MAYYYYJOR dilemma

Wow!! so true :)

@Thread Starter

First impressions are often the last impressions. If you disliked him so intensely, don't marry him, period. Although, I find your logic for disliking him quite childish. But then, Islam has given women the right to choose whom they want to marry. Don't worry, your mom will get around.

No individual has the right to pressurize you into marriage, even your Mum. She can advise you, but the last decision is yours. Don't make the mistake of falling for her emotional blackmail. You will only blame her anyway if you were to marry a freshie. As a mother she is concerned about you and has every right to be, but if she gets nasty that is her choice. You also have 2 choices. Either ignore it (without disrespecting her) or cave in and be miserable for the rest of your life.

God has given you the right to choose your husband, don't let well-meaning relatives usurp that right.

Re: MAYYYYJOR dilemma

You didn't like him. Don't marry him. Try talking with your mum. She needs to understand that he's not the only guy in the world. There are plenty of other people out there. Also remember that if you don't like someone, you can't force yourself to like them in that way. It just doesn't happen. If I don't like someone the first time I see them I tell my mum straight what I really think of the person. Let her give you the silent treatment. She'll get over it. You can't marry someone if there's no attraction there.

P.S. A message to the overly sensitive people: This is MY opinion so please spare your time and my time in arguing over my views. Thanks!

Im a guy and when I refused my mum's desired rishta for me, we had a big fight eventually leading me to get kicked out. Still she still loves me, and I love her. The anger disappears over time.

Talk to your mum, but understand she feels let down and probably had alot of hopes for that guy.

Re: MAYYYYJOR dilemma

I dont think you should feel pressurised into saying yes...this is baout your life..and if you dont feel that attraction/connection then there is no point going any further...and also when parents are looking for rishtay there will be times where you will say no that is the whole point of the process...finding someone tht you can spend the rest of your life with and are happy with.i think you need to explain this to your mum...there is no point being pressured and the marriage not working out...its better to wait and then for it to work out..

Re: MAYYYYJOR dilemma

I havent read any of the replies here but here is my opinion. I didn't find my hubby attractive the first time I met him. I flat out said no to my parents and they kept pressuring me and pressuring me. You need to give him a chance and talk to him at least. My hubby turned out to be the coolest guy and not a fob at all! We completely hit it off and soon enough I was head over heels for him. A persons personality can make them attractive to you. I would say give him a chance at least and if you still dont like him after talking to him then kindly explain this to your mom. She will get over it soon. Also, do istikhara!

Re: MAYYYYJOR dilemma

I was thinking about istikhara but aint it a bit soon for that. atleast my mums talking to me now which is good. i dont really care about anything else... but if it does kick off again then i'll tell her how i feel and what she should be going for.. i doubt it if my type exists but its worth a try.