Is it gossip or fair disclosure?

[redvelvet]

@Sehrysh

I found out something about a person I know who I used to hold in high regard and who I assumed was naik and shareef. The information dispels by belief in the person’s naiki and sharafat.

I personally don’t hold with spreading gossip - when someone tells me something I keep it to myself since it’s not my place to share the information with anyone else.

The thing is if you hear information about a person that is true and opens your eyes to their reality but the person is only peripherally connected to your life, should you refuse to listen to the information as the sharing of information is or may be considered to be gheebat or gossip OR is it right to have full knowledge about a person’s true character so you can make an informed decision about them and your association with them?

Sehrysh,

How deeply involved are you with this individual? I can understand having the “right” to know of a person’s character for rishta purposes…or if you might be doing business/professional work with the person…of if he/she will be moving in with you, etc.

But, if it’s someone whom you don’t see on a regular basis…someone you see only occasionally…i don’t think you have the “right” to know. The word “right” to me sounds like “ENTITLEMENT”…and it just doesn’t sound “right” to me, lol.

Let’s say that you’ve heard negative things about this person from someone…okay…so from now on just limit your contact with this person. Just maintain a distance if you think that ANY association with this person will affect your reputation, etc.

^Think of it as “being alerted or being on your guard”…as opposed to having the right or sense of “entitlement” to knowing about a person’s gunnahs. Because although many of us are not murderers, thieves, rapists, etc…I’m sure that many of us have made our mistakes/sins…and would not feel comfortable with others feeling they have the “right” to know about them.

Once again, you do have MORE of a “right” to know about a person’s true character for purposes like rishta, business, etc. If knowledge about their past mistakes is not going to impact you or your life…then it seems odd to think you have a “right” to know.

Some other things to consider:

1. Consider the source that is telling you this information about this particular individual that you once thought was really naik and shareef. There are always two sides to a story. People can be jealous and say negative things about others out of spite. Even if one doesn’t have negative feelings, it’s possible that the person sharing the information with you has “misunderstood” or “misinterpreted” the situation and is seeing only one perspective of it.

2. People repent their mistakes, learn from them, and move on from them. If they were to dwell on their failings, it would be harder to progress forward and become better. And if people were to throw their failings in their face all the time, that would also hinder progress.