love marriage

[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by patakha_1: *
i am totally confused now :S:S:S
well in tht case we r the ones to choose our life partners.
U tell me one thing what is a solution of a gal/boy who is not capable of gping against her mom who is a conservative person.and the gal alwayz obeys her mom.How will she married to the person she likes
[/QUOTE]

talk talk talk, and convince your / his mom, there is nothing wrong in marring a person of your choice. This is your given right. Sometimes parents are right and sometimes are confused themselves, so you guys need to talk about these matters and please take your time, dont rush into decisions that will be for lifetime.

[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by patakha_1: *

Do you have any proof of any AYAT that proves what u r saying.What if u choose a partner but ur parents doesnt like.Then!!! and u r married to the person whom ur parents like.This is why it is said that JORIAN BUNTI HAI UPER AASMANO PE
[/QUOTE]

What are you trying to say?

Why is it said that JORIAN BUNTI HAI UPER AASMANO PE ?

please get me a proof of what you are saying about pre-destined marriage partner and how does it fit into Islam... I have posted verses from Quran and Sahih Hadith in previous threads on this forum, where it is clearly mentioned that you have to choose your life partner...!

[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Different: *
please get me a proof of what you are saying about pre-destined marriage partner and how does it fit into Islam... I have posted verses from Quran and Sahih Hadith in previous threads on this forum, where it is clearly mentioned that you have to choose your life partner...!
[/QUOTE]

I also agree that a marriage partner has to be chosen, and that marriages are not made in "heaven". Different, can you provide those Quaranic verses and Hadith verses which relate to this?

i agree that u choose ur life partner.What if u cant break ur mother's heart n tell ur choice,,as ur mom is conservative n u r living in a joint family system where all decisions r made collectively!!!
Is there any wazeefa.Coz intentions are not to hurt anyone especially ur mom,,coz she wont do anything to the gal but to herself.!!!!!!
Is there any way out....
i know this is a stupid question!!But a coz of mine is going thru all this..N we r helpless at the moment

well if u want a precise answer then "NO love marriages are not allowed"
becoz b4 marriage a guy and girl are not suppose 2 know each other and meet.
but as far it goes for ur like or dislike then islam gives u right to accept or reject some1 as ur soulmate.
Nikah can't be done if the girl don't agrees. So girl has a choice.
but knowing one b4 marriages is not allowed and so is haram.
well on the other hand if ur parents porpose a rishta to u and u fell in love and fascinate about that guy i.e says yes 2 rishta willfully; by not knowing about ur sopouse then yeah in that case it wud be a love marriage and wud be totally in limits of islam. so yeah in that case love marriage is allowed.

[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by superglue: *

on the other hand if ur parents porpose a rishta to u and u fell in love and fascinate about that guy i.e says yes 2 rishta willfully; by not knowing about ur sopouse then yeah in that case it wud be a love marriage and wud be totally in limits of islam. so yeah in that case love marriage is allowed.

[/QUOTE]

How can you fall in love without knowing anything about your spouse?

[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Fret Wizard: *

I also agree that a marriage partner has to be chosen, and that marriages are not made in "heaven". Different, can you provide those Quaranic verses and Hadith verses which relate to this?
[/QUOTE]

Narrated by Abu Huraira:

The Prophet SAW said, "A woman is married for four things, i.e., her wealth, her family status, her beauty and her religion. So you should marry the religious woman (otherwise) you will be a losers.

When someone with whose religion and character you are satisfied asks for your daughter in marriage, accede to his request. If you do not do so there will be corruption and great evil on the earth.
(Tirmidhi). (The Lawful and Prohibited in Islam (arb: Al Halal Wal Haram Fil Islam) by. Yusuf Qaradawi).

Three matters should not be delayed: salat when its time comes, burial when the funeral has arrived, and the marriage of a single woman when a man of equal status has proposed.
(Tirmidhi). (The Lawful and Prohibited in Islam (arb: Al Halal Wal Haram Fil Islam) by. Yusuf Qaradawi).

The Messenger (sas) said: "Do not marry the virgin until her permission has been sought." And this is general - no one is exempted from it, not (even) her guardians. It is reported in Saheeh Muslim: "The virgin, her father is to seek her consent..."

In the name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.

002.221 YUSUFALI: Do not marry unbelieving women (idolaters), until they believe: A slave woman who believes is better than an unbelieving woman, even though she allures you. Nor marry (your girls) to unbelievers until they believe: A man slave who believes is better than an unbeliever, even though he allures you. Unbelievers do (but) beckon you to the Fire. But Allah beckons by His Grace to the Garden (of bliss) and forgiveness, and makes His Signs clear to mankind: That they may celebrate His praise.

004.025
YUSUFALI: If any of you have not the means wherewith to wed free believing women, they may wed believing girls from among those whom your right hands possess: And Allah hath full knowledge about your faith. Ye are one from another: Wed them with the leave of their owners, and give them their dowers, according to what is reasonable: They should be chaste, not lustful, nor taking paramours: when they are taken in wedlock, if they fall into shame, their punishment is half that for free women. This (permission) is for those among you who fear sin; but it is better for you that ye practise self-restraint. And Allah is Oft-forgiving, Most Merciful.

005.005
YUSUFALI: This day are (all) things good and pure made lawful unto you. The food of the People of the Book is lawful unto you and yours is lawful unto them. (Lawful unto you in marriage) are (not only) chaste women who are believers, but chaste women among the People of the Book, revealed before your time,- when ye give them their due dowers, and desire chastity, not lewdness, nor secret intrigues if any one rejects faith, fruitless is his work, and in the Hereafter he will be in the ranks of those who have lost (all spiritual good).

033.049
YUSUFALI: O ye who believe! **When ye marry believing women, and then divorce them before ye have touched them, **no period of 'Iddat have ye to count in respect of them: so give them a present. And set them free in a handsome manner.

033.052
YUSUFALI: **It is not lawful for thee (to marry more) women after this, **nor to change them for (other) wives, even though their beauty attract thee, except any thy right hand should possess (as handmaidens): and Allah doth watch over all things.

060.010
YUSUFALI: O ye who believe! When there come to you believing women refugees, examine (and test) them: Allah knows best as to their Faith: if ye ascertain that they are Believers, then send them not back to the Unbelievers. They are not lawful (wives) for the Unbelievers, nor are the (Unbelievers) lawful (husbands) for them. But pay the Unbelievers what they have spent (on their dower), and there will be no blame on you if ye marry them on payment of their dower to them. But hold not to the guardianship of unbelieving women: ask for what ye have spent on their dowers, and let the (Unbelievers) ask for what they have spent (on the dowers of women who come over to you). Such is the command of Allah: He judges (with justice) between you. And Allah is Full of Knowledge and Wisdom.

[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by patakha_1: *
i agree that u choose ur life partner.What if u cant break ur mother's heart n tell ur choice,,as ur mom is conservative n u r living in a joint family system where all decisions r made collectively!!!
Is there any wazeefa.Coz intentions are not to hurt anyone especially ur mom,,coz she wont do anything to the gal but to herself.!!!!!!
Is there any way out....
i know this is a stupid question!!But a coz of mine is going thru all this..N we r helpless at the moment
[/QUOTE]

Either you please Allah or you please certain family members, the choice is yours. In the case of marriage, the lives of the new couple gets affected the most. And Allah swt is the All Knower and Wise.

If your cousin is not happy with the marriage and is being forced into the marriage in order to please her parents, then you should help your cousin by talking to her parents, instead of lying to your cousin by telling her that according to Islam "marriages are made in heaven".

Speaking the truth - Love is unfortunately forbidden from our sub-continent.

There are so many classes, religions, castes etc.....to divide people, I wonder if our people ever realise what is love.

If any one is in love, all types of threats are brought out to break them. Threats from family, friends relatives from God and even after death. I doubt even if God himself comes and tells us that love is acceptable among different castes, groups - our people will not listen to him. Our mindset is not yet grown.

There is always a difference in marrying someone you love and loving someone you marry. It is exactly similar to loving a dress and then getting it and getting a dress and loving it.

If you are not mentally strong enough - just forget love and marry your parents choice and remember there is nothing called love.

[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Fret Wizard: *

How can you fall in love without knowing anything about your spouse?
[/QUOTE]

Exactly my point fret.
u cna't fall in love without knowing a person
and u can't know a peson before u get wed to him/her.
so in other words love marriages are not allowed.

[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Victory: *
Speaking the truth - Love is unfortunately forbidden from our sub-continent.

There are so many classes, religions, castes etc.....to divide people, I wonder if our people ever realise what is love.

If any one is in love, all types of threats are brought out to break them. Threats from family, friends relatives from God and even after death. I doubt even if God himself comes and tells us that love is acceptable among different castes, groups - our people will not listen to him. Our mindset is not yet grown.

There is always a difference in marrying someone you love and loving someone you marry. It is exactly similar to loving a dress and then getting it and getting a dress and loving it.

If you are not mentally strong enough - just forget love and marry your parents choice and remember there is nothing called love.
[/QUOTE]

come on victory.
love shove its all crap.
they only kind of love which there is divine love.
loving ur creator.
thatrs about it.
as far it goes for ur own kind. then either their is respect involved . some intimacy involved, relation involved or lust is involved.
aite this question always bugs me.
think about it. why do one has 2 fall in love with some1 of opposite gender who is damn fyne and gud lookin.
well everybody got their own prespective.
but honestly only kind of love is human's wid Allah.
rest is all fake.

[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by superglue: *

Exactly my point fret.
u cna't fall in love without knowing a person
and u can't know a peson before u get wed to him/her.
so in other words love marriages are not allowed.
[/QUOTE]

According to a hadeeth narrated by Ibn Maajah (1847), “There is nothing better for two who love one another than marriage.” (This hadeeth was classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh Sunan Ibn Maajah).

[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by superglue: *

come on victory.
love shove its all crap.
they only kind of love which there is divine love.
loving ur creator.
thatrs about it.
as far it goes for ur own kind. then either their is respect involved . some intimacy involved, relation involved or lust is involved.
aite this question always bugs me.
think about it. why do one has 2 fall in love with some1 of opposite gender who is damn fyne and gud lookin.
well everybody got their own prespective.
but honestly only kind of love is human's wid Allah.
rest is all fake.
[/QUOTE]

Narrated Abu Uthman:
Allah's Apostle sent 'Amr bin Al As as the commander of the troops of Dhat-us-Salasil. 'Amr bin Al-'As said, "(On my return) I came to the Prophet and said, 'Which people do you love most?' He replied, 'Aisha.' I said, 'From amongst the men?' He replied, 'Her father (Abu Bakr)'. I said, 'Whom (do you love) next?' He replied, "Umar.' Then he counted the names of many men, and I became silent for fear that he might regard me as the last of them."

Title: What is the ruling on a father preventing his daughter from marrying who she wants?

Question:
**
Some fathers prevent their daughters from marrying someone who is compatible with them. What is the ruling on this? What is the daughters’ position?**

Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

This question was put to Shaykh Muhammad ibn ‘Uthaymeen (may Allaah have mercy on him), who said:

**This is a serious issue and a major problem. Some men – we seek refuge with Allaah – betray Allaah and betray their trust, and cause problems for their daughters. The guardian is obliged to do that which pleases Allaah and His Messenger. **Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): “And marry those among you who are single (i.e. a man who has no wife and the woman who has no husband)” – i.e., give your daughters in marriage – “and (also marry) the Saalihoon (pious, fit and capable ones) of your (male) slaves and maid-servants (female slaves).” [al-Noor 24:32]

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: **“If there comes to you one with whose character and religious commitment you are pleased, then marry (your female relative under your guardianship) to him, for if you do not do so, there will be tribulation and great mischief on earth.” **

**Some people – we seek refuge with Allaah – make their daughter a commodity to be sold to whoever they want, and they prevent her from marrying whoever they do not want. So they marry their daughter to a man whose character and religious commitment are not pleasing, because that suits their whims, and they prevent her from marrying one whose character and religious commitment are pleasing, because that does not suit them. **

Would that we could reach the level where a woman whose father prevents her from marrying one whose character and religious commitment are compatible could go to the qaadi and he would tell her father, “Marry her to him or I or a guardian other than you will do so,” because a girl has the right, if her father prevents her from marrying someone, (and she complains to the qaadi). This is a right given by sharee’ah. Would that we could reach this level, **but most girls are prevented by their shyness from doing this. **

Our advice to the father is still to fear Allaah and not to prevent her from marrying, because that may cause her to do something wrong and may lead to mischief. Let him ask himself, if he were prevented from marrying, what would happen to him?

His daughter whom he prevented from marrying will become his opponent on the Day of Resurrection:

“That Day shall a man flee from his brother,

And from his mother and his father,

And from his wife and his children.

Every man that Day will have enough to make him careless of others” ‘Abasa 80:34-37 – interpretation of the meaning]

Guardians, including fathers and brothers, must fear Allaah and not deny women their right to marry the one whose religious commitment and character is pleasing to them.

Yes, if a woman chooses someone whose religious commitment and character are not pleasing, then he (the father or guardian) may prevent her from marrying him. But if she chooses a righteous man whose religious commitment and character are good, then he prevents her from marrying because of his own whims and desires, this is haraam, by Allaah, and it is a sin and a betrayal. If any mischief results from this, the sin will be on him (the father).

http://63.175.194.25/index.php?ln=eng&ds=qa&lv=browse&QR=10196&dgn=3

very interesting ....... :)

[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by superglue: *

come on victory.
love shove its all crap.
they only kind of love which there is divine love.
loving ur creator.
thatrs about it.
as far it goes for ur own kind. then either their is respect involved . some intimacy involved, relation involved or lust is involved.
aite this question always bugs me.
think about it. why do one has 2 fall in love with some1 of opposite gender who is damn fyne and gud lookin.
well everybody got their own prespective.
but honestly only kind of love is human's wid Allah.
rest is all fake.
[/QUOTE]

Agree yaar. All love is crap. There is nothing called love in this world. Even love towards God is just a human conviction to defend his thoughts, ideologies and his beliefs. It is just a state of crap mind.

[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Different: *

Either you please Allah or you please certain family members, the choice is yours. In the case of marriage, the lives of the new couple gets affected the most. And Allah swt is the All Knower and Wise.

If your cousin is not happy with the marriage and is being forced into the marriage in order to please her parents, then you should help your cousin by talking to her parents, instead of lying to your cousin by telling her that according to Islam "marriages are made in heaven".
[/QUOTE]

what if she really cant break her mother's heart.Her mother have other tentions as well so she cant tell her mother!!!!

[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Different: *

Question:
**
**
ln=eng&ds=qa&lv=browse&QR=10196&dgn=3
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u really convinced me.that means LOVE MARRIAGES are allowed.N its not a sin if a gal chooses a man who is near to religion.>!>! thanx :)