Living near girls parents not in laws

[Paheli00]

Re: Living near girls parents not in laws

@naima27

Yeah husband is very understanding. Although sometimes he seems to still be under the illusion that they will be able to help/will want to help. I said to him before they even said they can’t, that they have too many other commitments of their own day to day and they also spend a few months every year abroad. I need help where someone can commit properly like my mother has offered to - not just babysit on the odd night as I will be working. My in laws will end up being 1.5 hours drive away. When they said they can’t help they asked us to think about an area that’s half way but that doesn’t work because in order for my parents to help I need to be maximum 15 mins away otherwise we will spend so much time just doing drop off pick ups. I didn’t give it too much thought but the other day when I mentioned we have started looking at houses my mum
said I need to be 100%… What if they get sick, hes the only son around. They are in Pakistan atm so haven’t had a chance to discuss yet but when we do obviously husband will do the talking.

I think your reasons are very valid. Dependable childcare is an absolute must if both you and your husband are working. Since you in-laws have already told you that they cannot commit to watching your child on a regular schedule, you/husband have no choice but to move close to your parents.

Unless your husband is willing to pay for outside childcare. But if you/husband want your children to be raised by a family member…them moving close to your parents seems to be the best solution right now. Also, I assume YOU will the one dropping off and picking up the kids from your mom’s house every day. Unless your husband is willing to share this task equally, its not fair for him (or anyone else) to ask you to live in an area halfway. I know people who do this daily with their kids and it sucks. All that driving back and forth is precious time that could be spend at home with the entire family taking care of other things.

As for his parents getting sick…that may or may not happen. Future is unpredictable. Right now the problem is finding dependable childcare. Solve that problem. In the future if another problem comes up, worry about solving it then.