Re: Need some advice…
This is a very common issue faced by Pakistani living in the west. Your parents would have had good intentions for you and of course the girl but many things are never what they seem. Obviously the girl sounds to be very young and her parents are happy that you chose their daughter as she is of marriagable age and can live abroad in an environment which would be relatively peaceful and calm compared to Pakistan. Also as you have lived I suppose for quite some time in a western country you are used to the routine there but was not able to find anyone suitable in your western country, don’t know which country that is as yes it is hard to find someone suitable in the west. But going back to Pakistan and trying to find someone there in these times is quite a risky venture. The girl of course would not want to displease her parents and not say no. Also did you meet before hand in person before the marriage too place or did you just meet over the internet Whatsapp, Facetime etc. I am surprised that if you were born and raised abroad you could not find someone suitable in your country of birth. Your new wife could be behaving this way to try and control you or the situation, I think she is teething like a toddler does but for Pakistani women in particular it is a bit different they do find it hard to adjust to a western country on own. I think the best option is to cut your losses and just end the relationship as if already she is starting to act like this, imagine in day to day regular life how she will behave. IF she is not flexible now then what makes you think in the future she will be normal. Also there are many factors and variables to consider, don’t know much about your personality or appearance, maybe she is not attracted to you. Also will you give her a good lifestyle? there are many questions to consider and she is probably thinking now I have to submit to this man forever and he is not exactly what I wanted especially at this moment in my life, she might be quite young, don’t know her age. How old are you? What is the age difference like? Which background are you from and which background is she from, eg is she Pathan and you are Sindhi are you memon and she is punjabi, regional differences are there too. How will her lifestyle be like now married, did you have open conversation prior to marriage as to what are your expectations and her expectations in terms of daily living, like household chores, cleaning, budgeting, whether you want her to work? will she be able to study or work or just be a lady of leisure as you can provide a great lifestyle. so many variables to consider. Is she a social media addict, are you a video game addict. Also economically are you and her in equal footing, like are you from a middle class western background and she is from an upper or slightly lower economic class background in Pakistan like which region is she from? Also did you want to find someone from Pakistan intentionally as then you can control the woman? as a locally based woman it is not about control but they are knowledgable about how things are done and maybe you wanted a younger, more docile woman and who might be economically from a lower class than yours?
Many factors play a role as you can see in determining how a person reacts in desi culture in marriages and relationships in general. Also if it very stressful now when it has not really started, then consider how it will be over a year and years? Why are her parents very happy you have taken her off their shoulders? are they from a poorer background or think the grass is way better abroad and she is now out of our system at a young age, she is now your responsibility.
Better stop can write a thesis, many questions to consider see. it is all complicated as human beings are difficult.
Hope this helps.
hope these ideas help.