Many years ago, I stumbled upon this book written by Tehmina Durrani while I was visiting my khala in India. I read the entire book in one sitting as it was a well written autobiography by a talented and dynamic young lady from our cultural background, with a twisted thrill and unthinkable corruption and its shattering effects on a family.
Please share your views on this book.
Re: My Feudal Lord
A very bold writing during the days when it was hard to openely talk or write about a famous politician. Khar was on a downhill but still had lots of power when she wrote the book.
One thing is, though she never tried to hide, but the fact that she also left her own husband and kids to marry a person who was married 6 times, left a very little sympathy for her from the reader
Re: My Feudal Lord
Actually I don't know much about them other than from the book itself as I am not originally from Pakistan.
Many years ago, I stumbled upon this book written by Tehmina Durrani while I was visiting my khala in India. I read the entire book in one sitting as it was a well written autobiography by a talented and dynamic young lady from our cultural background, with a twisted thrill and unthinkable corruption and its shattering effects on a family.
Please share your views on this book.
She (Tehmi) mentions about her visits to Majed Ali and Zehra Nigah's apartment at Knights Bridge--near Harrods..where poetic gatherings
were held and she was thrilled with the doha's of my dad....who was living in London then (1970-71).
Tehmi was there with her Dad...S.U.Durrani (Shakirullah Durrani)
and Mom Samina....when Durrani Saheb was the Chairman PIA
and later became Governor State Bank Of Pakistan.
During his PIA tenure--I had but few opportunities to meet Tehmi
at theirs in Karachi. She is indeed a very charming and articulated person
but then who doesn't make mistakes..in certain tender decisions of life!!
Re: My Feudal Lord
Oh Wow Arjay Sahab! Did she ever mention what she was going through in her personal life?
Re: My Feudal Lord
Was a great book...
I never looked at Kher the same again.
Re: My Feudal Lord
Amazinggg, very well written and a bit of an eye opener, I also love the work she does for the dupilex smile foundation. Funnily enough my friends aunt is married to Mustafa Kaur's brother! Eeeeeek!
Re: My Feudal Lord
I read it a few months ago and thought it was an okay book. I found her to be very hypocritical and indecisive. She left her first husband and her daughter to marry Khar, had an illicit affair with him prior to the marriage even though she knew he was already married. She knew how he treated Sherry (who interestingly enough is model Amna Haq's mom) but yet believed he would treat her like a normal person. I cringed everytime she wrote how she was 'ready' to leave him and yet was back in the marriage despite of being beaten, abused and what not. It must have been in the book atleast 10 times and that sounded really stupid to me. Another thing was that she and her family were portrayed to be so religious- they wouldn't accept her second marriage, she turned to praying all the time and that's where she found peace, etc etc yet she openly discussed how they would enjoy any good occasion by drinking alcohol i.e champagne with her brother when he helped her escape in London. And even when she wrote about her mother to be so conservative and all, she mentioned how she would consume alcohol as well. To me that was very hypocritical, and just plain scary because it sounds as if alot of elitist in Pakistan actually consider drinking to be okay.
But the biggest surprise is that now she's married to Shahbaz Shareef (Nawaz Shareef's brother)! How can someone, who has been through so many turmoils being married to a politician, just go ahead and marry another one?? I just found that to be very weird and so did my mother in law when the two us were discussing the book, lol.
Overall, good read.
Re: My Feudal Lord
It was definitely a good read but like you said, a totally screwed up image of one part of our society!
Oh Wow Arjay Sahab! Did she ever mention what she was going through in her personal life?
Bibi...at that time she hasn't gone through--whatever--she has scribed in her book *MEINDA'SAIEEN !!*
On a personal note--I thought she is a very decent women and a highly articulated one.
Moreover...I met her but a few (4-5) times only...at her Dad's ...that's it!
And please....no SAHAB business with me....I hate and despise that word!!
Khush rahein...
Not only family whole country I think, **Ittna ghinawna, ghaleez or **zalimana kirdar ujagar kiya hai na Pakistani siasat danon ka(waisy tu sariduniya hi ky hi aise hain) or on ky chamchon ka ky bas Alaman Alhafez .Khas kerWahan mujhy os ky asli pehly shohar per
ty bara tras aya jab osy swiming pool main dubkiya dy dy ker mun neela ker dyty hain or Khar khabees os ki bivi ky sath munh kala kerny laga hota hy:crying:
Re: My Feudal Lord
wow ns, you read the whole thing in one go? u must be a book worm! hehe
I read it a while back, but I must say the real incentive for me was to read more about Ghulam Mustafa Khar, as his karnamaz were pretty famous and adults would often have tongue in cheek references to him and lets just say curiosity killed the billa.
SO I should just call you RJ 
?
Re: My Feudal Lord
There is always either way to perceive things too… I found this book worth reading about the facts she disclose and boldly she didn’t try to hide anything bad about her own self , and dual nature of our society .....(han it sounds like funny if she try to pretend her self in a sympathetic way she made mistakes just as an immature girl )
Some people say the book was supported by people in power to give khar/PPP a badname. im pretty much sure there is some truth in the book but its her own point of view and probably a biased relfection of how things really were.
She was obviously very attracted to charismatic and strong men - maybe because she saw her father as a weak hen-pecked husband with no power.
Was Shabaz Sharif married when he met tehmina?
The thing I liked about the book is that it gives an insight to the high society of pakistan - we all know what happens but no one had dared to write about it. She mentions alcohol consumption, extra-marital affirs, sex with minors very freely.....all punishable offences in pakistan....
it was a good read.....a good mix of her feminine insecuirty- she was seen as darker skinned, lack of a father figure, domestic violence, elitism in poor countries, illicit sexual relations, family turmoil, favouritism amongst mothers, party politics in pakistan, the zia regime, feudalism....
Sure…RJ–ARJAY–RAJU—KAJU…whatever you deem best!
No attitude problems here!
Khush Rahein…
No female in the right mind wud live with a person as "brutal" as Khar.. she speaks of his values his affairs with her sister Zarmina etc etc.. and she completely overlooks how she left her husband for an already married man! Some of it could be true, but majority of it appears fake!
Re: My Feudal Lord
^she doesn't overlook that from what i seem to recall, intead she says this (being khar) is the punishment for my sins . it is an eye opener for average muslim of pakistan as it was for me. paints an extremely bleak picture of the sordid morals elite possess. i give it points for being deadly honest.
Re: My Feudal Lord
Im reading this book at the moment. True or not, its a good read.