Re: Lending People Money
Once you lend money, you feel like you are their benefactor and feel like you are above them.
Then if they don't pay respects to you every time they see you or agree with everything you say, you will feel slighted and annoyed.
Re: Lending People Money
^ If I'm paying their rent, then I'd expect to know every single detail of what they're doing to pay their next month's rent. Depending on the very specifics of the situation.....I would help them out temporarily. Otherwise, they're on their own.
When there are children involved in a situation, I have no problem helping someone out AS LONG AS they're also willing to help themselves. If the threat of their children being homeless doesn't get them to act in a responsible manner....then I wouldn't have any problem turning them away during the 2nd or 3rd month.
This situation does not have a black/white response in my opinion. Everything depends on the very specifics of the situation. If someone continues to have a financial "emergency" every other month....then of course I wouldn't tolerate that.
Re: Lending People Money
like my dad says ... jo paise de nahi sakte woh udhaar bhi nahi do ... so thats wat i go by ... i only lend the amount that wouldn't really bother me if not paid back
Re: Lending People Money
we have someone in the family that is constantly living out of thier means and always in debt and always asking. they owe everybody in the family and outside of it money and always need to borrow to pay off someone else, awful awful, but they don't help themselves.
I lent money to them once, and getting it back from them was like mission impossible, not only that i was almost hated for requesting it back, won't do it again thats for sure
Re: Lending People Money
hmmmmmmmmmmm.
Re: Lending People Money
If someone in your extended family called you and asked for large sum of money however their track record was not really good about returning money. Would you lend them money if you had it in your savings and you can comfortably do without?
Would you think that they would pay it back? Would you hold a grudge if they didn't? Would you just give and forget that it won't come back to you. Would you lie that you didn't have it. (it would be clear lie). Would you be direct and say that you don't trust them to return the money? Would you give a smaller sum that you can live without that you wouldn't mind that they didn't return.
Depends on the amount really. If the amount they asked for is around my salary, and I have extra, I'd give it to them - not really expecting to get it back but if its actual saving from months, I'd let them know, its my saving and I cannot give that. If they are willing to take a smaller amount, no problem with me.
Re: Lending People Money
If it was something that they needed for everyday expense, and if it was comfortable for you to live without the money, that I wouldn't lend it to that person. Instead I would see it as Zakat and give it to that person for their needs and pray that someone would be able to help me if I were ever in that situation.
Re: Lending People Money
If it was something that they needed for everyday expense, and if it was comfortable for you to live without the money, that I wouldn't lend it to that person. Instead I would see it as Zakat and give it to that person for their needs and pray that someone would be able to help me if I were ever in that situation.
would they qualify for zakat?
Re: Lending People Money
It depends on many factors. If its close/immediate family, would I hold it against them if they dont return for whatever reason? Nope.
For not so immediate family, it depends on their need. If money could save someones life, I wouldn't care if they return it or not. As long as there is great need, I wouldn't hold it against them.
There are some things that you do just out of love.
If someone says they would return but then they dont, well too bad. I just wouldn't trust them again.