Is it fair to reject someone based on their bad reputation

Lifestyle Relationships
, ,
21

Re: Is it fair to reject someone based on their bad reputation

it could be any thing for example four letter verbs

*bach, back, bade, bail, bait, bake, bale, balk, ball, band, bang, bank, barb, bard, bare, barf, bark, base, bash, bask, bate, bawl, bead, beam, bean, bear, beat, beef, been, beep, bell, belt, bend, bent, bias, bide, biff, bike, bilk, bill, bind, bird, birl, birr, bite, bitt, blab, blat, bled, blew, blob, blot, blow, blub, blue, blur, boat, bode, body, boil, bolt, bomb, bond, bone, bong, bonk, book, boom, boot, bore, born, boss, bowl, brag, bray, *

22

Re: Is it fair to reject someone based on their bad reputation

These double standards are perpetuated by women themselves. I mean girls are still fine if a prospective guy is going to nightclub, yet will go ahead with rishta, a guy will reject if a girl does it.

23

Re: Is it fair to reject someone based on their bad reputation

Monki, words ending with y won't count since there is an "s" and y will have to be changed to "ie" and hence become a 6 letter word.

24

Re: Is it fair to reject someone based on their bad reputation

yeah.. even that example there is one word, i should have put stars for...

25

Re: Is it fair to reject someone based on their bad reputation

Its unfair, sure.

But what's fair will not always be reality.

Reality is, when two parties are thinking of marriage who don't know each other well...they rely on other sources like the community, references and reputation.

26

Re: Is it fair to reject someone based on their bad reputation

hannah would you marry her to your brother.

27

Re: Is it fair to reject someone based on their bad reputation

I don't think these words would fit the sentence. This is something only OP could verify.

28

Re: Is it fair to reject someone based on their bad reputation

Unfortunate, but this happens all the time.

I have aunties adding me in the community on FB, I’m sure just so they can spy on me, and get the real scoop as they figure out whether to recommend me or not to someone.

:rolleyes:

You are who you are at the end of the day, and presenting a false image of yourself isn’t helpful. If a person has a past, and it’s known to people and it’s not discreet (like obvious dating in college, etc), then no use hiding it. It will be found.

A guy asks me if I’ve had a relationship, and I tell them - I liked some guys, got rejected; I talked to some guys, things fizzled out, in some cases family didn’t like me, or had other girls in mind. It’s the rishta process, unfortunately or fortunately you are in talks with other people, and if some want to view that as relationships, then great, I’ve had about 300-500 of them. I am pretty sure I’ve contacted about 300 on shaadi dot com alone that had mutual interests and I had 1-2 telephone conversations or text messages that didn’t go anywhere with the vast majority of them.

shrugs You’re looking for a husband so you will end up talking to other guys, whether people like it or not.

The right guy for you shouldn’t have issues with that. Having said that there are a lot of normal guys out there that totally understand you may have talked to another guy in the past. Because they’ve dated/talked to other girls in the past themselves, and they get you need to do that, and you can’t live in a bubble if you’re to marry someone.

Then there is the arranged route, where everyone pretends to be an innocent virgin who hasn’t even LOOKED at the opposite sex - but if you’re like most people you’ve at least TALKED to people of the opposite sex.

I’m a total advocate for being upfront to the other person and putting your cards on the table. I don’t need anyone finding out about bad news about me from someone else, no point.

29

Re: Is it fair to reject someone based on their bad reputation

^beep can fit.

30

Re: Is it fair to reject someone based on their bad reputation

This is precisely the problem. I met a guy a few days ago and he is newly engaged. Says his fiance is a wonderful innocent, never dated, loves that about her that she’s so gullible.

He has dated up and down left and right and diagonals since he was 16. He has probably checked off every ethnicity/nationality, and lost virginity multiple times.

Says he wouldn’t take a girl if she’s not a virgin. He was giving me relationship advise and told me to never tell anyone I spoke to IT guy or any other guy in the past.

WTH is wrong w/folks?

And no this guy is not a paindoo, he’s a successful educated Pakistani-American who speaks impeccable English, well read and says he is religious.

#ThingsIdon](http://www.paklinks.com/gs/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=ThingsIdon) 'tunderstand

31

Re: Is it fair to reject someone based on their bad reputation

Oh yeah no, lots of girls Beep around with guys, its the norm.

32

Re: Is it fair to reject someone based on their bad reputation

Whats wrong with IT Guy? what if you have to have your computer fixed?

33

Re: Is it fair to reject someone based on their bad reputation

It won’t be as much of a problem if girls too would reject these guys, hence don’t think these are “double standards”, there are certainly are “different” standards by which a girl judges a guy and a guy judges a girl. People shouldn’t complain about such things. And most pakistani americans with impeccable English are "beep"s.

34

Re: Is it fair to reject someone based on their bad reputation

#beepit](http://www.paklinks.com/gs/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=beepit)

35

Re: Is it fair to reject someone based on their bad reputation

or bangit.

36

Re: Is it fair to reject someone based on their bad reputation

#bangit](http://www.paklinks.com/gs/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=bangit) lol I think the aunties might take offense to that.

37

Re: Is it fair to reject someone based on their bad reputation

Did you keep quiet when he was saying this stuff?

38

Re: Is it fair to reject someone based on their bad reputation

lol yeah “religious”
Sure

Anyway, he sounds like a creep and a predator. God help that woman.

39

Re: Is it fair to reject someone based on their bad reputation

This is so commonplace now, that honestly, I've given up trying to say anything. If I say anything, I'm a crazy nut anyway, and no one changes their behavior.

I did point out that things are different for girls because we don't engage in pre-marital relations AS MUCH as the guys out here do, yet we have to deal with very different repercussions, and he did agree that is the case that he has noticed too.

So it's not like these guys do not know. They know perfectly well. Are they going to change despite a PCG hathora on the head type lecture? No, it will make them act out more in fact.

40

Re: Is it fair to reject someone based on their bad reputation

That would be 5 letters.