i am sick and tired of my mom and aunties repeating to me. “nia log kia kahein gay”. I mean wht the heck they wont be there when i need a shoulder to cry but when i have a announcement i know i dont need to throw a party for that. Some aunties will do that honor with no problem.
Why should i worry about what would people think. I cant seem to understand that concept .
If a couple does not have a child after 2 yrs of shadi there we go those stupid people will start talking about if they can concieve or not. I mean its none of your damn business keep your ****ty tounge out of it.
If the engagement is for too long they will start asking when will be shadi.I mean what the fudge… why cant people keep their mouth to themselves and worry about dramas that are going on in their house.
log gaey bhar mein the hell with them . I know no one will be there for me during my rainy days so why should i worry about what they think. Why should their opinion matter to me? i probably wont see more than half of them in my life.
** shudnt care about people ** .. ur born free no doubt! but if u ignore all those feelings attached to you .. i m afraid chances are there for u to be left alone in a long run .. u do need those people in sudden matters ..
but as far as personal life concirns .. i'd say if u and ur WOH ;) are agreed upon something then u must not realy worry abt ppl .. but again WHO THOSE PEOPLE ARE .. u can lay off aunty, massi, phupphi, khala but u might wana justify it to ur SASO AMMA or other close relatives who u realy think might understand.
but i think if ur hubby wana make a baby but for some reason ur trying to pull it of for later then i guess its a sin too.
bomby - :p i only got nikahfied no rukhsati so kid is out of question... i just made few statements that i been hearing a lot... I strongly feel i dont need to sit there and listen to those aunties. YEah society. i wonder if i want to raise kids in this society. People dont realize their focus should be their family not whats gong on in so and so's house they may not realize that thy could be out of focus in no time...
i think we should put all aunties to work..there should be rule that they have to work part time 20 hrs a week. i swear world would be at peace....
ab sari aunties ko job per bhej doo gi to fir meri amma ka kya baney ga :( .. meno khana kon deve ga :crying-boothi:
and yar thats just typical na .. and trust me its just not in our DESI society .. it goes down in almost every athenic group .. its not like cultural thing its more like blood heritage coming through humen ancestory .. but yup its enoying .. and since u living in this world uve to face it :) .. dont worry baji jeee .. sab theeek ho jaaai ga :)
no matter wut u do…they’re gona talk. chaahe koi achi baat ho ya buri…loug hamesha kuch na kuch bolte hain…n desi parents r just toooo worried bout that. my parents r the same way…itni mushkilon se ami ko samjhaaya hai ke it doesnt matter wut ppl say…
I agree with you Nia, When i was newly married pple start to ask if there was
good news i was like what the heck im just married!! Now it is 7 yrs and i've no kid(s)
and my mom i n law tells me the pple start talkin'now coz ur married bout 7 yrs and no childerens. But Nia logon to baatein kartey rehtey hai apne aap ko nahi dekthe hai.
I also hate this kind of pplz.
I hear ya gurl!!! i’ve learned over and over again not to fuss about pesky relatives, nosy aunts, jealous cousins and egotistic and masochistic uncles who cant stand independent and carefree women.
its funny how on one hand our families believe that allah is the ultimate judge of our actions but on the other hand every action in their life is shaped around what ‘dunya wale’ think. i tell this to my mom when she bothers me that if i am doing something wrong it is between me and my god and if i go to hell for it it wont affect these people right? and words will hurt only as much as u let them.
I was 18 when I got married and it was already a lot of pressure when my mother in law and my Mom wanted us to have kids immediately, they were worried about me, if I was capable of having children.
(Why is it that people are more worried about girls being able to have kids and they are less worried about wether or not their boy is able to have children?)
Then after a while every Pakistani person we ran into or visited had the same questions and comments. My cousin was married just a few weeks after me, she got pregnant very quickly and then people turned it into a race! My parents have some 'modern' Pakistani friends here and they said stuff like: "Your cousin has one child already, tum to peechai rai gai ho." I felt like shouting at them "Hey I'm not a sheep or a cow and this is not a race." Of course I just smiled at them.
I wasn't ready to have kids yet, but because of my Mom and my Mother in law and also 'society' I gave in. Even though it took us another two years to become parents I still feel I wasn't ready adn parenthood was too soon for me. But today I can't imagine a life without my kids! I love those sweet little brats, alhamdulilah.
:-D
Anyway, it's true people always find something to talk about. When you do something, they go like why did she do that? When you don't do something, they go like why didn't she do that?
Nia, I agree, they should all definetly be put to work!
Your family (mom and aunties) are part of this 'loag' brigade
they are so afraid of. It seems like they themselves are concerned
as much as these 'loag' about your life. Maybe you should start
by getting over your immediate relatives' talking about you and then eventually
you'll shrug off the rest of this 'loag' charade too.
tell your mom, if she wants a new child in the family so badly, she should try. You have your own time table and maybe the fking loagon will have to wait it out for you, when you are god and ready. Give a big middle finger when you are saying all this.
While its all fine and dandy to act like you don't care for rest of the world, and most times, some of the meddling aunties can be really irritating, but fact is, man is a social animal. You most likely do not live in a bubble, so be coignizant of societal values and norms. Make sure that when the time is right, you get all these "laug" to come up with a nice gift at your Baby Shower. Play the system, instead of getting pissed. :)
out of all replies i agree with kher Andesh Faisala aunty the most. logaan hi toa hain joa aap koa is site pay laatai hain muun thora kholnai kai liyai :)
n then u’d hafta hear it from parents aye