issues with back home relatives, wat to do

[Roshni]

Re: issues with back home relatives, wat to do

@Umer

In this kind of situation I’m not really sure whether it’s wise to marry in Pakistan, unless your family can find a way to search for a Rishta there independently.

Can not really find anyone on our own as we have not lived there for about 15 years plus mum has to rely on chachoos to go and meet someone. in rural woman cant really do on her own.

@Spiral

Tell your brother to go find someone on his own before your parents force him to marry someone he doesn’t want to.

@Muzna

what does your brother think about finding someone on his own and simply taking his future in his own hands?

we tried searching here in aus but not able to find any suitable. plus bro is conservative type and wants to go back to marry. and my parents are happy in the sense that he will be having links to home country if he gets marry there (meaning will continuously visit with his future wife).
*

@Enterprise

Your brother has to get married and spend the rest of his life with the girl. Don’t force him to be miserable for the rest of his life.I have found that it is best to cut of relationships with people who you cannot trust, even if they are close to you. In the short term there will be drama and emotional blackmail, but your family will be much happier in the long term.

@SweetLady

Your brother should have the right to choose for his own life…what does your mother say about the behaviour of ur dadkeys? Can’t she talk with your dad ?

@pakistanimard

Find rishta out of family. Dad family woud never approve rishta fron your mom family. Go out of family, problem sovled.

we are not forcing him, infact dad even asked him to find some one. but when dadi contacts dad thats when the issues start.

there is no one on mum’s side to do rishta (all are engaged or married), but my mamoos are very social and do travel alot. and they referred some people, and even dad was happy as the families were religious and girls educated etc. but than chachoos come in again.

dadi cries to dad that his bro has many daughters, not financially well (this is a lie; gud business living in isb), its not easy to get girls married off, no gud rishta. if my bro gets married some outsider with take benefit of his lifestyle, money etc than why let our girls have that.

my mum is totally depressed. We dont call our chachoos anymore and only dad calls them. when dadi cries on phone with dad, dad gets upsets and than my parents end up having fight over this issue.

we do want some one out of family as there are too many cousin marriages in our family plus all cousins have reputation of their own; plus there is too much family politics now with too much cousin marriages.