I guess that means that you're okay with:
1) maintaining a spotless home and don't forget to get the cobwebs in the corners (and no you don't get to hire a housekeeper),
- Already do that and help my mom around the house when i am on vacation.
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2) inviting other couples on the weekend and cooking for a 20-person dawat,
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3 of us guys cooked for 50 people this weekend in Darfur. 20 people in a Western Country where you actually have power and ovens, pffft no bloody problem.
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3) driving the kids to school and all of their afterschool activities, including doing their homework with them and taking them to Islamic school,
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Been doing that for nephews and neices and cousins kids for a few years now.
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4) no complaints if she wants to support her family back home and the budget doesn't allow for the sparkly things you saw in the mall (like let's say the 40" plasma screen)
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This is contrary to your original example. Don't change the situation because you are irritated by most missy.
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5) the Maybach going to her rather than you - after all she's the one wining and dining the business clients - I guess that means you're stuck with the minivan
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Minivan? SUV. Porsche. Nothing less. And even then I am coming down a long way from a Mayback to a Porsche. Also snookums if she can afford one maybach, she can afford two.
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6) and at the end of your long day, you never get to plead a headache if you're tired.
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You are talking to a man. You know any man who is not ready to have sex?
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I'm a little surprised that more guys are not bothered by the idea that their wife earns signficantly more than them and that more women are okay with being the primary breadwinner in the family. I guess others of this board are more evolved than I am. For myself, I know that I wouldn't be happy if he couldn't support us (not with a lavish a lifestyle - but a modest one) on his salary and that my working was mandatory just to make ends meet.
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Why would it bother them? The fact that your assumptions are wrong should bother you more though. Reassess the way you view Pakistani men should be a start.