Mirch Sanjeeda's aunt has brought her nephew's (husband's sides) rishta for her...Guy lives in pak...She lives in Uk...They have never met...She hardly talks to her own cousins... Her aunty loves the guy and treats him like her own kid...Her parents like him as well.....He is very close to her aunt so he knows about much more about sanjeeda than she knows about him...He is coming over to Uk on a student visa and will stay in her house for 2 days...her parents will agree to the rishta after they both said yes...She is asking about what questions she should ask the guy when she meets him to find out about what he is like as a person as she hardly knows him and these 2 days may be her only chance to get to know him before her parents ask for her opinion on the matter.
Oh yeah and guy had this other rishta as well which he rejected saying he wants to find out about what sanjeeda's family says. She is saying how can he say no to a potential rishta for her as he doesnt even know her.
R U SERIOUS???
I mean HOW DOES IT WORK?
i would have understand if he was JUST a cousin or a random guy BUT HE IS UR FIANCE
Hatts off yaaaar
Best wishes for your future
Allah ap dono ko salamat rakhain Ameen
1. Would he be okay with a woman working after marriage?
2. Is he a social person or prefers reading a good book over outings?
3. What does he do when he gets angry at something.
etc etc.
Ask questions that matter to you most. What do you want your future husband to be like? What interests you and what would YOU find acceptable and unacceptable traits in a husband. Think about those and try to gear your questions towards those.
I agree with MIAinVA
Yeh sawal to zaror poochna
And agar ap uk mai rehna chati ho shadi k bad to PLEASE abi say clear ker daina yeh baat
Un say pooch laina k woh uk mai settle hona chatay hy ya nahe
Werna bad mai BAHOT beri problem create ho jay ge :)
Good Luck :)
Ameen to your Duas… and Thanks lol It just works in a way…I dont think my parents will be comfortable in me talking to him before we get married I have never tried neither has he!!! I think its alright in a way as I have known him all my life not properly known him but I know how he is as a person and how he deals with certain situation but THEN again he may be totally different person after the marriage I dont know…Lol it is hard to explain to people why we dont communicate but it is just the way it is…and I do know it does not work for everyone like in your case you have never met the guy so at least when he is here you will get the chance to see him!!!
Our parents have never said you guys CANT talk…we just DONT!!! We do see each other on family occassions and stuff but we dont even say Hello’s anymore just give blank stares to each other Lol
Hope it works out for you…and as everyone has said be yourself…dont put too much pressure on yourself…chances are guy already likes you as he has already said no to someone because of you? But you should not just say yes for family’s sake!!! First and foremost when you see the guy ask yourself Can you see yourself growing old with him as in do you fancy him? I am not saying looks are the most important thing they are not but you need to be able to have an attraction for your spouse because InshAllah you will be spending rest of your life with him!
Where was the other rishta from? was the girl in Pakistan? He's on a student visa................you need to work out his intentions in marrying some one from the Uk
The gal also lives in pak. She is a daughter of his dad’s best frnd. Mujay nahi pata k unho nay yeh rishta kio reject kia.
Aur **ajuba **jo baat ap nay ki hy yehi sawal meray zehun mai b ghoom raha tha. I wanna settle in uk after marriage, so i want a guy who is willing to stay in uk. BUT i DON’T wanna marry with someone who is willing to marry me for the sake of UK, that would be soooo mean.
Aik rishta reject kerna koi beri baat nahe hoti BUT aik rishtay ko recject ker k dosray rishtay ki baat kerna aur jis say baat ho rahi hy ussay kabhi milay b nahe, daikha b nahe (shayad meri pic daikhe ho but mainay to unki pic b nahe daikhi). I mean aisa koi kaisay ker sakta hy. Its weired isn’t it?
Mai janna chati ho k unho nay aisa kio kia. Is it because he likes me ya phir koi aur baat hy Likin mai kaisay pata kero yeh? Mujay kaya pata k woh muj say sach bol rahay hy ya jhoot?
Mirch Sanjeeda's aunt has brought her nephew's (husband's sides) rishta for her...Guy lives in pak...She lives in Uk...They have never met...She hardly talks to her own cousins... Her aunty loves the guy and treats him like her own kid...Her parents like him as well.....He is very close to her aunt so he knows about much more about sanjeeda than she knows about him...He is coming over to Uk on a student visa and will stay in her house for 2 days...her parents will agree to the rishta after they both said yes...She is asking about what questions she should ask the guy when she meets him to find out about what he is like as a person as she hardly knows him and these 2 days may be her only chance to get to know him before her parents ask for her opinion on the matter.
Oh yeah and guy had this other rishta as well which he rejected saying he wants to find out about what sanjeeda's family says. She is saying how can he say no to a potential rishta for her as he doesnt even know her.
Hope it helps.
Glampsy, Thanks a million for translating it all out for me.
Sanjeeda, Marriages in desi community are very complicated matter. We are not allowed courtships , because it is against our religion. So all we can bank on is the feedback from others . No amount of direct questions will help you decide because if the guy is into. moving to UK at all cost and by all means he will put his best foot forward.
Also what can you find out about the habits and interpersonal skills in two day , nothing.
So if you like your aunt and you think she will lookout for you best interest and you have nothing against arranged marriages then do your best and leave the rest to Allah(SWT).
It is not always wrong if some guy wants to settle in UK and wants to marry a girl who can help him in this process. Many many desi boys and girls have done that and they are living happily ever after.
I'm sorry but it took ages to read your Roman Urdu :( Anyways, i'm a bit sceptical on this one. He hasn't seen you and rejected a rishta. I'm not being horrible but just blunt, maybe he's marrying you so he could live here? Has he seen pictures of you? Don't have your heart set on him. Look about and see what other options there are.
Glampsy, Thanks a million for translating it all out for me.
Sanjeeda, Marriages in desi community are very complicated matter. We are not allowed courtships , because it is against our religion. So all we can bank on is the feedback from others . No amount of direct questions will help you decide because if the guy is into. moving to UK at all cost and by all means he will put his best foot forward.
Also what can you find out about the habits and interpersonal skills in two day , nothing.
So if you like your aunt and you think she will lookout for you best interest and you have nothing against arranged marriages then do your best and leave the rest to Allah(SWT).
It is not always wrong if some guy wants to settle in UK and wants to marry a girl who can help him in this process. Many many desi boys and girls have done that and they are living happily ever after.
I'm sorry but it took ages to read your Roman Urdu :( Anyways, i'm a bit sceptical on this one. He hasn't seen you and rejected a rishta. I'm not being horrible but just blunt, maybe he's marrying you so he could live here? Has he seen pictures of you? Don't have your heart set on him. Look about and see what other options there are.
I have the same question in my mind :(
WHY did he do this???????
I am not sure, my aunty might have showed him my pix. No i am not going to set my heart on anyone, its wayyyyyyyyy too early yaaar and i dun even know him properly.
