a result the divorce is "quick and easy" (without the waiting period and mahr "complications"), which causes some people take advantage of this. i know people who only seemed to want it so they could date in a halal manner and when they (or one of them) got bored with each other, they called it quits as if it was no big deal.

[QUOTE]
Originally posted by cat-woman: *
I don't understand why it's done, as far as I know in our family there's no such thing as just the nikkah. **After nikkah, islamically speaking a girl and boy are husband and wife.
* Rukhsati is a very desi tradition.
[/QUOTE]

100 % agree.Rest of the things are just idiotic.Nikah is the most important in islam not the Rukhsati then why people don't allow bride/groom to talk etc.

Thank you very much for the responses, I have to agree I learned a lot. So basically getting the Nikha done is like having a “halal boyfriend” and also just so the marriage can be broken up easily incase something were to go wrong.

A stupid concept!

:rotfl:

i was taking a shot at the ppl who seem to devalue something as sacred as the nikah and abuse it (i.e. to date and/or breakup easily), which is horrible and truly pathetic. maybe it would have made more sense if i had added an emoticon to express my frustration at the stupidity of that type of mentality.

as it has already been mentioned, the nikah is the actual marriage and a husband and wife can do whatever they want because they are halal for each other regardless of whether or not they have had their rukhsati because they is totally cultural.

:rotfl: :rotfl:

[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by cat-woman: *
I don't understand why it's done, as far as I know in our family there's no such thing as just the nikkah. After nikkah, islamically speaking a girl and boy are husband and wife. Rukhsati is a very desi tradition.
[/QUOTE]

i too agree with this, the nikkah is the wedding, end of! there shouldnt be mehndi or rukhsati ceremonies..however, i think the walima is meant to be compulsory.

i dnt get the point of dragging the wedding on and on..mehndi ceremony isnt even in islam...its a cultural tradition

i think weddings are overrated and silly stupid excuse for getting dressed up and gossiping about ppl!!

this is reason im not getting married!! :)

grrrrr...wats wrong with having a mehndi and walima? I do believe that a walima is mandatory, Islamically speaking. If it doesn't go against Islam, then why should culture be totally discarded? And, yes it is possible to have a proper Muslim wedding, where the guests will be separated, etc.

There should be more complaints against truly un-Islamic activities such as jahez , forced nikkahs, nikkah as an engagement, etc.

and yeah, what's wrong with getting dressed and looking pretty? Every bride wants to be beautiful on her big day. Even religious n pious ladies gotta look good on their shaadi :)

[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Sara516: *
grrrrr...wats wrong with having a mehndi and walima? I do believe that a walima is mandatory, Islamically speaking. If it doesn't go against Islam, then why should culture be totally discarded? And, yes it is possible to have a proper Muslim wedding, where the guests will be separated, etc.

There should be more complaints against truly un-Islamic activities such as jahez , forced nikkahs, nikkah as an engagement, etc.

and yeah, what's wrong with getting dressed and looking pretty? Every bride wants to be beautiful on her big day. Even religious n pious ladies gotta look good on their shaadi :)
[/QUOTE]

im not saying theres anything wrong with it..i jus dnt undertand the point

and of course the bride wants to look beautiful..shes the bride..no one can ever look better than the bride..no matter what she wears..

its just after so many family weddings...it kinda got me thinking as to what actually goes on during an islamic wedding...and im kinda confused

i dnt get the point of wasting all that money and inviting 200-500 ppl u dnt even know and have never met in ur life!!!

and they so unorganised!!!