Re: Men and fantasies – yuck!
^ How very Monsoon Wedding.. chic really!!! :k:
Re: Men and fantasies – yuck!
What? 
I didn’t watch the movie.
Re: Men and fantasies – Disturbing!
Explain, explain…I dont want to assume that you are being chased by your chacha, mama, phuppa…
Re: Men and fantasies -- yuck!
I agree with Matsui. Someone in your family, perhaps an elder, should address this issue with this man. He may be harbouring these sexual fantasies about his niece in his mind, and then again he may be acting them out with some other child. We really don't know the situation, but it needs to be dealt with.
Also, it's quite disgusting in the sense that he was the older one of the two. The girl may have been at fault for leading him on (just my assumption), but he was the older father figure there. The ultimate responsibility of keep his feelings and cravings in control is on his shoulders, not the girls. Again, I say this cause he was the older, more responsible figure here being an "uncle" and all.
Re: Men and fantasies -- yuck!
That is not an issue of sexual fantasies. It is that of incest. I suggest you get some of the men in the family to beat up your uncle. He deserves it.
Though following latest scientific research, men being attracted to younger grils is very much biological and natural. It is pre-programed so to speak. But with family? He needs to be seriously abused.
Re: Men and fantasies – yuck!
if there is anyone who shud be told off…its the girl’s parents…phuppas and chachas are the same stock as yr daivars and jaiths and behnoees…if u can keep them away from yrslef u wud know how to keep them away from yr daughters…
Re: Men and fantasies -- yuck!
Men can have their fantasies. But this sounds like it's progressed beyond just a private desire. It is incest and wrong in every way. Why hasn't this Uncle been confronted by the girl's father? From what I've heard about sexual predators there is a power trip aspect. If an abuser knows he is getting away with something he becomes reckless and will not hide the situation. If there is no sharam in him, then he can really exploit and harm this girl. I suggest talking to an elder honestly and raise any concerns, anything you've seen our heard. It's not right if your elders already know stuff and they stay quiet. Make sure they don't turn a blind eye to this situation.
Re: Men and fantasies – yuck!
I can’t believe you actually have the nerve to say this about a situation like the one DHTN mentioned. A very very good close friend of mine was raped by her own uncle (father’s brother) when she was around 11 or 12. Not once, but a few times. She was too afraid to tell her parents at first, but then she told them. I’m not sure what actually came out of it, but she’s been ‘wounded’ for life.
You may be right about certain situations with your comments above, but unless you’ve gone through something like this yourself (God forbid) or know someone who has…you should be careful before forming such an opinion. Just my two cents.
Re: Men and fantasies -- yuck!
LOL......... welcome DH.
Re: Men and fantasies – yuck!
ok some ppl thora emotional ho rahi hain…dmaghi was not talking abt incest, like some of the later posts are saying here…she was talking abt a lil faciantion btw chacha/mamoon/phuppa and bhatiji/bhanji getting a lil out of hand.
in my opinion the girl is too childish to know whats going on, or if she does, then it could easily be like muslim-queen says…its the parents we need to blame…obviously the wife of the huzoor cant go and say to the girls parents kai bhaee aap apni bachi koa kuch aadaab sikhain baloghat mai mail jol kai…
Re: Men and fantasies -- yuck!
CB just a logical issue if you can't have a point of view on something you have not experienced then might as well shut down the way society and our world works. Everybody has a right to say and think what they want responsibly.
It is cornerstone of modern society. To state just because you haven't experienced it you have no right to comment is narrow-minded and frankly ignorant. You are implying that experience is the only way to form an opinion that is valid.
Secondly I see no conjective phrasing which links the present conversation and subject of the thread with what MQ has said. It was a generalized statement implying that women are equally as bad. This however is not a comment on the current situation, or that of your friends.
Re: Men and fantasies -- yuck!
CM, I do understand that. But it's also true that you can't know jack about what a person goes through unless you've been in the situation yourself, or know someone close enough who has.
If MQ has commented on this topic, I don't think I'm wrong if I've assumed that the comment is on the current situation. As I said before, I too believe that there are certain situations where women are equally to blame. However, I wouldn't conclude that in this situation. At least not unless the 'woman' is a mature adult.
Re: Men and fantasies -- yuck!
And like i stated to limit a persons freedom of speech on the simple notion that you assume they know nothing about the matter is narrow minded and ignorant.
Look at the way the thread is structured. From what i can read MQ was commenting in general and then DNHT or whatever stated what happened. It was stated after the fact. The comments should be seen in the context of the thread and what information was supplied at what point. Not in its entirety.
Re: Men and fantasies -- yuck!
A girl is abused by an 'uncle'. In response to that, she's deemed 'equally bad' because you think women are just as bad in today's society. I WILL have an issue with that opinion. If that makes me ignorant, so be it.
Re: Men and fantasies -- yuck!
Once again read context. Dimagh_HotaToNa editted her post at 1:27. MQ posted at 2:33. So I assume she did not read the original post. As there is an hour difference. She commented on that fact that women can be held responsible for her own actions in such a situation.
At 3:04 Dimagh_HotaToNa stated that she agreed with MQ that the girl had a part to play. But look at the context of the discussion. Until the post of Dimagh_HotaToNa at 3:04 nobody knew the details nor the situation of an abusive uncle.
It was all very general discussion - discussing fantasies.
If you fail to realise that the conversation changed from a general discussion to a very specific one where an individual is a creep (Edit i mean the uncle in this case, just to clarify) then you are indeed narrow minded or ignorant.
Context is what you are missing. MQ's post was a general comment on male fantasies and that women are sometimes the cause for that. It takes two to tango. The conversation then changed to that of abuse.
Re: Men and fantasies -- yuck!
And how, if I may ask, did you conclude that I labeled her as a creep because she has an opinon? I merely said, she should be careful before forming such an opinion. I clearly explained what I meant in my original post.
I see you as ignorant and judgemental in this case.
If I misunderstood her comment, and that's not what she had implied, I'm sure we are mature adults who can discuss it amongst ourselves.
Re: Men and fantasies -- yuck!
No no the guy - the uncle is the creep. I was not commenting on you two ladies nor your opinions of each other. I was stating that the male is a creep. Personally, believe he needs to be castrated.
I am completely and utterly judgemental.
Just to repeat myself. The discussion went from General with no details to a specific situation. The comments should be seen in light of that evolution and not stand alone.
Edit: For grammer and syntax.
Re: Men and fantasies -- yuck!
I don't know her enough to form an opinion of her. But that's besides the point.
DHTN, sorry for derailing your thread. No more. :o
Re: Men and fantasies – yuck!
I completely agree. :k: Not to mention in this case the man in question is her uncle. Regardless of how ‘Lolita’ like she behaved with him, he was the responsible adult and should therefore act like one.
Re: Men and fantasies -- yuck!
How can you say its not bordering on incest?
It is basically incest.
But honestly, if the girl is encouraging it, then both sides are at fault. And if both have already been talked to, then there is not much else you can do. They will only hurt themselves.
By the way, thru this all - what is the reaction of this uncle's wife? Does she even know?