I am working in a family business where the business have increased alot but my remuneration has not. After more than 10 years my pay low and not upto market. I did have flexibility but i work full time hours overall and 2nd in charge.
He/she plans for expansion of th business but me as in charge and controlling but not much increase in my pay.
I feel i am under paid for ny work and theres no future for me.
Now i want to start my own business. I dont know how to tell this to the owner of the business. He/she is very close to me. I feel like i will be breaking the persons heart if i do and will impact the future goals. but than i need to do some thing for myself and my kids as well. 10+ years is a long time. I can make more $$ within few years if i start myself.
Have you discussed with them to increase your pay? Why haven't they already done so? Why are they keeping it below the market rate? If they're exploiting you, the last thing I would worry about is breaking their heart. I suspect you have not mentioned everything in terms of your reasons for staying in your current position, especially when you know you can do better and they are paying less than what you're worth on the market.
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Have you discussed with them to increase your pay? Why haven’t they already done so? Why are they keeping it below the market rate? If they’re exploiting you, the last thing I would worry about is breaking their heart. I suspect you have not mentioned everything in terms of your reasons for staying in your current position, especially when you know you can do better and they are paying less than what you’re worth on the market.
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No I havent discussed with them about increase in pay. bringing this issue up means arguing and i will have to prove my ability and i can not do that.
To be honest i can not stand up for myself. i have experience, education, knowledge and i am liked by my clients. i dont see any issue why i can not do.
the reason i stayed was flexibility. I can pickup kids from scbool. Can go home early. work from home as well. plus family business more control over how and when i do.
before starting work in family business i was fresh graduate with no experience and was struggling to find a job. this has lowered my confidence.
Then you should ask for a raise. I don’t know what industry you’re in here, but a lot of companies I’ve seen recently are quite flexible. If you can manage your workload and still pick up your kids from school and work from home, then chances are you’ll get that same flexibility in similar positions with other companies.
So much lower is your pay compared to what you can make?
One thing you can do is apply to similar companies, then show them you have an offer where they’re ready to pay you more and ask them if they’re ready to match that or even exceed that or else you can go work there instead. This should be a two way street. If you’re giving up something to stay with the family business, then the business should also compensate you accordingly Also, if you don’t own stock in it or share from its profits, then it’s just a business that belongs to some family member.
I employ 12 permanent staff at two sites. None of them are close to me on a personal level and none of them are indespendable. Still I make sure I increase their pay year on year even if my businesses are not doing as well as they did. My staff turn around ratio is very low. because I proactively look after my staff and enjoy their loyalty and efficiency in returm. Looks like your employer needs some training and education into staff management and creating an employee-friendly atmosphere. 10 years is a long time, if the business is doing well and expanding, they should have realised the wages should go up as well. This means they are either naive (which I doubt), or mean and shrewd, not passing on the profits to their employees for all their hardword. I will look for other opportunities and walk away at the right time. All the best.
If you want to start your own business it doesnt matter if they increase the money or no. You follow your desire, your dream that ultimately becomes your goal. Its ok to move on. Yes you helped them, they helped you but doesnt mean you get tied up with them forever.
Then you should ask for a raise. I don’t know what industry you’re in here, but a lot of companies I’ve seen recently are quite flexible. If you can manage your workload and still pick up your kids from school and work from home, then chances are you’ll get that same flexibility in similar positions with other companies.
So much lower is your pay compared to what you can make?
One thing you can do is apply to similar companies, then show them you have an offer where they’re ready to pay you more and ask them if they’re ready to match that or even exceed that or else you can go work there instead. This should be a two way street. If you’re giving up something to stay with the family business, then the business should also compensate you accordingly Also, if you don’t own stock in it or share from its profits, then it’s just a business that belongs to some family member.
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my cousin under graduate in the same field earns more than me. my pay over past 10 years is equal if not less than a retail worker.
i fear if i apply to other companies i might not get flexibility and my experience is not at high corporate level. i have worked in small to medium consultancy level. i did check some jobs of my experience and level the
@navzzz at my work concept is minimum should go out. my wage did go up but still its below industry average after more than 10 years. imagine what i started with. i wish i could disclose. i laugh at myself sometimes when i think of it.
@SID_NY, yes i prefer to start my own now. i have all licences that I need. if i start i start my own i am confidant i can breakeven 1st year and hopefully will make what i do now in 2nd year.
I just dont know how to tell my current employer. He/she expects me to be with the business till my last day.
other reason I think i should move on is if in next 5 or 6 years their kids (who are expected and they want to) start working. i don’t want to work under them. regardless of whether they have experience they show their entitlement towards the business.
i am also finding it hard to think about leaving. from 1st day the business opened its door i was there. i grew with the business. i suffered with it too. when it didnt earn i didn’t get paid. when it did alot i gt little.
mentally i am stuck with it. even leaving is my right i dont want to severe my ties with any1. but i dont think it there will be happy ending.
You will have to prove your ability and you “cannot do that.” Therein lies your problem. You’ve basically made a contradiction, or at least that’s how I see it. On one hand you say that you have the experience, the education, the knowledge, and the approval of your clients…all the things you need to prove yourself…and yet you still say you can’t do it.
People will always look out for their own interests first. That is just human nature. And this is precisely why we have to sometimes be a bit selfish in life. You have admitted that you have not spoken to your boss about giving you a raise. Well, that is a risk that you will have to take. NOW…if your boss TRULY believes that you are an asset to their business…then they won’t let you go easily. Since your boss also happens to be a family member, one of two things is going to happen. Either they will guilt trip you into submission…or…they will try to negotiate a compromise with you because they don’t want to lose you. You won’t find out…until you bite the bullet and ask them. If your boss is willing to increase your salary to an amount that you are satisfied with in exchange for extra work from you…then you WILL have to “prove yourself” and you can’t approach it with the “I cannot do it” attitude. Now…if your boss either silences you into submission with a guilt trip or refuses to raise your pay and you feel that you cannot take this anymore…then they have provided you with reason to leave. The thing is, Roshni, if your boss is selfishly safeguarding his interests by keeping you at the same pay even after 10 years…then it’s okay for you to be selfish and leave. People will guilt trip you for things that they erroneously believe is their “haqq” or “right” over you…but so long as it’s not a gunnah…(and it isn’t)…you can make your path. BUT…just make sure that you have the finances and everything in order…before leaving to start your own business.
If you’re already saying that “I will have to prove my ability and I cannot do that”…keep in mind that even starting your own business will require you to prove your ability as a leader to yourself and to those who will work under you. So, whether you choose to accept the increased responsibilities (at your current place of employment) that will come with a higher pay…OR…whether you start your own business…you will have to approach both outcomes with an “I Will Prove Myself” attitude.
So, go forth with courage and hard work…but there are few other things you can do to increase your rizq or sustenance. In the Quran Allah says that He will increase our rizq if we do abundant istighfar. Abundant durood is also a way to bring blessings into your life. So try do recite as much istighfar and durood as you can. And the dua that Hazrat Musah (AS) made… “Rabbishrah li sadri ya yassir li amir wahlul uqdatum min lisani yafqahu qawli”…can be recited for when we need confidence in speaking to someone like a boss…let’s say. You can google the translation of this dua and you’ll understand why people recite it when they are in need of courage or in need of having the other person (in this case, your boss) understand their point of view. Lastly, you can also do istikhara if you are struggling to decide between two outcomes. Best wishes.
I might not have used the right words when i said about proving ability. what i meant was this is my 2nd place of work and i mostly learnt at this place and i dont have experience of working in big corporate environment. i manage this place as well. I am second in charge after the owner. Knowing the person, questions will be raised on my loylty to the business and than i will be told i am not capable of doing it. and is whatbi meant.
this is what i fear “Either they will guilt trip you into submission…or…they will try to negotiate a compromise with you because they don’t want to lose you”. and i know this is going to happen.
Before i thought of just quitting and when i causally mentioned i was told i cant and that i need this job.
They manipulated and exploited you. You owe them nothing. Many employers do that. Love and respect is only evidenced by actions. Their actions have been exploitative
You will be successful
You can either stay and not say anything and watch as their kids eventually come in and take over with you having to work under them. Then in a short time (if not right from the beginning) you will see how they not only outrank you in terms of position/perks/freedoms, while you still do all the work, but you can be sure that they’ll also earn more than you as well. Or you stand up for yourself and either demand more for what you do. A very easy way for that is to show them an offer from someone else for the same work. If they’re not ready to give you more, then go to the competitor or start your own business. If you ask me, getting berated/blackmailed for lack of loyalty and whatnot while getting more for your worth is much better than what you can expect in 5-7 years. You have the perfect answer to that by telling them how much a competitor would pay and remind them what you’ve put in and how little you’ve got out of it.
If you were to look for another job and tell them the flexibility you enjoy now, you will very likely find someone who will work to accommodate you. I know this because I’ve done the same. If you haven’t done so already, put your resume out there on any number of job sites or linkedin and you’ll be in a position of even greater power if they reach out to you first.
This is a business relationship. Not a personal relationship. You don’t owe them anything. Certainly not the rest of your life. Take care of yourself and your family
Roshni, talk to your employer and see how they respond. If they don't budge at all and try to make you feel as if you're dependent on them or need them......then leave. If you have all your ducks in a row and are confident about staring your own business, then do it. If this is a dream of yours, you won't be able to fulfill it by remaining passive. Make dua for courage and success. And if this is the route you're going to take then be prepared to be met with family jealousy, resentment, and pressure. Even among family you will find relatives that are sincere and those that are not sincere. That's just a part of life.
Look at it as if it's a toxic marriage, you survived (rather than thrived) these 10 years, after investing so much time and effort into this marriage and you don't get much in return. Just bread crumbs. Sometimes ending a relatiinship seems impossible, but it's the only thing that will set you free. If you're not appreciated and instead the othet party takes advantage of your kindness, why do you wanna continue to be stuck in such a relationship?
Just try looking for other employers while you're working under him/her. You would be financially safe this way. However no harm in talking to your employer. Sometimes it's the way you speak to your employer matters.
Wish you good luck.
I agree with those who said leave, don’t get exploited. You have two options assuming you will leave.
1) Before leaving, Find another job. Then leave. This way, you have protected yourself. With this experience, it may be useful before you start your own business