I recently had a low key wedding and other then our immediate family members, even my close friends were unaware of it. My mum is just so worried about the bad eye thing that I had to restrain myself to only tell one of my closest friend.
However it was a pleasant surprise for every one when I changed my marital status on facebook lol as nobody believed on it until my friends attended my birthday party which was also my wedding reception (I got married on my birthday)
Another thing about the photos being shared online, aside from people leaving mean comments, is that the photo could be used by a copy-dressmaker to advertise/sell a garment.
I know we all love looking at real bridal photos here on GS but it's different when a random dressmaker steals a wedding picture, sticks a big square on the bride's face with their logo or chops her head off the photo altogether and is using the photo as their shop window to sell a copy.
(This didn't happen to me by the way, but it upsets me when I see photos like this because chances are the bride doesn't even know her photos are being exploited in this way)
^This has happened to me several times... I have pretty openly shared my pictures but it's really annoying when I see someone take credit for work that they did not do. I have seen my pictures used to promote makeup artists and photographers that aren't even in the same country as I am in. I have also seen some random people on Facebook using it as their profile/cover photo... which is just weird because I don't know why anyone would want to do that? lol
I don't think there is anything wrong with saying not to take pictures if it's a segregated event because I know that most people are not careful with their pictures - i.e. share computers so men in the house can accidentally come across the pictures of women who cover. I wear a Hijab so whenever I've hosted an event where I'm not covering (my bridal shower and my mayoun), I ask guests not to take pictures. If I am not hosting the event though, I definitely cover up! Even for my sisters mayoun, I covered up because I wanted her to be able to show her pics to her hubby and inlaws.
I don't agree with restricting guests from taking pictures just because you don't want unflattering pictures though...
This is an interesting topic and I feel theres no right or wrong way to approach it. Its really about what the couple and their families want. Although I wouldn't go as far as printing a request on my invitation for guests not to take pictures, I can see why someone would do that if this is a sensitive topic for them.
For those who embrace social media at their wedding, i think its awesome to start a hashtag on instagram. A few years ago a bride i knew invited all the young folks to her events via facebook. She knew all the people invited through facebook would be receiving a formal invitation as well, but it was just a great way to have information about when and where the events were on Facebook as well and also to upload pics from events along the way. I liked that idea and am considering using it at my wedding. Often times family friends that I grew up with receive one formal invitation addresses to their parents which says MR and MRS so and so and family. It would be nice to recognize those close to you by including them on an event invite on a social platform everyone uses everyday. I love people feeling involved in my events, I feel like thats when theres the most hungama and dhamaal - when the guests feel like they are a part of a huge celebration, rather then just attending a wedding. If social media allows them that interaction then so be it. So cool how we can use these social tools to enhance our weddings if we wish to.
About the picture issue, something that upset me once was when there was a wedding in our family friend circle after a gap of 5 years. Everyone was super pumped about this wedding and at one of the women's only functions, i believe it was mayoun, my mom even got up and danced a bit when all the aunties and girls were dancing and having fun. I , never having seen my mom dance like that, was so excited I wanted to make a video of it to show my sister who lives in another city. I was then promptly asked to stop video taping by an aunty (just another family friend, not a relative of the bride) to stop taping because she wears hijab and didn't want a video of herself dancing. I thought that was rude. I didn't really know her and as she was my elder I didn't want to disrespect her so I stopped. But I let her know that I was simply video taping my mom, who I know would not mind a bit. If that aunty is engaging in behavior that she doesn't want video proof of, then in my opinion she should not put herself in that position. Don't rain on someone else's parade - take accountability for your actions!
She is the same aunty that cleared the mehndi hall of all boys because her daughter would be performing a dance. Then at her daughter's wedding there was lots of co-ed dancing. WTH? Why the back and forth on this standard? Make up on your mind and stick to one side of the issue. Uff. Ok I am done. #venting
My family and friends knew I was getting married so there were no surprises. My taya jan who was unable to attend the wedding posted on my fb after the nikkah had taken place. this is what he posted on my wall "The "nikah" ceremony has taken plae this afternoon. I spoke to N. She sounded very very happy". I thought it was very cute....
My pictures didn't go viral so had no issues. Few friends did put some pictures on their fb but they were some close friends.
I got married last year and I didn't really care nor put any thoughts in this. Both husband and I have relatives in Pakistan and other parts of the world who couldn't attend and obviously wanted to see the pictures right away. So my sister and SIL both uploaded our pics soon after the wedding and tagged us in too. I, frankly, didn't even get to check them until days later because hubby and I were so busy with post-wedding and moving to Europe. But yeah, didn't bother me. I never uploaded wedding pics myself anyway. People just saw whatever I was tagged in, or my profile picture as a bride.
I didn't mention anything on my facebook before the wedding but that's more because I usually don't update my statuses or document my life on FB or instagram all the time. To each their own but I don't find the need to document and announce everything going on in my life to people all over. But also, a week or so before the wedding, social media was the last thing on my mind anyway - I was barely checking facebook, twitter, etc. The people I needed or wanted to talk to were with me most of the time or just a phone call away.
As for letting people know - it was done through WOM initially and then formal invitations were sent out.
I don't think there's anything wrong in brides not wanting others posting her pics - the guests can post their pics of course, but if the bride or the groom doesn't want THEIR pictures posted, then I do think they have the right to at least request that. Not everyone wants their pictures showing up on other people's FB.
