Re: islamic rulings for newborn babies
This 1 goat/2 goats sunnat is not the discrimination of any type. I dont know the reasoning, but it should not be taken as male superiority or what not.
Re: islamic rulings for newborn babies
Sabiha2 : I know it is the duty of the parents if they can afford to do the aqeeqah they should. My hubby's mother wanted to do the aqeeqah so we did it almost a year later (Lots of things going on in our life so we couldn't do it earlier). She paid for 2 lamb for my son. We could afford it but we let her pay for it because it would make her happy. I made dinner with the aqeeqah meat and all the family came over.
Re: islamic rulings for newborn babies
could one goat vs. 2 goats have something to do with "Rehmat vs. Nehmat" ..
I'm thinking you have to give more sadqa for nehmats compared to rehmats?! I feel I have heard tht somewhere .. Could be totally off
Re: islamic rulings for newborn babies
Sabiha2 : I know it is the duty of the parents if they can afford to do the aqeeqah they should. My hubby's mother wanted to do the aqeeqah so we did it almost a year later (Lots of things going on in our life so we couldn't do it earlier). She paid for 2 lamb for my son. We could afford it but we let her pay for it because it would make her happy. I made dinner with the aqeeqah meat and all the family came over.
Thanks automne77 i can understand it would make the grandparents happy but i am so annoyed as it's our first child and we would love to do everything by ourselves if you understand what i mean. the grandparents have no idea about my difficult pregnancy. i don't know how to relax my mind i just want to vent out and say this is my child i am going through with every single pain in the pregnancy.
Re: islamic rulings for newborn babies
[quote=““TLK””]
I thought u give silver, noy gold.
Re: islamic rulings for newborn babies
Thanks automne77 i can understand it would make the grandparents happy but i am so annoyed as it's our first child and we would love to do everything by ourselves if you understand what i mean. the grandparents have no idea about my difficult pregnancy. i don't know how to relax my mind i just want to vent out and say this is my child i am going through with every single pain in the pregnancy.
how about you let them think they are paying and then use that money towards sadaqah for your child. and then just pay for all of the aqeeqah yourselves. its not like they would be seeing receipts for everything, right? just let them know you would prefer the cash upfront. or you could ask them to pay for the goat/s and you pay for the function.
Re: islamic rulings for newborn babies
^SGC, aqeeqah is a sadqa act as p er sunnah, therefore only valid if you can afford it.
Sabiha2 I felt the same way as you but trust me, you will share a lot more 1st time things with your baby, and I did the aqeeqah dinner at a time when I couldn't do it, (I was working, and life was tough in other ways too) and no one thought of what would be easier for me but in the end it is just one day and we don't celebrate b'days so I wanted to do a BIG party but my MIL was insistent on the day, you know what I did I kept quiet. I did the dinner my way, I got dressed up and my family brought balloons for my baby, I made cupcakes with footballs (my son could recognize them) and I had a good time.
Plus this way grandparents feel like you are letting them be a part of your child's life if you celebrate b'days let them do the aqeeqah and u do the b'day.
You will cherish other things in your child's life that grandparents can not cherish may Allah bless you with a naik and saleh baby and may they be healthy and happy. Aameen.
Re: islamic rulings for newborn babies
^ she can afford it, but so can her in-laws. its just that they want to pay for it and she'd rather they didn't. so maybe their money goes towards zakat or kheirat unbeknownst to them (though it'll still be going toward a good cause), and the parents can pay for the aqeeqa as they wish.
Re: islamic rulings for newborn babies
I have heard the 2 goats for boys/1 goat for girls thing is not about discrimination, or celebrating a boy more than girl - I looked this up, because I felt it was a little unfair as well, and this what I came across (dont have a reference though)
At the time of the Prophet (saw), the people preferred boys to girls because girls seemed to carry more of a financial burden for parents (thats what people thought), so only 1 goat had to be sacrificed for a girl so that those people didnt feel that girls were a financial burden on them, whereas for a boy they would have to pay more for 2 goats.
As for the inheritance Nomica was mentioning, the reason guys get 2 for every 1 girls get (from their parents) is because girls also inherit from their husbands, whereas guys only inherit once.
Re: islamic rulings for newborn babies
^SGC, aqeeqah is a sadqa act as p er sunnah, therefore only valid if you can afford it.
Sabiha2 I felt the same way as you but trust me, you will share a lot more 1st time things with your baby, and I did the aqeeqah dinner at a time when I couldn't do it, (I was working, and life was tough in other ways too) and no one thought of what would be easier for me but in the end it is just one day and we don't celebrate b'days so I wanted to do a BIG party but my MIL was insistent on the day, you know what I did I kept quiet. I did the dinner my way, I got dressed up and my family brought balloons for my baby, I made cupcakes with footballs (my son could recognize them) and I had a good time.
Plus this way grandparents feel like you are letting them be a part of your child's life if you celebrate b'days let them do the aqeeqah and u do the b'day. You will cherish other things in your child's life that grandparents can not cherish may Allah bless you with a naik and saleh baby and may they be healthy and happy. Aameen.
Aww thanks for duas, really need them. Dont know why but had tears in my eyes.
I understand your point will try to relax myself i feel it is just the beginning.
Re: islamic rulings for newborn babies
^ she can afford it, but so can her in-laws. its just that they want to pay for it and she'd rather they didn't. so maybe their money goes towards zakat or kheirat unbeknownst to them (though it'll still be going toward a good cause), and the parents can pay for the aqeeqa as they wish.
Thanks SGC will discuss with my husband.
Re: islamic rulings for newborn babies
I have heard the 2 goats for boys/1 goat for girls thing is not about discrimination, or celebrating a boy more than girl - I looked this up, because I felt it was a little unfair as well, and this what I came across (dont have a reference though)
At the time of the Prophet (saw), the people preferred boys to girls because girls seemed to carry more of a financial burden for parents (thats what people thought), so only 1 goat had to be sacrificed for a girl so that those people didnt feel that girls were a financial burden on them, whereas for a boy they would have to pay more for 2 goats.
As for the inheritance Nomica was mentioning, the reason guys get 2 for every 1 girls get (from their parents) is because girls also inherit from their husbands, whereas guys only inherit once.
that makes a lot of sense.