Some late night jokes, hope you like em.
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Leno:
Russia is going to give up on the space station Mir. It costs too much to keep it in orbit, so at some point next summer it will fall to Earth. hopefully it’ll land on Palm Beach!
Al Gore wants to meet with Governor Bush one on one to discuss the election. That and Gore is planning to slip Bush the tongue like he did to Tipper.
Gore keeps on talking about the will of the people. We need to trust the will of the people. Yeah, thats the same will of the people that made Charlie’s Angels the number one movie in the country.
We keep seeing the footage of Al Gore and his family playing football in the yard, looking like the Kennedy family. Really I hear the Gore family is pretty good at football. Last week they beat the San Diego Chargers 24 to 6!
We also saw footage of George W. playing fetch with his dog. Before they played fetch the dog had won two out three games of scrabble.
In New York City there is now a hotel for cats and dogs. A special hotel just for pets. How do you think that makes the homeless feel?
Letterman:
The news is still about Florida. The election is still even. Now a week ago this was exciting, now that several months have passed we still have no president and all the fun has wore off. In Florida we got three million for Bush and three million for Gore and thats just lawyers!
All the big shot lawyers are in Florida. Now if we had a hurricane. God forbid - this still could have a happy ending.
Today in Daytona Beach a wet t-shirt contest was dead locked in a tie!
Al Gore keeps saying that the will of the people is being repressed. Nor Bush or Gore won. Now isn’t that the will of the people?
George W. is so relaxed throughout all of this. Today he took some death row inmates and went to see Charlie’s Angels.
Now every week untill Clinton is out of office, which I’m guessing he will be at some point, we do a Clinton classic joke. Tonights Clinton classic is from October 6, 1998. Today Monica Lewinski gave prosecutors a picture of her standing next to Bill. Actually Bill is the only one standing.
lol!!!
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V~V~VHe came, He saw, He conqueredV~V~V**
----*Priest-OF- Painful Truth*----