If you’re not sure to the answer on a true/false quiz, just write “maybe.” Sometimes, the teacher will give you credit because it made him/her laugh.
PHILOSOPHY: The study of not having a real job.
POETRY: Clever rambling
People don’t go to work on Labor Day. Why don’t we call every other day “Vacation Day” then?
I think the decision not to blow up my school was probably a good one.
Reach out and touch someone…just not me.
If we only use 10% of our brains, getting 90% of my brain removed wouldn’t bother me…but it does.
If we really had touched the moon, don’t you think we’d have built a mall there by now?
Judging books by their covers is actually quite accurate.
All you need is love. And money. And fame. And a nice car. Uh, forget love.
To completely ruin someone else’s yearbook picture, wear an “I’m With Stupid” shirt on picture day.
When people say, “Correct me if I’m wrong…” they don’t really mean it.
Adam and Eve were told it was a no-pressure situation, but they sure felt obligated.
The Terminator: Did anyone ever question why a cyborg from the future, in America, built by Americans, to save Americans, spoke with an Austrian accent?
THE EARLY WORM GETS EATEN BY THE BIRD.