Kids who can't tell their parents they want to get married..

I mean going down the arranged route.. that they feel ready and would like their parents to start looking..

Just read about someone who said they don’t feel comfortable bringing it up with their parents.. This isn’t common, is it?

Re: Kids who can't tell their parents they want to get married..

**most parents start pushing their sons to get married as soon as they get a job...if they ask and you don't RESIST, that's the time to start looking for the bride.

in case of girls, as soon as their education is finished, they want them to get married...if those girls stop resisting...that's an indication that the daughter is ready for marriage.**
**
it's a different story that some parents want their daughters to stop further education after graduation.**

Re: Kids who can’t tell their parents they want to get married..

^Yeah, that’s very common..

I just found it weird that a girl or guy doesn’t feel comfortable saying ‘mum/dad, I want to get married.’ If you can’t say something as basic (and non-confrontational) as that surely you can’t have much of a relationship with them :confused:

Re: Kids who can't tell their parents they want to get married..

I think it has something to do w/ guys thinking their parents will think they're ready to have sex or want a physical relationship. It's stupid to think that way and I feel bad for parents who raised their kids to feel that way b/c it's such a basic need/want yet their own kids cant tell that to their own parents. Sad.

Re: Kids who can’t tell their parents they want to get married..

**‘status-quo’ has already been broken…most people are shying away from arranged marriage. i think it’s about time when men and women must speak up about who they wanna marry in arranged marriages rather than simply give their consent.


when sons/daughters keep quiet about their readiness for getting married is as a result of their respect, shyness and the way they have been brought up.**

Re: Kids who can't tell their parents they want to get married..

I used to have sympathy for these "kids" but after a couple of years....I don't!

Parents, for the most part, make their expectations clear early on, if they would be acceptable of a love marriage or not.....kids choose to ignore it thinking "love conquers all" or just don't bother to find out anything and choose to remain ignorant...they have to deal with the consequences!

Re: Kids who can't tell their parents they want to get married..

My good friend (male) is 24, is educated, has a good job now and REALLY wants to get married. He is a kind and loving person, and he loves children. He really wants a life partner to share his life with, and after dating a few girls and all of those relationships ending badly, he would like his mother to find him someone so that he can settle down.

However, he has 3 sisters, aged 27, 25, and 22 and his mother has made it clear that she wants all 3 of her daughters married before he does. They are in the process of looking for his eldest sister, but it's taking time because his sisters don't seem to be in any hurry to get married.

I feel terrible for my friend. He is going to watch ALLLLLLLLLLLLLL his friends get married and probably start having children before he can get married. It looks like he's going to have to wait at LEAST another 5 years. It's really unfortunate that his family feels this way. He's too hesitant to insist to his mother about marriage. He wants to be married soooo badly :(

Re: Kids who can't tell their parents they want to get married..

That's pretty unfair :(
well look at it this way...once they're all married, they'll be out of the house and less interfering and he'll have less repsonsibilities towards paying for their weddings...which should be less of a problem for his wife when he does get married...

Re: Kids who can't tell their parents they want to get married..

I feel bad for guys who have to ask their parents to get them sex / physical intimacy.

Re: Kids who can't tell their parents they want to get married..

now that just sounded wrong

Re: Kids who can't tell their parents they want to get married..

My mom says in older days, when sons of the family started spending less time at home with their parents and siblings, that was an indication to the parents that the sons needed to get married and they used to marry their sons so that the sons could start spending more time at home.

Usually, parents start looking for their sons marriages when they are settled in their careers and for daughters even before they complete their education. When parents delay their sons' marriages, its usually because they want their daughters to get married first. I didn't find any other reason of delaying the sons' marriages. We have discussed this many times in other threads that sons' marriages should not be delayed because of marriagable daughters. Such sons should wait a little until and then should have a discussion with their parents if they are close to them or with any of their siblings about their desire to get married. They can use logic and arguments that they have plans in mind about their life which can only be fulfiled if they marry at the right age.

Re: Kids who can't tell their parents they want to get married..

yeah it did agree with nimoca

Re: Kids who can't tell their parents they want to get married..

before sleeping

  • do wadu
  • read drood shareef three times
  • read ya lateefo 100 times
  • read drood shareef three times
  • make duwa
  • again read drood shareef
  • continue above steps whole month

inshaAllah chand sa lark/larki mil jaye ga/gi. :@:

Re: Kids who can't tell their parents they want to get married..

Jin ko chand sa larka/ larki mil jai, wo apne amma abba ko kese samjhain k ussi chand se shadi kerni hai :D

Aur jo log apne amma abba per dependent ho k chand sa larka/ larki dhoond ker dein aur un k amma abba un ki shaadi ko seriously na ley rahi hon.... tau us ka kia solution hai?

I believe, this happens with guys and girls usually don't have to convey to their parents that they are ready for marriage. Parents start looking for their daughters even before their daughter is ready for marriage and the daughter usually gets prepared with time since she starts receiving proposals which mentally prepares her for the marriage.

Re: Kids who can't tell their parents they want to get married..

ofoh, chand sa to mainy mahawaratan kaha tha.

i hope, op could show genuine request of marriage in front of parents. a repetition of same request in wise way is solution.

Re: Kids who can't tell their parents they want to get married..

Lekin ammian sirf mahawaratan nahi dhoondti chaand si bahu. Wo real main chand si bahu dhoondti hain :D

Re: Kids who can't tell their parents they want to get married..

It's normal I'd say. Depending on the family setup sometimes it's not easy to talk marriage with your parents.

Re: Kids who can't tell their parents they want to get married..

Not good

Re: Kids who can’t tell their parents they want to get married..

Play this LOUD . . . OVER AND OVER AGAIN .

Re: Kids who can’t tell their parents they want to get married..

^:hehe:
but ye tou sirf larkiyon ke liye hai…wht abt guys?