** little problems are NOT real problems...they come and go and act like cement and bond the two together in a stronger bond :)**
then y do people complain soooooooooooo much that shaadi ye hai,wo hai,v r fed up,offended,bla bla...
then y do people complain soooooooooooo much that shaadi ye hai,wo hai,v r fed up,offended,bla bla...
well everything has its ups and downs...I mean in a marriage u are sharing ur room...so imagine...u both need space..u both need to have your own private time as well...people do get frustrated because you have to become one with your partner and that always isn't the case...there will be days where u will argue, fight..but at the end of the day you'll still have someone who loves, cares for you and will always be there for you.
Imagine living in the same room with ur sister for 5+ years..you guys are bound to fight. Forget sister..imagine sharing an apartment with your best friend...I've heard so many girls..guys even fight with their roommates over silly stuff.
heck my and my sister share a bathroom...she always has to use it when I need to go...that gets me pissed and we end up fighting over the bathroom.
You know what else...people tend to complain a lot more than appreciate. Sadly women complain too much over the smallest things. I've heard my mom complain about my dad..and my dad to me is the perfect husband.
Don't let people scare you..I too am afraid of marriage..but you just have to make dua and trust Allah (SWT).
Rather than listening to complaints, ask those same people how they manage to keep their marraige going, how they resolve their complaints/issues. That just might help you be less afraid of marriage.
they r conspiring to keep u a sinister so they can later say"aray iti umer ho gayee.ab tak shadi nahi ki. bhala ye bhi koi zindagi hai"... really ppl shouldn't be discussing probs with single ppl
^Mabs right.
Ever heard of the saying, "Shadi aisa ladoo hai, jo khai woh pachtaye, aur jo na khaye woh bhi pachtaye."
That's exactly how our twisted desi society works. They are saying that you are "lucky that you're single" because right now you're still young. But once you get to your mid and late twenties, then they'll be chiding you for not having gotten married earlier. Basically, you can't win.
Pray to Allah that He blesses you with partner that is compatible to you. And remind yourself that ALL relationships are imperfect. It's human nature for us to blow things way out of proportion. For example, let's say that you and your best friend have a wonderful relationship most of the time. Then one day she hurts you with some careless remark or action. So you will complain and complain and complain and complain and complain and complain to the whole world about her as if she were your worst enemy. It's human nature for us to talk little about the wonderful aspects of our relationships, but then when something bad happens, we can't stop talking about it.
Your aunt, sis, etc complain about marriage. But I bet if you told these women to leave their husbands behind and live separately for the rest of their lives.....they would change their minds and make excuses, lol. If we can get into arguments with our own parents, who brought us into this world, then we can get into arguments WITH ANYONE and EVERYONE! It's a part of life that will never change.
Here's my advice. When dealing with a rishta, do a thorough investigation and get to know the guy well. Pray for the best and take steps to secure yourself. Complete your education if you haven't done so already. It's good to have a functioning college degree so that you can get a job to support your marriage and also to support yourself in case your marriage fails. Have confidence and respect in yourself, and know your Islamic rights as a muslim woman/wife.
Re: My problem
Dont forget that these women may only be sharing their dukhs, sorrows, problems and unhappy marital affairs. that doesn't mean that they don't have their fair share of sukh, happiness, success and happy marriage.
Neha, it's human nature to mostly share dukh than sukh. For example, one can tell others oh my husband hated my cooking today and told me not to make it ever again and tat made me upset but it's rare that some1 will go around sharing tat my husband liked the food i cooked (esp if he likes it everyday). Everyday normal good things are not shared and is not normal to share either of a marriage life but tat doesnt mean marriage is bad or painful.
There's always happy ending! (i think)