So I have finally conceived and my husband is ecstatic (its our second child). I’ve told only a few close friends at work and his and my immediate family, he wants to announce it to the whole world :D.
Those who know are saying that the news should not be made public in my first trimester, as nazar lagti hai plus there are more chances of something going wrong in the first trimester. I didn’t face this situation when i was pregnant with my first child, as we didn’t have such a big social circle then plus I had found out when my first trimester was almost over.
Also, a lot of my friends know that I’ve been looking forward to having a second child and I wanna share the good news with them
What did you girls do when you found out? Did you tell everyone you met or did you not tell till you started showing?
Since its my second pregnancy, I also feel that I’m already showing a bit (have a round bump) but maybe people will just think I’ve become fat
Mashallah!! Many congratulations to you Mia!! Wonderful news!!
The thing about telling people in the first trimester is how you would handle it if - God forbid - something goes wrong. In the vast majority of cases, if something is going to go wrong, it happens within the first 12 weeks. Its not a matter of bringing on bad luck but more a matter of how you would feel when the whole world knows so you have to tell the whole world if theres a miscarriage.
The reason that the first trimester is so critical is that sometimes women produce eggs that are not properly formed or an incorrectly formed sperm fertilizes the egg. It can still implant and develop but not beyond that 12-week mark. This is more common than most people realize.
If you feel that you'd be able to handle the sympathies and comments if something should go wrong then by all means start announcing. But if you're a more private type of person, hold off a bit. Those first weeks pass quickly and INshallah, everything will go smoothly.
ps...in all 5 of my pregnancies, I started shouting from the rooftops the moment I saw that little blue plus sign - when my cycle was just 1 day late lol!!
Twice I went thru miscarriage between week 8 and 12 but 3 times everything was fine. And even though the miscarriages were tough and some of the "sympathetic" comments were appalling, I wouldnt have been able to do it any other way.
Wow, you’re brave Mamaof3 but MashaAllah you’re blessed with your 3 boys Allah makes up for it and gives us strength to deal with such mishaps I guess.
I think my husband is like you… he would probably get the news published if he could. But I’m more of a private sort of person and I guess I’ll tell a select few… the close friends Thanks for your lovely reply
We told parents and siblings right when we found out. But we wanted to wait until the first trimester was over before telling anyone else. It had taken us so long to conceive that we still couldn't believe it! Anyway, my MIL and FIL respected our wishes, but my mother couldn't keep her mouth shut! Relatives were gathered, and she asked me if she could tell. I said, "No, not yet." Then she promptly turned to my mumanis and told them! I was so angry and she could not understand why since it was good news and everyone was so happy to hear. She said they always announced it when they found out, and didn't wait.
sheesh, i went thru the genetic testing early on too because we wanted to be aware of any potential genetic maladies. Each time, they asked if I wanted to know the gender and my response?
"No. uh.........WAIT!!! YES TELL ME!!!"
patience is a virtue that I am def not blessed with!!
Actually , I do believe in nazar lagna .. Unfortunately we do live in those times where envy and jealousy is common, not everyone will be happy in your happiness .. So just to be on the safer side , let people know when there is an absolute need for it …
Infact there is a hadees about it as well , that when you are blessed with a happiness dont go around showing it off to people .. coz you never know who might envy you for their own reasons … so just to be on the safer side share the news on the need to know basis only and eventually when inshallah the baby arrives everyone will know and have ample opportunities to show their happiness for you …
a huge congratulations Mia .. I hope Allah’s special blessings remain with you and all goes well and smooth
CB, I dont usually go for that kind of thing....but something that learned is to wear an unbroken circle of black to keep the envious and bad thoughts/wishes away. So I got some black silk embroidery thread and made myself an anklet to wear.
The first time iw as pregnant, we werent gonna tell anyone except family yet but someone asked MIL and she couldnt say no or lie. We unfortunately miscarried a couple of weeks later.
The second time we told both our mothers but kept it a secret till we heard the heartbeat at 10 weeks and saw her on a scan. Then i couldnt wait to tell everyone.
I was really excited the first time around and announced it almost everywhere. But later I really regretted it and wished I hadn't said anything.
I'm really lucky because aside from maybe 1-2 incidents, everybody was very nice and understanding (and still are).
Congratulations MIA…Wishing you a happy and healthy pregnancy and baby..Inshallah…
When we found out ,we almost told no one…just a few very close friends and my parents.
I believe in the nazar thing,but I think it was more because of the fact that there were some issues with the pregnancy initially and we were not even sure ourselves if we will make it through the first trimester.
Alhumdullilah when all was well,we told family and friends during the fifth month of pregnancy.
Luckily both me and my husband were on the same page regarding this.
When we found about the gender,I had been telling my husband not to say anything to anyone as we want it to be a surprise.He was really good with it while I told a few people right away
congrats MAinVA.... may Allah make it easy for you and give you a naik, healthy happy baby...
I think the couple should not disclose to everyone that they are expecting in the first trimester, it is not only about the envious ppl ... you don't know in your excitement apnee bhee nazar lag jaatee hai... and I really do think it is this time that the couple should take time out to come to terms that they will have another member being added to the family ....
In our case we didn't find out till 7 weeks...and the deal was that i wouldn't tell my family and he wouldn't tell his family .... the only reason my family members found out was coz of me getting nauseous at dinnertime .... and I ended up confirming it.... and so we had to tell his parents as well.... though in their excitement everyone in his family soon found out....
my hubby said one thing and I think that made me feel more confident ...he said ...if this baby is meant to come by Allah's will ...it will come regardless of when someone finds out and if it is not meant to come then it won't no matter how much we hide our pregnancy....
and if you do want you should share with your loved ones .... you never know whose duaa might help you in this time...
All the best... may Allah keep you safe and welll...aameen
when I came to know that I am pregnant, my MIL said don't tell anyone about this. So I ddin't . No body ever let me have the hint that they know I am expecting. But the fact was everyone in my inlaws knew I am pregnant , my MIL told everyone saying "kisi ko batan nahi" they were just keeping their mouth shut !
nazar do play an important role. But God wills to protect the baby the baby will be protected no matter what. So if u feel like telling anyone do so :)
a couple of my cousins are pregnant (both young around 20), and told everyone and their mother right away. One was only 5 weeks. I told them that maybe they shouldnt gave told everyone so earlier - in case of nazar.
But my other cousin said that if anything is meant to happen it will happen. And there is no big deal with telling anyone.
Well, I personally believe it's better to not tell anyone in the first trimester not because of nazar/evil eye but because it's naturally very easy to miscarry the baby.
Other than that, I really don't understand why desis believe in nazar evil eye and jadoo etc so much...Satan isn't above Allah and it's not so easy for anyone to just take away what He has blessed you with. Sure these things exist in this world but it's not so common and you need to have faith in God and keep praying/recite surahs that help prevent us Muslims from evil eye/magic. I strongly believe in the saying 'jise Allah rakhe use kaun chak khay' :)
OMG I’m like that too - the minute I find out I’m showing; but I’m chunky (okay fat) to begin with. How did it play out in the rest of you time pregnant. Did you get extremely big?
I know women who only gain 10lb in the whole frits trimester - I put on 10 pounds just the first couple of weeks when I stop living on a diet.
And I can totally relate to the 2nd half of your comment; I think its just easier to not say anything until the little booger pops. So I plan on being anti social the entire duration of the pregnancy.
and my husband is ecstatic (its our second child). I’ve told only a few close friends at work and his and my immediate family, he wants to announce it to the whole world :D.
I think my husband is like you… he would probably get the news published if he could. But I’m more of a private sort of person and I guess I’ll tell a select few… the close friends 
… your mom is so cute mashallah ..
