Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: “Shut up, dammit, all of you just shut UP!”
Make race car noises when anyone gets on or off.
Sell Girl Scout cookies.
Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: “Got enough air in there?” ------ *
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Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down.
Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your kleenex to other passengers.
When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves. ------ *
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Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshakeand ask them to call you Admiral.
Do Tai Chi exercises.
Meow occasionally.
Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.
Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce “You’re one of THEM!” and move to the far corner of the elevator.
Burp, and then say “mmmm…tasty!”
Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for them.
When the elevator is silent, look around and ask “is that your beeper?”
Say “Ding!” at each floor.
Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.
Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your “personal space.” ------ *
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Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings. ------ * eeyucck. *
Announce in a demonic voice: “I must find a more suitable host body.”
Stare at your thumb and say “I think it’s getting larger.”
Start brushing off invisible bugs from your arms, screaming “Aaughh! Get them off!”
Laugh hysterically for five seconds, stop, and glare at the other passengers like they are crazy.
Charge into the elevator dripping wet, holding a towel and wearing only a bath robe. Mutter something about how husbands/wives always come home early just when it’s getting to the good part.
As the elevator is going up, jump violently up and down, shouting “Down! I said down, dammit!” ------ *
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http://www3.pak.org/gupshup/smilies/biggrin.gif
Try to get a game of “Twister” going.
Wrinkle your nose and smell the air repeatedly. Sniff at your neighbor suspiciously, give a disgusted frown, and take a step away.