I just posted the above have a look....
Love marriages and arranged marriages and infact all relationships change after a period of time normally.
I have been married just over a year now and it was a love marriage and as far as i see it nothing has changed at all. He still loves me the same way but more that when we got married and vice-a-versa. He still buy's me small gifts and act silly and sometimes just to make me smile.
However i have seen some people that after marriage the couples find that being together is normal and not special anymore and that is a reason why it is said that so many love marriages fail because of the expectation one has of how they will be treated after. One expects gifts, i hug when he see's you, not to get angry etc etc. Where as with arranges marriages everything is a mystery and no expectaions lie.
Before i got married i only saw my husband once alone....every other time they would come to our house and we would go to there, and keep in mind our is a love marriage. He still used to buy me gifts, and presents and so on , and i did as well.
After marriage it was the same and now i have come to expect certain things which i know he will never stop doing such as, a hug when he sees me, a kiss a night, being loving to me etc.
After i got married i transferred to the same law firm where he is a partner and even though we work together we never get enough.
KIP, i am very pleased for u that your relationship is going well, mashallah.
You have raised a very good point about expectations. In an arranged marriage where the partner is unknown before, can we expect certain things from them?
Also, in a (for the sake of this thread i'll call it "love marriage") do partners REALLY expect the relationship to NOT turn "normal" and then get disappointed when they do?