There’s this friend of my husband who has invited all of his close friends and their families to dinner. He got divorced recently within a year of his marriage. We actually attended his wedding and it was a bit of a shock for us(for me specially). So I was wondering how should I react to him, should I condemn and say sorry or completely ignore the news?
PS: he’s always like a brother to me and his mom and sisters are quite close to me so he’s more than just a friend.
This is for the first time after his divorce that we’re seeing him.
I don't think it's for another person to judge someone about their life choices (good or bad) unless those choices prove that he or she is a bad person. And if he's a bad person, than I'd stay away from them altogether.
Expressing regret about the fact that his life didn't work out as he wished should be sufficient - but done on a one-on-one basis and not in a group setting.
I don't think it's for another person to judge someone about their life choices (good or bad) unless those choices prove that he or she is a bad person. And if he's a bad person, than I'd stay away from them altogether.
There's this friend of my husband who has invited all of his close friends and their families to dinner. He got divorced recently within a year of his marriage. We actually attended his wedding and it was a bit of a shock for us(for me specially). So I was wondering how should I react to him, should I condemn and say sorry or completely ignore the news?
PS: he's always like a brother to me and his mom and sisters are quite close to me so he's more than just a friend.
This is for the first time after his divorce that we're seeing him.
I added more to my original response - but I was surprised by your comment about condemning (him or the situation is unclear).
So I was wondering how should I react to him, should I condemn and say sorry or completely ignore the news?
no need to condemn or say sorry. In fact I would say something like 'I know it must be tough going through that, may allah make this decision better for the future of both of you'
When I got divorced...I gave myself a trip to Vegas and became even more social. Why you may ask? Not because I wanted people to find me a rishta...because I wanted to feel normal. Like I still fit in with the rest of society and people will not ignore me or treat me differently. I got some nasty comments sure, but for the most part I was pleasantly surprised. I think he is trying to get out of this funk he might be in because of his divorce. He may be trying to move past it and take a positive approach to things...so go and be normal.
If you're close to his family or him...dont ignore the fact that he got divorced and pretend it didnt happen. Say something...but dont say sorry. I wasnt sorry so anyone who said "Im sorry" was responded to with "dont be...Im not".
"How are you doing? You look like you're doing well!"
He is the same person you knew before he got married, isn't he? He's not a criminal or a murderer -- treat him like a friend who has gone through some difficulties and is continuing on with his life. If he feels "over it" enough to have a party, then you should be over it, too.
Hareem, I think you used the wrong word here..... condemn is getting everyone confused.... I think you meant something along the the line of console him, no?
so is that what ur worried about? .. lol .. i can see just how 'close' him n his family r 2 u ..
No actually his mom asked me to look for a rishta in past (that was before his marriage) so i was thinking may be that's the reason but I gues Reha solved the puzzle and now I assume it's just to get social and feel normal again.
Hareem, I think you used the wrong word here..... condemn is getting everyone confused.... I think you meant something along the the line of console him, no?
Yes, you'r right, I used the wrong word, I meant "condole"(taziyat).
