No he doesn't make notes....my biggest pet peeve!!
His idea of test preparation is staring the book, that too if i make him sit down. I often think he isn't concentrating n ask a question which he almost always gets right. But if i ask him to pen down the answer, he would take HOURS!! In the end we are not left with much time to cover everything.
May be he does not need to take notes, some kids have very good memory ( photographic memory) and comprehension , he seems to be one of those kids. Do not push him to the extent that he starts hating you , despising you and become rebellious or depressed. Work with him , adjust to his style of studies and work habits , do not try to change those habits upside down or as you like them to be, help him tweak those a little , again a little , if they need tweaking.
Being a strict parent is not something to be proud of , you need to let the kids grow , glow and thrive . Yes maintaining discipline and balance essential to being good parent but being strict is not required to do so.
Yes we all get frustrated sometime when our expectations are not met by our kids , in that case we have to step back and look at those expectations and try to address the following questions:
1. Are those expectations reasonable ?
2. Is my child capable of meeting those expectations ?
3. What have I done to help the kid to meet those expectations ?
4. Why is he/she not able to meet those expectations ?
5. What can I do to improve the results ?
6. What can the kid do to improve the results ?
^
I'm sorry if I came across as a parent who takes pride in being strict. I was actually confessing. ;(
You know, I'm not strict by choice...i am actually the only parent living with my kids, hubby works abroad. And im sure you know, boys are hard ti raise in the absence of a male figure. I try to be supportive most of the time but since the other link is missing in our case, I have to play his role as well. Alhamdulillah he too is daily with us over Skype but I hope you understand that situations with kids at home are often too dynamic and coming on skype for an hour doesn't substitute presence of a father. I'm here on this board just because I feel I need another perspective to sort our problem. If I were I-know-it-all type, I wouldn't really ask for opinions.
You are right! His memory is mashaAllah very good, no doubt. But I just want to figure out a way to help him reflect his potential. I have mashaAllah 4 kids and all are school going... Each of them is different and needs attention. Being just an average person, I keep struggling to find out ways how best to help them. I know quite a few parents and some other really talented and helpful people like milly and you give good advice, hence I started the thread.
Afia, you are not a strict parent at all, if you were you wouldnt be asking for help. Please do not feel you need to defend your parenting skills.
I got your email. Completely forgot that I already had it. Yes, I really am that blonde :/
I have the templates saved at school and again, completely forgot to save them onto my memory stick, so cant email them to you tonight. I shall try my very best to remember tomorrow. Hope you dont mind waiting a little!
