Believe it or not, my dads cousin (who is a grown man in his 40's) came to everyday of my wedding in jeans, sneakers and a GAP sweatshirt. I don't know what the hell he was thinking, especially since everyone else in his family (siblings, bil, nephews, wife) were all dressed up properly in formal attire. We don't get along too well with their family (family politics), but my chacha (who is married to the guys sister - so his own cousin) insisted we invite them. But even with our issues, he could have at least out on khakis and a dress shirt if not a suit. And everyone noticed him! Our wedding was quite formal (just like the majority of Pakistani weddings) and he stuck out like a sore thumb.
The first party was my mayoon, and I was embarrassed that day....especially in front of my in laws (as most of our family friends know the issues we have with this family, so they wouldn't judge me or my family for this guys attire). But after that, I just thought to hell with him! This is my wedding and I'm not going to spare another thought on this dimwit! He just embarrassed himself.
a couple of people showed up to my wedding in jeans, I didn't really care. But then I'm not that formal I'd rather people do whatever makes them feel comfortable. Technically though, jeans are not considered proper wedding attire and most people I know wouldn't wear jeans to a wedding, desi or non desi.
But that's a special case - if given the chance, I'm sure it's not how you would have dressed, no?
Ive attended a very close cousins wedding in ghar kay kapray. I was wearing a non ironed shalwar qameez with faded dupatta. I was travelling and reached right before mehndi so couldn't change. She didnt care one bit. Instead waited for me to show up so that I can walk her to the stage. Loved her carefree attitude of not worrying about me ruining her wedding video.
Maybe jeans girl had some sort of time constraint? I dont think it would matter to the bride and groom what their guests are wearing. And definitely no disrespect. Imho.
Oh my never for myself or anyone in my family. Dont think it would be appropriate at all in my opinion. Completely agree about the vendors part. My photographer showed up to my wedding in linen pants and a tank top and although she was a pretty girl and didn't stand out, but it still didnt look very professional. I think thats key, to dress like a professional, I hate seeing caterers or other people running around the wedding in jeans or not dressed for the occasion. For guys its even easier, dress pants and shirt and their good to go. I have seen at a lot of Indian (Hindu) weddings people do show up very casually, even at some American weddings, people don't always dress up which always looks so odd to me. I personally haven't seen guests other than little kids wearing jeans to a Pakistani wedding yet.
Really? They don't attend formal
gora weddings where suits and cocktail dresses are a go?
I'd put in their invites to wear modest clothing so I guess they couldn't go down the cocktail dress route. They all came fairly covered up. I didn't mind and that's the most important thing.
Ive attended a very close cousins wedding in ghar kay kapray. I was wearing a non ironed shalwar qameez with faded dupatta. I was travelling and reached right before mehndi so couldn't change. She didnt care one bit. Instead waited for me to show up so that I can walk her to the stage. Loved her carefree attitude of not worrying about me ruining her wedding video.
Maybe jeans girl had some sort of time constraint? I dont think it would matter to the bride and groom what their guests are wearing. And definitely no disrespect. Imho.
well that's whole together another thing! U did not not dress up on purpose, it was time constraint. Anyone at that point would have been ok with it!
If the wedding I’m being invited to is in someone’s backyard and if the family is non-desi, then I MAY consider wearing nice jeans with a nice top/jewelry. But even then I’ll probably wear a dress. I simply cannot wrap my mind around wearing jeans to a wedding/reception that’s being held at a hotel. Unless its at a place like Motel 6. At my wedding, literally half the guests were non-desi. Venue was a nice hotel in downtown. Our invitation wording was formal but did not say anything about attire. Yet every-single-man who came to the wedding wore a suit, and every woman wore either a cocktail dress or desi outfit. Heck even the 3 kids (under 5) that were brought were dressed in nice/formal clothing! Even among the vendors…the only one wearing jeans & polo-shirt was my photographer/videographers.
In this case, I’d judge the parents. I assume the parents (especially the mom) were not in jeans too.
Ive attended a very close cousins wedding in ghar kay kapray. I was wearing a non ironed shalwar qameez with faded dupatta. I was travelling and reached right before mehndi so couldn't change.
But this is totally different for several reasons:
1) Even with your traveling issue, you still had a desi outfit on! Not jeans and a top.
2) This was the mehndi.....not the actual wedding ceremony/reception.
3) You being close family, the bride & the immediate family were aware of your time constraint/reason for not dressing up.
I have seen some moms who say their daughters don't wear desi clothes as a reason for them to turn up in jeans, boys too. But jeans with an appropriate top can be blinged up quite a bit to fit into the wedding crowd but they just turn up in what they wear lounging around at home.
But where in a modest dress code does it say jeans are ok to wear to a formal occasion as most weddings invariably are? Jewish weddings also require you to cover up- however, no one would be caught dead in jeans at one! Dress pants, dress shirts, long dresses, dresses with higher necklines and smart blazers on top to cover shoulders and minimize cleavage- the choices are endless. It just seems careless or lazy to show up in jeans without making the effort to dress nicely or investigate the cultural rules or norms that might apply. Belonging to a different culture is no excuse in this era where every kind of information is a couple of mouse clicks away IMHO.
I'd put in their invites to wear modest clothing so I guess they couldn't go down the cocktail dress route. They all came fairly covered up. I didn't mind and that's the most important thing.
I have seen some moms who say their daughters don't wear desi clothes as a reason for them to turn up in jeans, boys too.
For boys, there are options for pants other than jeans. And for girls, TONS of non-desi options like skirts/dresses...and if they insist on pants...no reason why they can't do a nice pair of slacks.
I'd put in their invites to wear modest clothing so I guess they couldn't go down the cocktail dress route. They all came fairly covered up. I didn't mind and that's the most important thing.
Lol, jeans aren't the only "modest" clothing....seriously, mind-boggling.
I would say no to jeans at a wedding... though someone did show up at my wedding in jeans. I wasn't bothered by it ... but it was just weird cuz everyone was in suits and sherwani (for men), and this guy was in jeans. He has twin babies so maybe a wardrobe malfunction happened before leaving. In fact all my non-desi friends / co-workers asked the dress code as they had never been to a Pakistani wedding... and i said formal ... but most of them went even further to wear formal dresses that are conservative and not revealing considering it's a Muslim wedding. For Nikkah, I told them explicitly to wear something completely covering the body as it was at the mosque and need to respect that. All my close friends wore desi formal stuff like shalwar kameez and sari.
I mean as a bride if someone showed up I wouldnt care, its not the end of the world. But I do think its rude. If guys wear jeans with a dress shirt and/or blazer, thats fine. But girls should not be wearing jeans at a wedding. Including teens. Its just not proper etiquette IMO.
At my wedding, literally half the guests were non-desi. Venue was a nice hotel in downtown. Our invitation wording was formal but did not say anything about attire. Yet every-single-man who came to the wedding wore a suit, and every woman wore either a cocktail dress or desi outfit. Heck even the 3 kids (under 5) that were brought were dressed in nice/formal clothing! Even among the vendors…the only one wearing jeans & polo-shirt was my photographer/videographers.