No she will not become unstable. After lots of refusal - she has agreed to marry. So she is PREPARED to move on. She understands that he is no more, and is therefore married now to someone else.
I would not like to BURY those letters. This is no bollywood movie - where the dying hubby says - don't give - and then all the emotional dramas start - until the newly married wife 's daughter/son is 18 years old and looking for the "truth" about his/her previous husband (and some hidden letters).
Stop the bolly nonsense. Just give it to her.
You might be bawly lover I'm sure not. I'm bawly hater. lol
now i m getting stressed!!
i dont want to ruin her new marriage!
i dont want to break the promise of a dying person who was my good friend!
i dont want to hurt my friend by denying her her right of receiving the letters that r addressed to her cuz she has phoned my a billion times to remind me her that her wedding anniversary is coming and she needs the third letter!!
and not that i m only on the third letter what do i do with the rest of them!!!
I'm sorry Mahiay...hugs! I hope this all gets sorted out soon. How about this....
Since your friend is persistently bugging you....tell her why you feel you shouldn't show her the letters. Tell her the truth about your dying friend's wish. And then tell her that since that was his wish, that YOU feel that YOU BOTH (you and her) should HONOR his wishes. And let her make the decision instead of you. Let her decide if she wants to honor her husband's dying request and choose NOT to see the letters......or she can choose to see them. Let her decide what to do after you tell her the truth.....since she's bugging u about it. And since she's already read the first two......just tell her the truth. And give HER the choice of honoring the wishes or reading them. After all, u did you part of informing her.
Even though I would want to see those letters...its better if she doesnt see them. The reasoning is simple: she is human and can only take so much. Watching your husband die from cancer at a young age has got to be traumatic, to say the least. If you give them to her, they might take her down that same road and push her further away from a new life that is awaiting her right now.
She has been through a lot and deserves to be happy, dont give them to her. If she persists, say you dont have them anymore.
I'm sorry Mahiay...hugs! I hope this all gets sorted out soon. How about this....
Since your friend is persistently bugging you....tell her why you feel you shouldn't show her the letters. Tell her the truth about your dying friend's wish. And then tell her that since that was his wish, that YOU feel that YOU BOTH (you and her) should HONOR his wishes. And let her make the decision instead of you. Let her decide if she wants to honor her husband's dying request and choose NOT to see the letters......or she can choose to see them. Let her decide what to do after you tell her the truth.....since she's bugging u about it. And since she's already read the first two......just tell her the truth. And give HER the choice of honoring the wishes or reading them. After all, u did you part of informing her.
I think you'll feel relief if you just tell your friend the truth. The reason why you are under stress right now is because you're hiding all this from her and trying to make decisions by yourself. They are not your decisions to make.
They are her letters. They were written for her by her former husband. And she **was the one who asked him to write them. And **she is the one who keeps on asking u about them.
I was thinking that if you lie and tell her u lost them....she'll get mad and that can harm ur friendship with her.
.
So hun, just tell her the truth. Telling her the truth DOES NOT make you guilty of breaking a promise u made to her husband.....you're only telling the truth and also telling her that you have no wish to betray his wish and that u hope she won't betray his wish either.
Then leave the FINAL DECISION to her. She can follow husband's wish or she can break it. It will fall on her. And u won't have the stress of making any ultimate decisions. Let the person who the letter belongs to MAKE the ULTIMATE DECISION. They are not ur letters, it is not your decision. SIMPLE.
Your friend is an ADULT and a MARRIED WOMAN....she's old enough to decide for herself. ** U** only have 2 jobs. ** First*.....tell her the **truth. **Second*......advise her to honor previous husbands wishes and move on with her second marriage.
That's all you have to do. Free yourselfby telling her the truth and your feelings.