Re: LOVE Marriage - relationship change afterwards???
Arranged marriages are a risk too.. cause what if you do not like your partners behavior, manners, etc. Usually just because you are now married - you ACCEPT the person - sometimes for the world to "see" that you are "happily" married. Although, given a chance you would run as fast as you can - now that you know the person!
Re: LOVE Marriage - relationship change afterwards???
^ yea, arranged marriage can be the biggest surprise of your life - no questions. But a love marriage definitely is not the solution.
Re: LOVE Marriage - relationship change afterwards???
Any relation will eventually change no matter what you do, even a mother and children relation. Ther is only one exception though, only one relation remains (if you have one) and that is with Allah.
Regards
All those who had a lurve marriage, those who had an emotional relationship with their partners before getting hitched, please tell if the emotional relationship between husband n wife changed afterwards, how long have u been married, how did it change, for better or for worse?
RupayHalwa - I have been married almost 10 years mA! Ofcourse things changed. The first two years were all about just the two of us.
As more responsibility (children, careers, finances, responsibility of aging parents) came the relationship changed. But it changed for the better. I think that's where love/care is tested the most.
In the beggining there are a lot of words "you can't live without the person" - "I love you", "I need you". After 10 years you literally will see those words come to life by actions. You depend on each other for everything. You run like a well oiled machine.
My parents have been married for 40 years. They had a love marriage. I think their marriage has came back full circle because the kids are all married. They have the house to themselves. They have more time for each other. They are actually back to square one.
Re: LOVE Marriage - relationship change afterwards???
i agree with the above poster that yes all relationships change
however back to the topic , yes the relationship does change somehow but with the change comes acceptance too . i dont think ppl dwell over it and u adjust to the new relationship u have with ur lover after marriage
which is not the same as being bf / gf or engaged or whatever but at the same time its not bad either
Re: LOVE Marriage - relationship change afterwards???
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Arranged marriages are a risk too.. cause what if you do not like your partners behavior, manners, etc. Usually just because you are now married - you ACCEPT the person - sometimes for the world to "see" that you are "happily" married. Although, given a chance you would run as fast as you can - now that you know the person!
Actually, that's the same case with love marriage as well. While your in your period of love/courting/dating etc, before marraige you don't always know the "true" person as well as you think, and it is only until you start living with the person, the reality kicks about their real manners/behavior etc. So many people go into a love marriage, only to get a surprise, and they too tend to eventually "accept" that behavior....
Putting you in their shoes, would you spill your guts all over the forums just because you are anonymous?
I know you haven't asked me but just to make a point I'll answer - no, I will not.
RupayHalwa - I have been married almost 10 years mA! Ofcourse things changed. The first two years were all about just the two of us.
As more responsibility (children, careers, finances, responsibility of aging parents) came the relationship changed. But it changed for the better. I think that's where love/care is tested the most.
In the beggining there are a lot of words "you can't live without the person" - "I love you", "I need you". After 10 years you literally will see those words come to life by actions. You depend on each other for everything. You run like a well oiled machine.
My parents have been married for 40 years. They had a love marriage. I think their marriage has came back full circle because the kids are all married. They have the house to themselves. They have more time for each other. They are actually back to square one.
njgal, remember what I said earlier about your posts? :D
Re: LOVE Marriage - relationship change afterwards???
I think that many people are unable to differentiate between a "love" marriage and a "lust" marriage. Bollywood romances have really warped the idea in most young people's mind about what love is. They have an idealized impression that a love marriage means that they will have a natural understanding with their spouse, and that there will never be conflict.
Reality is that marriage is difficult, no matter how the couple meets and marries. An arranged marriage with no mental compatibility or mutual attraction is bound to fail unless it is held together by societal and familial pressures. Likewise, a love marriage with the expectation of a "filmi" life after marriage is similarly bound for failure.