For you ladies who may have gotten a lot of gold at your weddings, what do you do with it all? For many it sits in a bank and I don’t understand what I am supposed to do it with it because I will probably never wear most of it. Only one or two pieces I wore for my wedding and the rest that was given I have never touched. My mom makes me feel so bad because by saying I don’t want it she tells me I have no value for it and these things are important to keep! But I don’t see why? She’s consistently worried if whether or not its safe and periodically making me always make trips to check on it but it makes me even more nervous about owning such expensive things that I will never ever wear. It makes no sense to keep it. In my opinion. It’s to much responsibility and if I’m supposed to keep it for my daughter (if I have one) then what am I supposed to do if she doesn’t want it like me? lol
Am I wrong? Should I care more about the gold I was given? What do you guys do about your zevar? I feel so selfish for thinking it doesn’t mean as much to me as it does to my mom, it makes me feel so irresponsible, like I haven’t upheld a certain expectation. I like trendy jewllery real or not, I don’t really care, I wear what looks nice and traditional sets just don’t look that great with every outfit.
Hmm well didn't you choose the jewellery that your parents got made for you when you got married? My mother also insists on the massive sets (even though we are only having a reception and I will be wearing the in laws set on the day) but along with her choices , I have also played a large role in choosing sets and jewellery which I like and that I will wear after my wedding precisely so that it doesn't go to waste.
I've seen people sell their jewelery to buy jewelery they like. Not only do you have to care for things that you don't like or would wear, you have to pay zakat on it too.
I suggest you sell it and buy jewelry that you would actually wear
I think it would be a good idea to also choose lighter and more versatile sets (in addition to the wedding sets, course) that can actually be worn to various occasions when buying sets to avoid the problem of having them sit in the bank.
My two heaviest, massive all gold sets I traded in/sold off and got 4 smaller, more delicate and contemporary sets made, along with 2 bangles, a couple of chains and 2 sets of earrings :D
My heirloom/khandaani Hyderabadi sets which were passed down to me from my mom's own wedding jewelry are being saved to pass down to my potential daughter in laws and/or my sisters daughter (who is the only girl grandchild).
I don't believe in letting all that stuff sit around for no reason, especially if you don't like it and are not going to wear it ever .
But that's the thing, most of it was handed down to me. That's why I feel so bad. I'm the only girl on both my parents side and my husbands side. My MIL is deceased and it doesn't feel right to sell any of her things without knowing if that would be approved of. My husband doesn't mind and says he'll leave it up to me. As for my moms set, I think I want to just give back to her but I think it's going to hurt her feelings. I didn't choose any of my Jewelery, all of pieces were handed down except for 2 which are the ones I wear with everything now. Since all of it happened to match with my outfits I wore the heirlooms because it was important for everyone that I did except for on my Valima, wore a new piece because my dress was silver.
However, selling it for something more modern sounds like a good idea to me, I didn't think of a trade. I'll have to talk to my mom.
^ that sounds like such a good idea! I really have been wanting a yellow diamond ring!! I never thought of trading it in but I am feeling so much better now because it makes sense to be able to use these things instead of letting them collect dust.
I have two large sets, another one that's my mom and I asked for it, and 5 super cute small ones. Even though they sit in the bank most of the time...I don't want to melt them and get smaller ones. I try to wear them as much. But of course the larger sets I have only worn twice. But when you sale them or melt them to get others made you loose soo much gold in the process so I rather not do that.