meri pehli koshish Hazire khidmat he ..

Mehfil · April 10, 2003, 10:44am

dhooNdta hooN main jafaa ke teri ghaflat ke sabab
dil ko ab toRne wali wo qayaamat ke sabab

muntaqil honaa tere shehr se manzoor na tha
kis ko ginwaaoN takaaleef ye hijrat ke sabab

khamre eHraam ke baa’is bekhabar banta hooN aaj
mujh se ab poochh na saaqi meri raahat ke sabab

wo to ReHmaaN he Kareem aur wo Razzaaq bhi he
haaN ke YazdaaN ko zaroori naheeN rehmat ke sabab

aks aa’eene meiN us ko bhi nazar aata he
phir mujhe pooche he kyooN meri aqeedat ke sabab

misle baaraN jo meri aaNkh se aaNsoo heiN rawaaN
ho ga seraab chaman meri museebat ke sabab

maiN ke laazakham seene pe sahe heiN teri chaahat ke sabab

guhr ke sadaf to saaHil pe agar milte heiN
un mein bante heiN to moti teri soorat ke sabab

dil meiN jo raaze muHabbat mere pinhaaN heiN
un ko afshaaN maiN karooN kese sharaafat ke sabab

aap ke raye ki muntazir

Khaaksaar

Mehfil

Munir · April 10, 2003, 10:55am

welcome zabard10 koshish

Amal · April 10, 2003, 1:23pm

Re: meri pehli koshish Hazire khidmat he ..

[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Mehfil: *

muntaqil honaa tere shehr se manzoor na tha
kis ko ginwaaoN takaaleef ye hijrat ke sabab

misle baaraN jo meri aaNkh se aaNsoo heiN rawaaN
ho ga seraab chaman meri museebat ke sabab

[/QUOTE]

Welcome to GS. Hope to see more of your work:)

Azad · April 10, 2003, 1:47pm

Welcome :k:

Dilsay · April 10, 2003, 6:06pm

Nice try please keep it up

Philanthrope · April 10, 2003, 7:31pm

Nice effort! keep it up... and Welcome to GS...

ameen · April 10, 2003, 7:57pm

ache koshish hay. keep it up. and welcome to GS

HeArT_HaCKeR · April 10, 2003, 8:01pm

Wow very nice

Welcome to Gs pal :)

ghazal_kisi_ke · April 10, 2003, 11:22pm

nice kohsis:k::k:
welcome and keep it up:)

chand_chehra · April 11, 2003, 12:39am

very nice :k:
thanks for sharing

Guest7777 · April 11, 2003, 2:12am

Welcome mehfil and great job :) look forward to reading more of your poetry.

NikamiJano · April 11, 2003, 2:52am

nice koshish and welcome is Mehfil main ..:)

Nazam · May 9, 2003, 3:48pm

lajavab koshish

congratulations mehfil

Amarbail · May 9, 2003, 4:21pm

Well done SA :k:

Mehfil · May 9, 2003, 4:28pm

SA what is SA? zawanfira why you are calling me SA?

WiseGuy · May 9, 2003, 5:44pm

Bohat khoob, pehli hee kaavish safal rahee…
Masha Allah… keep it up :k:

_Nazish · May 9, 2003, 5:51pm

bohat khoob :-)

Zakhmi_Umar · May 23, 2003, 7:28am

Re: meri pehli koshish Hazire khidmat he ..

very Nice Mehfil ur Pehli koshish hi itni zabardast hai tu in future tu aap chaa jao gi very good :k:

Azad · May 23, 2003, 7:36am

aks aa’eene meiN us ko bhi nazar aata he
**phir mujhe pooche he kyooN meri aqeedat ke sabab **

Excellent .. :k:

2nd line phir say lekhain ghar munasib samjhain… jitna khayal acha hay .. ussi lehaz say lafzon ki tarteeb bhi ho jay to kia baat hay.