LOL Wedding night issue

[queer]

Re: LOL Wedding night issue

No offense but why do people think its a duty to do it at the first night?

Desis put pressure on themselves

yup, the smart ones plan ahead. do it the night before. muahahah..

jk jk

[M_was_here]

Re: LOL Wedding night issue

What I dont understand is, why are you feeling obligated to have sex yet you can't even change in front of him or bring these issues up yourself to him? Why on earth would you want to have sex w/ someone you aren't even that close with?! It's not compulsory to have sex the first night, is it? I dont know, I dont understand how some couples can do this yet feel too shy to bring up REAL issues. IMO, get to know him first before you guys do it.

[khattichic]

Re: LOL Wedding night issue

What I dont understand is, why are you feeling obligated to have sex yet you can't even change in front of him or bring these issues up yourself to him? Why on earth would you want to have sex w/ someone you aren't even that close with?! It's not compulsory to have sex the first night, is it? I dont know, I dont understand how some couples can do this yet feel too shy to bring up REAL issues. IMO, get to know him first before you guys do it.

I have a cousin in KHI who told her husband the same thing...it was a total arranged marriage, she only saw him at her mangni, and then maybe once or twice until the nikkah/rukhsati...she told him that she needed time to to get to know him first and that she couldn't bring herself to be intimate with a total stranger...I think it took a lot of guts for her to be so forward, considering this was back in the late 80's....

[pakiQueen]

Re: LOL Wedding night issue

Stay in hotel honey. And whether you want to have sex with him or not it is up to you guys. But make sure you guys have privacy plus bathroom too!.

[Doppleganger]

Re: LOL Wedding night issue

No offense but why do people think its a duty to do it at the first night?

Desis put pressure on themselves

If you can't get it up the first night, then chances are bad for the later nights as well considering this part of life goes downhill fast and your saas wants 5 kids as soon as possible.

What I dont understand is, why are you feeling obligated to have sex yet you can't even change in front of him or bring these issues up yourself to him? Why on earth would you want to have sex w/ someone you aren't even that close with?! It's not compulsory to have sex the first night, is it? I dont know, I dont understand how some couples can do this yet feel too shy to bring up REAL issues. IMO, get to know him first before you guys do it.

You necessarily don't have to take all clothes off for the act.

[quote]
yup, the smart ones plan ahead. do it the night before. muahahah..
[/quote]

Jazak'allah khair.

[pakiQueen]

Re: LOL Wedding night issue

^LOL!

[Naabigh]

Re: LOL Wedding night issue

@ShahreyarKhan

quite frankly thats why you stay in a hotel room for the first few nights

Not every one can afford a hotel - A night in a hotel like Avari towers / PC could easily cost you upto 195 to 250 USD easily - forget Penthouse suites - they start from 700$ per night …

You are asking them to stay in a hotel for first few nights - let us say they get a good deal for a week in 750 $ all taxes included - Now in Pakistani currency it would be around 67,000 approx …

Even in this time and era - one can pitch a valima dinner for 150 to 200 guests with a decent menu in 60,000 to 70,000 …

so darling - start living in the real world - no every one , who uses internet from Pakistan is a millionaire .

@TLK

That is quite a genuine question Sabs. .

It is indeed - and I am really surprised , do we really not have any one from a middle class family here on GS .. do we not have people , who have grown with having common bathrooms in their houses ..

Although the trend is now changing thesedays - even in 120 yards houses , you atleast have one attached bathroom but till this date more then 60 % of houses have common bathrooms ..

@Kinzz

Bas isi thread Ki kami thee.

and what’s wrong with it ?

@Pepsi_ki_Botal

demand a bathroom be built in your room!

Bring a Portable one in your Jehaz - Demand

@firenze

where in the world human don’t have washroom attach to bedroom

In faisalabad a place where you belong to

@ShahreyarKhan

well then you have a serious problem

It is not a problem at all …

@M_was_here

What I dont understand is, why are you feeling obligated to have sex yet you can’t even change in front of him or bring these issues up yourself to him? Why on earth would you want to have sex w/ someone you aren’t even that close with?! It’s not compulsory to have sex the first night, is it? I dont know, I dont understand how some couples can do this yet feel too shy to bring up REAL issues. IMO, get to know him first before you guys do it.

where did she say - she is going to have sex on her first night ?

You dont only do Ghusal after having sex ..

Stop putting words in her mouth

[muqawwee123]

Re: LOL Wedding night issue

What I dont understand is, why are you feeling obligated to have sex yet you can't even change in front of him or bring these issues up yourself to him? Why on earth would you want to have sex w/ someone you aren't even that close with?! It's not compulsory to have sex the first night, is it? I dont know, I dont understand how some couples can do this yet feel too shy to bring up REAL issues. IMO, get to know him first before you guys do it.

I have a cousin in KHI who told her husband the same thing...it was a total arranged marriage, she only saw him at her mangni, and then maybe once or twice until the nikkah/rukhsati...she told him that she needed time to to get to know him first and that she couldn't bring herself to be intimate with a total stranger...I think it took a lot of guts for her to be so forward, considering this was back in the late 80's....

This reminds me the incident told by a colleague recently.

His friend took one month after marriage to develop the understanding required for moving to actual 'Act'.

I said to him: Your friend seems to be a character of Indian soaps, where: 'Pehle Dosti hoti hai, phir mohabbat hoti hai, phir dosti aur mohabbat ki ..... ...... hoti hai'. :)

[Sannan]

Re: LOL Wedding night issue

@TLK

For the third question, two things can be done.

1. Be bold about it. People (your in laws, if they noticed) would actually appreciate it that you did not leave your fajr even on your wedding night. Go out around early morning and do your ghusl.
2. Another thing that can be done (and not so difficult as rukhsati and other rasm dont finish till like 3 in the morning) is that delay that actual “act” till after fajar, and then sleep in till noon time.

@M_was_here

What I dont understand is, why are you feeling obligated to have sex yet you can’t even change in front of him or bring these issues up yourself to him? Why on earth would you want to have sex w/ someone you aren’t even that close with?! It’s not compulsory to have sex the first night, is it? I dont know, I dont understand how some couples can do this yet feel too shy to bring up REAL issues. IMO, get to know him first before you guys do it.

main aap key inqalabi sooch say buhat mutasir howa hoon :cobra:

[Southie]

Re: LOL Wedding night issue

Something tells me I should not ask what ghusal means. So I wont

[Sannan]

Re: LOL Wedding night issue

@Southie

Something tells me I should not ask what ghusal means. So I wont

ghussal means take a proper bath :cobra:

[Southie]

Re: LOL Wedding night issue

^ I think I will channel Gavaskar and shoulder arms, letting it go safely to the wicketkeeper.

[Sannan]

Re: LOL Wedding night issue

Defensive approach

[Naabigh]

Re: LOL Wedding night issue

This reminds me the incident told by a colleague recently.

His friend took one month after marriage to develop the understanding required for moving to actual 'Act'. :)

No offence - but if some one needs a month to get it done - then he is not a MAN in my dictionary :)

[muqawwee123]

Re: LOL Wedding night issue

No offence - but if some one needs a month to get it done - then he is not a MAN in my dictionary :)

hahaha. That was quite shocking for us when we heard this... because all the aaqil o baligh (adult) persons know what is the objective of Nikah when they say 'Qabool hai qabool hai'.

[firenze]

Re: LOL Wedding night issue

No offense but why do people think its a duty to do it at the first night?

ancient ritual?

[amaya]

Re: LOL Wedding night issue

What I dont understand is, why are you feeling obligated to have sex yet you can't even change in front of him or bring these issues up yourself to him? Why on earth would you want to have sex w/ someone you aren't even that close with?! It's not compulsory to have sex the first night, is it? I dont know, I dont understand how some couples can do this yet feel too shy to bring up REAL issues. IMO, get to know him first before you guys do it.

I hv heard from my elders that it is compulsory on the wedding night according to SUNNAH and walima purpose is that after wedding night groom 's parents will eat dinner at least 60 poeple.
I am nt quite sure how much it is right. but elders said the same.

[amaya]

Re: LOL Wedding night issue

Soooo, what if you get married and live with the in-laws. What if you dont have a bathroom in your room the first night? I mean do you just change in front of him/her- and for girls makeup, will you leave your room, go into the bathroom, and wash your fase then run to your room? I mean think about it. This has me wondering.

AND

when/how would you do the ghusl after wedding night if you have to perform Fajr prayers? =)

it is quite simple i think. if u r nt franked with ur husband must be hv much meeting with ur in laws. there would be ur bhabies mean jethani yah dawerani ya nanad. must be anyone who will tell u how can u tackle with prob. if in laws r good they will guide u urself.
otherwise hubby himself knws after wedding night ghusl must. he will tell u.

[Naabigh]

Re: LOL Wedding night issue

@amaya

I hv heard from my elders that it is compulsory on the wedding night according to SUNNAH and walima purpose is that after wedding night groom 's parents will eat dinner at least 60 poeple.
I am nt quite sure how much it is right. but elders said the same.

Not it is not

[NomiCA]

Re: LOL Wedding night issue

if u don't do it....walima haraam hota hai (so i heard)..........walima is celebration for consummation aka the 'act'..