New member .. First post .. TTC :( ... x

[sonipari]

Re: New member .. First post .. TTC … x

@mirage

As much as the stress is not in one’s hands to control really, I think you need to have a re approach towards life. You are very lucky ma sha Allah, as it is, to have a very happy married life ma sha Allah. Why you want kids this bad is obviously because this is the next stage of one’s life. Marriage. and then kids. That is understood. But only because its like a tradition that in your family one gets pregnant right after marriage so you SHOULD be pregnant too doesnt make a possible sense to me. Its not like every one in the family has x house and y car so I should have one too.

Children are something you can never deliberately have or not have, for that matter. I know people who tried for as long as 15 years and were blessed then. I know people who are still issueless after 25 years of a very happy and healthy marriage. And I also know those who DID NOT WANT babies but had to have them in their early married life, without any plans or even a prethought. So one thing that you should basically tell yourself is that ITS NOT IN YOUR OR ANY ONE"S HANDS EXCEPT ALLAH.

I felt happy to read how you are keeping up with the namaz and you read durood shareef and you stay on prayer mat after mid night (the tahajud time, which is ma sha Allah very favorable for acknowledgement of one’s prayers). BUT BUT BUT we are not trading anything with Allah. What we do know is that He is Merciful and He never returns the prayers unfulfilled. Just a matter of time it is. So just hang on there, and In sha Allah, HE will listen soon.

Now the second part of my post is what worried me as well as kinda provoked me to post here too. you want children and you are afraid of PAIN? Well Pregnancy is NOT AN EASY RIDE. Ask the pregnanct women really, there much more than a glowing face and a lovely baby bump that a pregger has to go through. Just as much as pregnancy is not a disease, its NOT a fun time either. You have been pregnant already but maybe this time you will know how scared one actually commences this journey when one starts it full of longings and desires. I conceived after two years of marriage and Allah knows I would be scared to even put my foot on floor what if anything untoward happens! And these are only fears of losing something which is the precious most. And then there are problems, pain, during pregnancy and after. And then raising kids. My point basically being, you want kids? Be prepared. Be determined rather. If I were you, I would have happily gone for tests and anything that would help me get what I want. So come out of this confusion atleast. Babies or Pains. Because they both are synonymous anyway

You wanted some duas. There are plenty of them mentioned in the Quran, by the prophets. People are suggested to read them and their prayers are fulfilled too.

Supplication of Hazrat Ibrahim (2:128) and (37:100)
Supplication of Hazrat Zachariah (3:38) and (21:89)

These duas are very effective ma sha Allah. I hope you will find them easily in Quran and they will be helpful too. May Allah bless you with naik and saleh aulad soon. Ameen.

Thankyou soo much mirage for you kind words … I do understand what your telling me but sometimes when youre in that situation you something dont want to .. I know that when Allah Paak Jee will decide its the right time only then I will be blessed with children not before or after ..nothing can change that .. I also understand that pregnancy is not pain free .. lol everyone always messes with me saying ‘your sooo scared of everyhting how are you ever gna have a baby’ but still that doesnt make me stop wanting a baby .. I just hope that I have strength to take the pain and get through it when the time comes inshallah ..
thankyou for the duas I’ll definitly recite them .. I do appriciate you helping me x