I just recently heard that Islamically women shouldn’t change their name after they are married, they should keep the name their father has given them…does anybody know anything about this??
Re: last name after marriage
back then they didn't have family names. Instead the name of the tribe identified the husband and wife.
After wedding wife became part of her husband's tribe.
Things have changed now.
We don't identify ourselves with tribes any more. Perhaps in few tribal societies, but not in the civilized world.
So it is OK to change wife's last name to Husband's last name.
However if the wife is professional and she is known in her circles for her professional work, then it is OK for her to keep the last name instead of changing it.
There are options.
Re: last name after marriage
[QUOTE]
"Islam raised the status of women by placing the status of the mother above that of the father, and it has also given women the right to keep their own family names after marriage. The Muslim woman keeps her own surname and identity after marriage, and does not take her husband's name, as happens in the West where the married women is known by her husband's name as "Mrs.So-and-so," and her maiden name is cancelled from civic records. Thus Islam preserves the woman's identity after marriage: although the Muslim woman is strongly urged to be a good wife, obeying and respecting her husband, her identity is not to be swallowed up in his."
[/QUOTE]
The Ideal Muslimah - pg 49.
Re: last name after marriage
Ruling on wife taking the husband’s last name if the husband insists on that
I read on your website the questions and answers regarding the issue of women changing their surname upon marriage. My question is, can a husband force his wife to change her surname against her will? And what can the wife do if her husband and his family are pressurizing her to change her surname in the name of legal issues?.
Praise be to Allaah.
It is not permissible for a woman to take her husband’s name or his family name because that is attributing oneself to someone other than one’s father, and imitating the kuffaar from whom this custom was adopted.
Al-Bukhaari (3508) and Muslim (61) narrated from Abu Dharr (may Allaah be pleased with him) that he heard the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) say: “Any man who knowingly attributes himself to someone other than his father is guilty of kufr. Whoever claims to belong to a people when he has nothing to do with them, let him take his place in Hell.”
“when he has nothing to do with them” means, when he has no lineage among them, as is highlighted in some reports.
Based on that, the husband has no right to force his wife to do that, and if he forces her to do it she should not obey him, because it is obedience to a created being which involves disobedience to the Creator. So she should persist in her refusal and explain to him that it is haraam, and look for Islamically acceptable means of establishing her rights from a legal point of view.
For more information please see the answer to question no. 6241 and 1942.
And Allaah knows best
Re: last name after marriage
OK thanks! Clears a lot of things up.........
Re: last name after marriage
Yeah, Islamically it's not really allowed even tho most of us do it.. I wonder if double-barrelled would be ok as a compromise, I would find it so weird having a different surname to my children :(
Re: last name after marriage
I didnt change mine and i don't find it wierd,
I would actually find it wierd 'changing' my surname, it's who I am!
.... I would find it so weird having a different surname to my children :(
yeap. This is the point.
Establishing a family means, having a common last name.
It helps a lot in the West or in more advanced societies.
We don't have the concept of "husband's family name", so we end up following biradri, tribe, or husband's first name as a last name for the kids.
so it really depends where you are located geographically.