Re: losing my sleep over an issue
njmasti ur prb is exact like mine. i m feelin so numb rite now.. dunno wot to say. i worked my ass off for 2 1/2 yrs becus my hubs cudnt afford to pay the bills. all this time i paid more than half the rent, groceries was 90 percent spent from my money... and yet i always heard big deal women do that.. here lifestyle is like that. many women do it but dun ask for ahsaan! all i ask is ahsaan and thankfulness. acc to him i made him cringe each month while i paid the montly house rent and made him feel inferior. like u i felt my efforts were undermined and not appreciated when others were always praisin that wow u handle everythin house and work. i admit he used to help me alot MA. he always cleaned the house whenever guests wud come... scrub floors and bathrooms and all but in his heart i think he never appreciated wot i was doin for him. as a result i didnt cook much... maybe 2 or max 3 times a week. and he wud taunt me at that and tell my parents i dun cook mch and 90 percent we eat out. its true i m a foodie i love eatin out but this was plain exaggeration. can u even imagine someone wud eat out nearly everyday?? its just plain common sense.
like u he is always interested in my savings. MA i have a v gud amount saved for myself really. its not for him or anyone! and nowdays he dusnt have money for anything he tells me to go and spend money from that.. not only that i m preg with my first baby and he is sayin he dusnt have the money and if i have so mch ghairat i shud probably pay. yeah so my life is rotten hell esp abt money. i dun understand how any man can b so unmanly enuff to worry abt his wife's saving. i worked my ass off to save this money.. AH i managed despite payin the bills and all.. my salary was gud AH. like u even i paid for my shoes, handbags and even clothes in these workin yrs.. his life mst have been so blissful then. and on top of that his MIL once told my mom and then her friend ke yeh toh shouqiya job karti hia. i felt i cud just........... hello, i m not ambitious. i m such a lazy bum and so not career oriented.. i m workin becus ur son is incapable of takin care of the finances. talk abt being unappreciated from everyone! now AH i m not workin since 6 months and everything is on his head. gud... its high time he took the responsibility.
NJ remember this is YOUR money and he has NO rite on it ok. give islamic references also. my hubs KNOWS he has no business in my money yet he emotionally and psychologically makes me cry for e verythin i want in the house.. even b it groceries! just hang in there and do not at any cost give him the money... can u not leave this job.. give him a dose of his own med..? let him see the difference. when ull b at home doin all the housework and 0 income comin, iwud like to see how happy he is with this. when he keeps on tellin u not to work he indirectly is unthankful for ur job and puttin the blame on u. so seriously cant u leave the job or are u too career oriented?