[quote]
Originally posted by belle:
Salaam
I may be perceiving this in the wrong light but perhaps this is why people say that marriages are made in the heavens:
Among His signs is [the fact] that He has created spouses for you among yourselves so that you may dwell in tranquility with them, and He has planted love and mercy between you; in that are ** signs for people who reflect. Qur'an [30 : 21]**
He has planted affection and mercy between you. Qur'an [30: 12]
I apologize if this irrelevant to what is being addressed.
Allah Hafiz
[/quote]
Wa Alaikum salaam wa Rahmathullahi wa Barakaathuhu
Jazak Allahu khair Belle, for repeating the Qur’anic ayat 30:21 already quoted above, which surely tells us that it is a sign for those who can reflect.
Was salaam
Ibrahim
[This message has been edited by Ibrahim (edited March 16, 2002).]
In marriage, prefer: the person before money; virtue before beauty and mind before body.
Why prefer? when the person you are going to get married is already chosen for you?
With reference to the verse that belle mentioned, if you get into thafsir of that, you will come to know that it means pairs ie male and female, it doesn't mean that your specific marriage partner has been chosen, there is nothing as such mentioned in the Quran or Hadith, atleast not to my knowledge. This is why I have been asking brother Ibrahim to prove that from the Hadith and Quran, but he seems to point out other things such as life time and Rizq, I have only asked him to prove his claim in clear words.
Brother Ibrahim, the reason I want you to prove this is because, if your statement is correct, then every one shall excuse him/her self by saying that he/she is not responsible for his/her spouse since it was already pre-destined, thus relieving themselves of all the responsibility.
It is not so, you are instructed on whom you should marry and whom you shouldn't, in clear words, in The Quran and Hadith.
Whereas your claim is not clearly described, but instead its an assumption. Its not mentioned that who your husband will be or anything like it.
Extra care should be taken while dealing with matters of Religion, this is not a joke, let's act responsibly, we are not here to confuse the already confused.
Tell me brother Ibrahim, how do you justify your claim that the girl's rizq will only be provided by her husband? Look around, and be honest to yourself, do you believe that it is only through a husband that a woman gets her rizq?
Read the first post, and then look at the argument we are having.
[quote]
Originally posted by Different:
Why prefer? when the person you are going to get married is already chosen for you?
[/quote]
Ibrahim says; Salaams to all,
My dear Brother, you seem to have a desire to argue and that is your desire not mine.
Your problem to me seems as though you cannot understand simple things, whilst pondering over matters that had not been revealed to mankind.
Anyway, IF you Agree Allah (swt) knows best, which I am sure you do as a Muslim. Then you will have no problem understanding ** why Allah (swt) needed to create us, let us live on this planet and give us guidance again and again, and provide us with a conscience even, when He can have just sent us to hell or heaven without all the tests and trails based on His absolute knowledge, will and power.**
I believe I have answered your question, and to understand me you may need to experience the conditions that I may have experienced.
You also seem to be reading into my statements, what you have chosen to do and my statements are specific , addressing what I had understood from your queries.
Thus If you fail to understand me, try patience, prayer and perseverance and seek help from Allah (swt) not from me.
Was salaam
Ibrahim
16: 125 Invite (all) to the way of thy Lord with wisdom and beautiful preaching; and argue with them in ways that are best and most gracious: for thy Lord knoweth best who have strayed from His Path and who receive guidance.
Brother Ibrahim, I can't ignore and keep quiet when I see something that is harming innocent people and that too in the name of Islam.
I do not like to argue, but when arguing is for sorting out issues, then I do not think that it is wise to ignore and do nothing about it.
When you say that "Marriages are made in Heaven" your statement is justifying all those marriages that are considered un-lawful according to Islam.
How?
People will marry whomsoever they want to by themselves and say that "Marriages are made in Heaven"
Parents will force their children to marry against their wishes and then claim "Marriages are made in Heaven"
So you see, this statement of yours is creating a big mess, many people take advantage of statement's like these and justify their un-lawful acts and get away with things under the protection of "Islam".
Because majority of the people will make this statement an excuse and will ignore the other factors that are directly related.
Don't mis-understand me. Why are you thinking that I just want to argue with you? If I have an argument and I am dis-agreeing with you then, prove what you claim in the light of Quran and Sunnah.
There are so many married women who earn for themselves, infact their husbands are dependent on them, so how can you justify by saying that since Allah has written the livelihood of a girl whilst she is still in the womb, that she has to have a husband?
Ibrahim says: Salaams to all.
My dear brother, I believed I made myself clear earlier , the only thing I wish to add is what Allah (swt) had revealed to me and you already.
Let us read.
30: 54 ** It is Allah Who created you in a state of (helpless) weakness then gave (you) strength after weakness then after strength give (you) weakness and a hoary head: He creates as He wills and it is He Who has all knowledge and power. **
55 On the Day that the Hour (of reckoning) will be established the transgressors will swear that they tarried not but an hour: ** thus were they used to being deluded! **
56 ** But those endued with knowledge and faith will say: "Indeed ye did tarry within Allah's Decree to the Day of Resurrection ** and this is the Day of Resurrection: but ye ye were not aware!
After which let us read……………..
57: 22 ** No misfortune can happen on earth or in your souls but is recorded in a decree before We bring it into existence: that is truly easy for Allah: **
23 ** In order that ye may not despair over matters that pass you by nor exult over favors bestowed upon you. For Allah loveth not any vainglorious boaster **
I repeat …………….
Brother, You also seem to be reading into my statements, what you have chosen to read into them, whereas my statements are specific , addressing what I had understood from your queries.
Thus If you fail to understand me, try patience, prayer and perseverance and seek help from Allah (swt) not from me.
Was salaam
Ibrahim
** We the company of Prophets have the hardest trials, then after us come the believers, then the others like them .** (sayings of the Prophet [pbuh]) .
[quote]
Originally posted by Ibrahim:
** Ibrahim says; Salaams to all,
My dear Brother, you seem to have a desire to argue and that is your desire not mine.
Your problem to me seems as though you cannot understand simple things, whilst pondering over matters that had not been revealed to mankind.
**
[/quote]
Shouldn't I be saying this?
Its revealed to mankind that "Choose your spouses" and its not revealed to mankind that "Marriages are made in Heaven".
How many Hadith and how many verses clearly state that you have to choose your marriage partner based on a certain criteria, but what is not revealed is that "your marriage partner is already chosen for you so whoever you get married to should be considered chosen for you".
Brother Ibrahim, you have to find out the difference between Destiny and Action. Please do not get confused between the two. Try to find out what comes into the Destiny Category and what comes into the Action Category.
This statement on which we have a difference has already messed up many lives. Don't use this statement to excuse yourself & others of any responsibility on the importance of choosing the right spouse. It is also a test and trial not destiny.
Don't blame destiny if you are a loser after chosing a spouse based on anything but Character/Deen. Refer to the Hadith I posted in my earlier posts.
Salam