I OFTEN wonder whether people see me as a radical, fundamentalist Muslim terrorist packing an AK-47 assault rifle inside my jean jacket. Or may be they see me as the poster girl for oppressed womanhood everywhere. I’m not sure which it is.
I get the whole gamut of strange looks, stares, and covert glances. You see, I wear the hijab, a scarf that covers my head, neck, and throat. I do this because I am a Muslim woman who believes her body is her own private concern.
Young Muslim women are reclaiming the hijab, reinterpreting it in light of its original purpose to give back to women ultimate control of their own bodies.
The Qur’an teaches us that men and women are equal, that individuals should not be judged according to gender, beauty, wealth, or privilege. The only thing that makes one person better than another is her or his character.
Nonetheless, people have a difficult time relating to me. After all, I’m young, Canadian born and raised, university educated why would I do this to myself, they ask.
Strangers speak to me in loud, slow English and often appear to be playing charades. They politely inquire how I like living in Canada and whether or not the cold bothers me. If I’m in the right mood, it can be very amusing.
But, why would I, a woman with all the advantages of a North American upbringing, suddenly, at 21, want to cover myself so that with the hijab and the other clothes I choose to wear, only my face and hands show?
Because it gives me freedom.
WOMEN are taught from early childhood that their worth is proportional to their attractiveness. We feel compelled to pursue abstract notions of beauty, half realizing that such a pursuit is futile.
When women reject this form of oppression, they face ridicule and contempt. Whether it’s women who refuse to wear makeup or to shave their legs, or to expose their bodies, society, both men and women, have trouble dealing with them.
In the Western world, the hijab has come to symbolize either forced silence or radical, unconscionable militancy. Actually, it’s neither. It is simply a woman’s assertion that judgment of her physical person is to play no role whatsoever in social interaction.
Wearing the hijab has given me freedom from constant attention to my physical self. Because my appearance is not subjected to public scrutiny, my beauty, or perhaps lack of it, has been removed from the realm of what can legitimately be discussed.
No one knows whether my hair looks as if I just stepped out of a salon, whether or not I can pinch an inch, or even if I have unsightly stretch marks. And because no one knows, no one cares.
Feeling that one has to meet the impossible male standards of beauty is tiring and often humiliating. I should know, I spent my entire teenage years trying to do it. It was a borderline bulimic and spent a lot of money I didn’t have on potions and lotions in hopes of becoming the next Cindy Crawford.
The definition of beauty is ever-changing; waifish is good, waifish is bad, athletic is good – sorry, athletic is bad. Narrow hips? Great. Narrow hips? Too bad.
Women are not going to achieve equality with the right to bear their breasts in public, as some people would like to have you believe. That would only make us party to our own objectification. True equality will be had only when women don’t need to display themselves to get attention and won’t need to defend their decision to keep their bodies to themselves
Very good. :)
ramesha,
Before I begin, I would like to say that my response is to the author's thoughts....
My O My!!!
Yet another Hijabi claiming the Holier than thou status.....
and dragging Men through the mud in that process!
She states,
"Because my appearance is not subjected to public scrutiny,..."
And then goes on to say,
"I get the whole gamut of strange looks, stares, and covert glances."
Hmm....
"Feeling that one has to meet the impossible male standards of beauty is tiring and often humiliating."
She fails to venture out of her limited ideas and Recognise the Fact, that
there are women who try to look nice etc., NOT because they are meeting some "impossbile male standards of beauty.."
Rather, it is something they do for THEMSELVES....NOTHING to do with Men.
Honestly, even though men are blamed, cursed and vilified for Oggling women,
most don't have the time or the interest, to do it for every female that happens to cross their paths...beautiful or not....
Hijabi or not...
She further says,
"I spent my entire teenage years trying to do it. It was a borderline bulimic and spent a lot of money I didn't have on potions and lotions in hopes of becoming the next Cindy Crawford."
That sure is Sad....
And I guess she took care of her "Problem" by starting to wear the Hijab..
Well, if she feels comfortable and more in control wearing the Hijab, more Power to her.
But to advocate the Hijab on the grounds she has and to give the impression that those who don't CHOOSE to wear the Hijab,
are some how, either in the Problem phase that She herself was in,
Or are Catering to some Male Demands/Requirements....Is an Ridiculous argument....
If she is that much in Peace with her Hijabi status, then she wouldn't need to write such articles which come across as a desire for some kind of a validation, deserving a Pat on the back or a Bravo....
I quote: WOMEN are taught from early childhood that their worth is proportional to their attractiveness. We feel compelled to pursue abstract notions of beauty, half realizing that such a pursuit is futile.
Well shouldn't reform start from there?
Beauty can be described in many ways and is different for different people. Maybe women should be taught they shouldn't pursue these absurd notions of beauty but concentrate on other qualities.
Wrapping yourself up in long cloths may make you feel safe for a while but it can be an illusion of safety and a poor substitute for finding the courage to meet issues head on in an independent and responsible way. That second act is what really takes courage and I take my hat off to all women, hijab or not, who have found the courage to face and resolve important issues of our time. The hijab is a non-issue.
The way I figure, if she believes she is doing a good thing, and she aint hurting no one, let her be. She doesn't bother me, just because I don't cover my hair. I know I used to, and felt the way she does now. I also remember how attacked I was by nonhijabis (as I am now).
Women need to be able to live with each other, and not feel insecure around each other..whether it be for clothing (concealing/revealing) or for anything else.
My two cents.
Nahied whatever,
I am glad to hear that you have taken care of your problem by wearing a hijab...Just make sure you dont start feeling superioe to the ones who take care of their problems by doing the entire opposite..
I am glad you said you are taking control by wearing one ( whatever might be the magnitude of that control ..not much I suspect)..again , please dont feel "better" then the ones who do the same thing by doing the entire opposite..
Men are BAD folks that try to judge you for your body.....some woman choose to use that to their advantage by revealing more,,,,, others by reavealing less...
Critics will always remain critics, its in their blood. So we have seen many here on this forum & I guess we have Dehatan who has also taken the oath of being a critic. Not appreciate of this girl's actions that she is wearing Hijab in a society today that is totally secular.
PS.It does not matter which contry you reside in, all countried are secular & there are no Islamic countries in the world at this time.
With due respect to all my fellow participants, I would say:
[quote]
Women are not going to achieve equality with the right to bear their breasts in public, as some people would
like to have you believe. That would only make us party to our own objectification. True equality will be had
only when women don't need to display themselves to get attention and won't need to defend their decision
to keep their bodies to themselves
[/quote]
Damn! RIGHT you are Naheed Mustafa.
Keep it up!
Nadeem
I think the writer suffers from a huge self-confidence problem.
Naheed said:
"Women are not going to achieve equality with the right to bear their breasts in public, as some people would like to have you believe."
First the question is of baring and not bearing breasts. All females of the species bear breasts, most choose not to bare them.
Second, I seriously question whether many people really believe that this issue is at all relevant to the question of achieving equality. They are two completely separate things.
I agree with Shirin here.
Shirin,
Thanks for your mammary elaboration, however, I'm certain most of us here understood what Naheed actually meant ("slip of the pen....eh... key is no fault of the mind"), without your education on the female anatomy. Nevertheless the second point you made is indeed valid, but "baring ones breasts" could have simply been used as a metaphore.
dear blitz...
can't you see it was tongue in cheek?
Assalam To You ALL...
Firstly, I would like to applaude Naheed for accepting Allah's law. This should be a lesson for the rest of us.
Secondly, I would just like the brothers and sisters who are suspicious of her motives. Instead of questioning her motives, why cant you simply be proud that someone has decided to embrace Islam, despite the problems she seems to have faced?
I believe that you should 'live and let live'. Do not criticise others and you will not be criticised. Be proud of Islam and all it has to offer, instead of worrying about what someone else has said or done.
Remember, your deeds will be weighed on the Day of Judgement, and you will not get any brownie points for suspecting others and questioning their actions.
Inshallah I have not offended anyone. Fell free to reply...
Allah Hafiz,
Saiqa
Sister Saiqa
Please Re-read your phrases,
"live and let live"
and
"...instead of worrying about what someone else has said or done."
Also, when you say,
"...why cant you simply be proud that someone has decided to embrace Islam,...."
If one of the Reasons or Need, for Islam followers, is to have Mere Mortals be proud of them,
instead of focusing Only on HIM, their CREATOR, the ALMIGHTY, for whom they are doing all that they are doing, then their Faith is indeed in a SAD state...
May Allah show them the TRUE Light...
[This message has been edited by Dehatan (edited May 26, 2000).]
Salaamz
Naheed Mustafa..is a very good writer/journalist.
Her family is, mashallah, wonderful indeed, her childern are intelligent and bright, mashallah.
Although there is an age difference between us…I’ve grown up with her and Allhamdulilah…she was one of the first people who opened my eyes to the concept of the Hijab.
May Allah swt bless her family.
Sister Dehatan,
You appear to have misunderstood my meaning. I was simply stating that we as human beings often have the tendency to question other people's actions. For example, when one chooses to wear the hijab, many people will go out of their way to distort this decision. Some people may see it as attention seeking, others may see it as seeking others approval. Only the One will ever know a person's true intention.
I cannot stand the hypocrisy that people of today indulge in. Parents today for example question other people's daughters and yet their own daughters are doing exactly the same things. Do you understand what I mean?
I am not saying that we must 'worship' another mortal, far from it. But what I am saying is that why cant people appreciate what another does, instead of assuming that they must be up to no good?
Maybe a little appreciation and some respect for other Muslims might do the Muslim community a lot of good?
I hope I have stated my case in the best way possible. Anyone wishing to reply can do so...
Allah Hafiz
hina, i would like to know more about her. has she written a book yet?
Me too Hinna!!
Nadeem