Do you ladies think it’s sexist and misogynistic and backward for a guy to believe that men should be the primary provider for a home?
Discuss. ![]()
Do you ladies think it’s sexist and misogynistic and backward for a guy to believe that men should be the primary provider for a home?
Discuss. ![]()
No, its not. I believe in gender roles. I think its a beautiful balance Allah has created which shouldnt be disturbed.
To my limited knowledge, Allah has made men the providers for their families. So my understanding is that it’s a duty for them whereas it’s ‘permissible’ (under various conditions) for women. Duty/obligation and ‘permissible’ are not on the same level. If a woman’s beliefs are genuinely shaped by her deen, then I don’t think she should find it sexist or misogynistic if a guy upholds the above view or even if (let’s say) he’s okay with her working but wants his income to be the primary source.
In some situations, it’s necessary for both partners to work. In others, money is not an issue, but a wife may still work as a personal choice. There’s nothing shameful or backwards in being a housewife either as she’d still be contributing to the marriage/home/family.
[quote=““third string””]
Do you ladies think it’s sexist and misogynistic and backward for a guy to believe that men should be the primary provider for a home?
Discuss. ![]()
[/quote]
I think a subsequent question to ask would be…do ladies think they can have it all…be a high flying corporate women and also have a family…
I work full time and it keeps me sane (to an extent
)…but I have less on my plate right now. There ain’t no high-flyin’ anywhere in my career; there’s no promotion to ‘executive educator’ if you put in more hours, lol. Hypothetically speaking, if I had a young child that was dependent upon me and if my spouse could afford it, I’d rather be with my kid…than to come home exhausted after raising other people’s children all day and not having enough energy for my own family. I belong to a very draining profession even with its comparatively shorter hours.
It is men?s job to take care of their six pack while the wives support them in this highly spiritually rewarding endeavor
I don’t really believe in gender roles or anything but maybe I’m just too egotistical to take any money from my wife/girlfriend. I think it’s pride thing lol which makes me think if it’s sexist.
Personally, I would not want to be with a man like that. I want to work outside the home, have a career, and contribute to the household’s income. A man believing that would definitely be a red flag for me. However, if a woman wants to be a homemaker then the logical thing would be to look for a man who wants to be the “provider.”
I guess you can say I think that someone who believes in set-in-stone roles for the sex is probably a sexist.
haha, its funny how many women with their sky high career aspirations and delusions of grander re their earning potential suddenly start subscribing to gender roles and start respecting men’s role as main provider when (and if) they manage to find a good catch.
There is nothing like being the lady of leisure, living life of luxury with relatively very little effort, joining the social circle of trophy wives and showing off their husbands’ wealth.
Ahan. And how does your Oifu support you in this aspiration of yours? By not laughing? ![]()
Lol..as I guy…I would pick that life any day! A life of a guy is all about competition and working hard…if I had the choice to be a house wife living the life of leisure hands down, sign me up.
This is how I see things playing out in my social circle around the mosque, family friends etc…
Those women who do have high flying careers (Dr’s, Lawyers, Pharmacists, Engineers, Managers) they’ll be lucky to get married by 27…if that..on avg..most of these women are in their 30’s…If they are still looking, they are looking for someone their equal..which they don’t really find. At this point their willing to settle… cause after 35 the chances of having a kid drastically falls. But even than its hard for some of them to find a guy…the ones that do and did end up getting married.. in 5- 10 years in that marriage…it eventually ends up in divorce…(and lucky if they have kids at all)…
Sure you’ll have those examples where do balance both work and family…but thats the exception to the rule i feel…I think women can actually do both…but its better for them to start a family first..and then later on go to school when the kids start going to school… 100 years ago..women were getting married 15+ to 20… just logically makes more sense from a biological point of view…
This of course is all assuming they want kids…
My dad Alhumdolillah earns well and my mom’s a housewife and I wouldn’t say she lives a life of complete leisure…that she spends money like water…and does nothing at all. I have come across housewives that do fit that description, but I also know of many who still pull their weight in the marriage; take care of the kids and their needs, keep the home well managed, etc.
Well I’m not against women working lmao. I meant even if I had a wife that had a lot of guap, I wouldn’t want a penny. Like she spend on whatever but I think I’m too proud to take anything. I don’t even like random gifts for this reason cause I feel indebted lol, makes me wonder if it’s sexism or just a pride thing on my part?
"Is it sexist to think that men should be the primary earner of the family?"
When married life becomes a competition, then both sides loose! ![]()
Men exist to protect and provide for women. Women exist to comfort and please their men. This is how it has been for thousands of years and this is how it will remain for thousands more to come. ![]()
I enjoy working. Much like red it keeps me sane. I often take sabbaticals after stressful contracts end to “reset” and spend time with the kiddo. I don’t require someone to pay for my life. I think for me the best case scenario would be someone willing to pool resources together to travel, pursue philanthropic work together, take care of family, etc. As long as all parties involved know where each other stands and are consenting/ comfortable with the “roles” then I don’t think there is any true right or wrong situation.
But not everybody’s is like that. There are always statistical outliers, so I think people deviating from the norm shouldn’t be shamed.
Plenty of men wake up around noon everyday, watch TV or play video games all day while their wives are out working. Similarly, there are plenty of women who cannot manage to work but constantly nag their husbands for newer, bigger and better stuff regardless of affordability. Both situations are quite unfair.
Having said that, I would find it very difficult if I?m not the primary provider of my family. I want to be ?needed?, not just ?wanted?. If a woman has everything that I could provide, I wouldn’t see my place in her life. A damsel in distress is hard to resist.
Seen too many examples like this.