Shy,
I understand that we all like to vent once in a while, makes us feel lighter. But, needless to say, venting will get you nowhere if you don’t put things into action. We can’t really judge your MIL because we don’t know the woman…we’ve never seen her…and her interactions with you. One might even think that your MIL is just being “hospitable” by placing cakes and cookies in front of you. But like I said, you know her better.
If you are sure that she’s doing this out of jealousy and if you’re able to recognize her intent…then what do you plan to do about it?
You can either:
- Keep on making polite excuses “No, Ammi, they look delicious, but maybe later, I’m not hungry right now.” “Okay, I’ll just have one.” Making excuses will become exhausting. So, forget this plan.
Instead try: BEING HONEST AND FIRM.
You can still be polite while being firm and direct with someone. Just tell your MIL,** “Ammi/Aunti…there’s no need for me to go on and on about the importance of eating healthy and being physically fit. I plan to eat healthy and take care of myself from now on to the best of my ability. So, if you see me refusing the sweet treats you place before me, I want you to know that my intention is not to offend you. I’m only trying to look after myself and I hope that you will understand and cooperate with me in achieving this goal. You’re like a mom to me and I know you’d want me to be in good shape sine you value health so much yourself.”** (some verbal manipulation)
Or try giving her a subtle, sneaky, scolding response: “Ammi, since you’re so into maintaining your figure and eating healthy, it’s surprising that you’d place these goodies before us. Don’t you want us to be healthy as well?”
^Just tell the woman from the beginning that you have a HEALTH PLAN you are sticking to…and then she would understand why you’re refusing the junk food she puts in front of you. Who knows? She might even feel a bit stupid/guilty for trying to tempt you.
***** Apart from that…YOU…need to become more stronger and develop more will power. No matter how much your mother-in-law, mother, sister, brother, father, husband, neighbor, friend, grandma, aunt, uncle, coworker tries to tempt/push you to eat something…YOU DON’T HAVE TO DO IT. You can be JUST AS PERSISTENT as them in refusing their offer. I’ve been in situations where aunties push me to eat food…and I politely tell them it was wonderful but I’m quite full. They push some more…I refuse some more. I stand my ground. Eventually they leave or give up. After all, how long can an aunti/MIL talk about food? IF you do end up eating that cookie or slice of cake…you have YOURSELF to blame more than others cuz nobody can force you to eat in the first place.