Re: Life of a Widow
this. Ashy you can see here where Im coming from. Again, getting a life doesnt really mean to wear bright clothes only. They are purely one’s choice. Many people dont wear bright even at young age. But being young and consciously NOT dying your hair, taking care of your self and dress well only because “what people might say” is sickening. Hello its not "people"s life. Its about how “people” and their fear affects your lifestyle. I wish widows were stronger enough to mu torh once who passes such comments so that they keep their mouth shut the next time. We cannot simply allow everyone to make us so vulnerable. I think its a hinduish soch. where does Islam ask widows to wear white?
And for some clarification:
1: people at work are never “sweet and soft spoken” without being diplomatic. So we take such behaviours only as good as they dont affect us. Being sweet and soft spoken, and giving such comments is very very common in the women social circle.
2: a few days before this colleague said this, (complimented my friend’s “sudden change of dress sense in only a year,” the year her husband died), another one, a lady clerk at our college, who used to act so sympathetic and all that to her, asked, “tussi aye lipstick waghera gharon la ke anday o?” (she likes to talk in punjabi at work) and the friend took out and showed her that it was a lip gloss only and at that she said “nahi nahi koi baat nai bas aithey a ke la liya karo tey ghar jan to pehle mu dho liya karo”. Now look at it and tell me was this also as innocent and baji-like suggestion? She made it look like as if she was doing something wrong so she should be careful about it. using a lip gloss only??
And these two incidents happened in front of me. Im sure she would be hearing such things everyday from one or another. And one day soon, she will give in.