measure everything....


A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink and while he’s drinking, the monkey starts jumping all over the place. The monkey grabs some olives off the bar and eats them, then grabs some sliced limes and eats them,then jumps up on the pool table, grabs the cue ball, sticks it in his mouth and swallows it whole.The bartender screams at the guy, “Did you see what your monkey just did?” The guy says, “No, what?” “He just ate the cue ball off my pool table - whole!” says the bartender. “Yeah, that doesn’t surprise me,” replies the patron. “He eats everything in sight, the little twerp. I’ll pay for the cue ball and stuff.” He finishes his drink, pays his bill, and leaves.
Two weeks later he’s in the bar again, and he has his monkey with him. He orders a drink and the monkey starts running around the bar again.While the man is drinking, the monkey finds a maraschino cherry on the bar. He grabs it, sticks it up his butt, pulls it out, and eats it. The bartender is disgusted. “Did you see what your monkey did now?” “Now
what?” asks the patron. “Well, he stuck a maraschino cherry up his butt, then pulled it out and ate it!” says the barkeeper. “Yeah, that doesn’t surprise me,” replies the patron. “He still eats everything in sight, but ever since he ate that damn cue ball he measures everything first!”


Treat others the way you want to be treated!!

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it takes a minute to get a crush on someone..an hour to like someone..and a day to love someone-but it takes a lifetime to forget someone

lollllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll plzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz stop this


'Hate your enemy mildly; he may become your friend one day' - Hadith
'as for those who are slain in the cause of allah, he will not allow their work to perish ... he will admit them to the paradise he has made known to them' - Surah 47:7

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ROTFL..!!!

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That is soooooooooooooooo funny!

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and more…

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Good on ya monkey!

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Your future depends on your dreams…so go to sleep!

hahahahahaa! this was funny