re: Love or Patience [GS Debate Group - 1] - Won By "Innocent Soul"
Unrelated question, Appa in our language is father. What is Appa in this context - just curious. I liked the Shazia Appa reference - so had to ask
apa is elder sister n i love to be called apa...it is also fine when some one even bigger than me but call me this, so every one is welcome to call me apa :)
re: Love or Patience [GS Debate Group - 1] - Won By "Innocent Soul"
both of you are doing good job...keep up the gud work guys n thanx chachu for solving the problem:)
now definitely southie 'll ask that what is chachu???chachu is younger brother of father :)
re: Love or Patience [GS Debate Group - 1] - Won By “Innocent Soul”
Well done Southie…:k: now this debate seems more fun…
So, Here is response to your post…
Love, admittedly, is very important thing but i m emphasizing more on the importance of patience because in my opinion love is a a great force but only in private life while in public affairs its not successful. And if the public/ external (not related to family) life is disturbed how can one manage to be kind and loving to his family. I got to know a few people personally whom when got scolded/ insulted or fired from work they also become too much harsh to their loved ones(i.e. family members). One example i want to quote here is real and i know the person personally…my neighbor’s husband got fired from job due to some problems and he became so much irritated that he started abusing his wife not only verbally but also physically, though their life was moving very pleasantly before his sack. The thing he needed at that time was patience.
Love (in the sense we are discussing here) means a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person, a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection. And we can have all these feelings for someone who is belonging to us or we want him/her to be a part of our life in some sense. But how can one feel same feelings for some xyz whom we don’t know or have nothing to do with (anyone out of our friends/family circle). I can feel affection for my neighbor’s child but if he/she harms my younger sis or bro, it will become difficult for me to feel same for THAT child.
The point that bad people also sometimes possesses the quality of patience and wait for the time to come and take revenge or do harm to us…but what they want to take revenge or do harm to us for? Have we done something wrong to them or its their nature? As its very truly said Love begets love, the same is the matter with anger or hatred. If we instead of being huffy and hasty and saying or doing things that can make others angry, try to stay calm and handle the situation in a way that no grudges remain in other’s heart, it can save the both parties from future mis-happenings.
And if we haven’t done something wrong with someone in past and still they are trying to harm us. This is the situation where really our temperament can be judged. And its the situation where we need to be calm. But being calm or letting things go doesn’t mean giving up your rights or giving in.
It means trying to help yourself from those actions that can lead to a disaster.
re: Love or Patience [GS Debate Group - 1] - Won By “Innocent Soul”
Southie Uncle 
re: Love or Patience [GS Debate Group - 1] - Won By “Innocent Soul”
how lovely the world would become if it happens so
re: Love or Patience [GS Debate Group - 1] - Won By “Innocent Soul”
Innocent Smile! In rules, it is clearly stated participants are not allowed to quote opponent’s comments for any reason. Please follow the rule 
I, therefore revoke your one ‘like’
re: Love or Patience [GS Debate Group - 1] - Won By “Innocent Soul”
Lethal bhai thats a bit harsh but rules are rules.
Mind you the debate is first class
re: Love or Patience [GS Debate Group - 1] - Won By “Innocent Soul”
Kyaa muhthod jawaab diya, Wah, Wah, Wah!
re: Love or Patience [GS Debate Group - 1] - Won By "Innocent Soul"
Aaliya, Shazia 'Apa', moderator je, Faris, Waleed, Innocent - thanks for your encouragements :)
re: Love or Patience [GS Debate Group - 1] - Won By “Innocent Soul”
Agree Faris Bhai! and she quoted for appreciate it. Although i wrote in rule if u wanna appreciate then you can ‘likes’ opponents comments. This is b’coz now they appreciate but what if they disagree??? we don’t want this thread with full of fight with each others. we need it peaceful, clean and according to the subject.
Southie 
re: Love or Patience [GS Debate Group - 1] - Won By "Innocent Soul"
Clearly there are multiple instances of spousal abuse, child verbal/physical abuse. An in some cases killings also. I do not have an answer as to how love in those cases lead to such tragedies. Some would argue that those who abuse do not practise true love. But I choose not to be so harsh. In a planet with ~ 5 billion people, it is virtually impossible to avoid these incidents.
It is also mostly true that one cannot love another person's child as much as our own. However, just because one cannot achieve an ideal, it does not mean one should not strive for it. Those who never met failure have not achieved true success. We may trip several times, but the key is get back up, dust off our fannies, and move forward.
Most importantly, it is mostly true that for most 'evil' actions, there are root causes behind them. Some one has been wronged, or they perceive themselves to be wronged, or a little bit of both. But the question of hurting someone (and thus provoking them to strike back) almost does not arise with love in the picture.
We need love to survive. Love for others will make us conserve water, use only what we need. Rather than think in terms of I can afford to use gallaons and gallons of water, we will ask ourselves, how about that country across the border, that poor person in a hut. Why not save some for them. Water shortage will be the next reason for warfare. Love your neighbor and your neighbor's neighbor. Then there wil be sufficient resources for everyone. War avoided.
re: Love or Patience [GS Debate Group - 1] - Won By “Innocent Soul”
Interesting :k:
re: Love or Patience [GS Debate Group - 1] - Won By “Innocent Soul”
Good point and I agree with you… Also by quoting the other player it also makes it awkward for us to follow who said what… 
Like I said rules are there for a reason.
So Innocent Smile and Southie, friends I hate to say it but could you please stop quoting each other becuase it’s like watching Wimbledon tennis.
That said this debate is superb!
re: Love or Patience [GS Debate Group - 1] - Won By “Innocent Soul”
Sholly…:o i didn’t quote his comments for the debate purpose …but still sholly for breaking rule …
re: Love or Patience [GS Debate Group - 1] - Won By "Innocent Soul"
I must say the debate is getting more and more interesting now :).
Coming to the point....love is extremely essential in our lives....but how can we love someone if we can't tolerate them. True love is something in which you are ready to accept others view points and ready to appreciate them. And to appreciate other's POV the first step is to listen them and to listen to others is something that is closely related to patience and tolerance. sometimes we don't listen others advise because it seems humiliation or interference in our lives but in actual that is something in favour of us. To get the clear idea of other's intention the mean thing needed is Communication and to communicate properly does't only mean delivering your POV but listening others too. And unfortunately most of us are not ready to listen others. Elders think they are doing in the best of their children so they don't need to listen them, Children think their elders are imposing their decisions only because of their elderliness and an atmosphere of stress and mistrust start taking place. Love is there (as no parents want wrong for their child or no child can think that the parents are enemy) but they are not communicating their desires, wishes, fears and concerns. The only think that can save the Love that has gone in background is patience and letting others speak their inner self out. In short To live a happy life, love is necessary and to express that love and make others understand that how much we love them, two way communication is very vital and for That two way communication patience is needed.
re: Love or Patience [GS Debate Group - 1] - Won By “Innocent Soul”
Wow absolutely loving it this debate forum idea was a spark of genius thanks to LKK and just seeing the quality of both arguments is indeed one of the most inspirational threads on GS I wonder how we can get more people over here. 
Well done to both Innocent Smile and Southie it’s going to be hard to judge between the two both have made superb points. 
re: Love or Patience [GS Debate Group - 1] - Won By “Innocent Soul”
Faris Bhai!
The same question was in my mind how to judge/slect one between these two gems. Both enlightened very well and their views are supereb. In fact I learned a lot and came to know there was lot of thing which I hav forgetten in my real life and those missing need to be filled by love and patience.
re: Love or Patience [GS Debate Group - 1] - Won By "Innocent Soul"
Beautiful reasoning Innocent.
I agree with you that in order to express love, 2-way communication is necessary. Hence patience is a necessary for existence and sustaining of true love. What comes first - chicken or egg appears to be the question.
I discussed earlier about how one can be patient and be plotting evil. The other side of the coin is when a country or a person is patient and continues to take figurative body blows from an aggressor. If that patience is infinite, the person continues to get wronged. If the patience is finite, the person eventually blows up, leading to mother of all wars.
Patience in the face of an evil opponent can be a ticking time bomb. But substitute that with love, and probably the evil opponent can be won over.
As a mother, one needs to ask oneself - if I were to be given a Sophie's choice, which would I rather give my child - show him/her patience or shower the child with love.
re: Love or Patience [GS Debate Group - 1] - Won By “Innocent Soul”
I am “sholly” too
re: Love or Patience [GS Debate Group - 1] - Won By “Innocent Soul”
Both carry on please and good luck :k: